McHayduke

I had to fire someone yesterday. It broke my heart. I know it was the right decision, I know I had to do it; arguably, it might’ve been the right decision to do it months ago. However, being able to lean on “knowing it was the right decision” (just typing that makes me cringe – such cliche prattle) hardly eases the pain. It’s a small office, like really small. Only a handful of us there. The distinctions between associates and friends disappear almost immediately in an environment like ours. Knowing that I just mounted financial stress on a friend’s family is crushing me right now. But, I also know that sometimes this is just the nature of the business beast, and not firing this person would’ve put the rest of the company in jeopardy.

Still, what’s really eating at me is the nagging doubt that maybe this could’ve been avoided. If everyday of the past several years wasn’t blithely spent in a post-drunken haze, wouldn’t I have been more proactive in finding an alternate solution? I’d like to believe so, and that’s such a damned shame.

It would have sooooo easy to slide through the ol’ quickie-mart on my drive home last night…just pick up a little nipper to dumb things down a bit. I didn’t, but LAWD it would’ve been easy.

PhoenixJ

I am glad you did not Mc. Try not to personalise- but it is good you are human. Remember triggers and HALTS(ad). Good post.

Maudcat

Maybe things would have been differen had you not been drinking, maybe not. I believe that things go the way they are meant to, and there are reasons behind everything that goes on. We just don't always see them til much later.
Many years ago, someone I loved hurt me badly. For years, I saw the situation in a certain way. Lately, for reasons I don't get, I have been reflecting on what happened, and I have come to see my part in it.
I wasn't blameless, tho his bad acts were heinous, no question.
It's good that you aren't drinking.
Peace.

RetiredGuy

Congrats on getting through a tough situation without drinking, you are building up your "sober muscles".

herculana

Sober Muscles INDEED <3

Thank you for sharing. On day 5 (me), every personal experience on the path of sobriety is SUPER Helpful for my own path and renewed strength.

CONGRATS ON 14 DAYS!!!!

Youre paving the way for me, and I am grateful.

Dee74

Being an adult is hard which is why I ran away from the responsibility for many years. Conflict is hard too, as is doing the right thing.

At 2 weeks in, I think you're doing great McHayduke.

I understand the what ifs - but really, none of us know what might have been.

You said yourself not firing this person would’ve put the rest of the company in jeopardy.

For a boss that's the bottom line.

SoberLeigh

Glad you maintained your sobriety despite your very challenging day!

ThatWasTheOldMe

Those are the types of days where you gotta kick *** and stay sober.
Well done

They don't say one day at a time for nothing.

McHayduke

Thanks for the replies everyone, I really appreciate the feedback.