SunnyDenver

Like many on here, I've been on the relapse merry go round for quite a while now- it seems I can string together 3, 4, 5 days and something sets me off an running again, whether it's getting stuck in traffic or worrying about my future.

I lost my last job last year due to a bad relapse and not showing up for work for two days. Well, over the past 4 months I've been interviewing, and I got a new job that's really a great opportunity. Thing is, it's across the country from where I am now and I have a LOT on my plate with moving my stuff, my car, and my dog. Not to mention living in a new place and starting a new job. I've heard advice about not making any big changes in early recovery, but I needed a job and wanted to get on with my life. I live alone and have a few friends where I am moving, but in many ways it will be like starting over. One the one hand it could be a new chapter in my life and a chance at a re-start, but I'm also pretty fearful that I'll get overwhelmed by it all and want to drink. Anyone else have experience coping with big life changes like this while also starting a (hopefully) new road of recovery?

Anna

I'm sorry you're struggling, but it sounds like you're working hard on your recovery.

I moved the very week I stopped drinking due my husband's job change. I moved to a place where English was not the first language so I couldn't work. And, I started an intense volunteer job that same week. The move itself was a positive thing for me and the volunteer work saved my life.

Since your new job is a good one with good opportunities, it will help to ease your stress, I think. Since you have a few friends where you are moving, that could be helpful in the early days of settling in. It might be a good idea to think about doing something in your community such as sports or volunteer work to help you connect with your new area. Moving can be overwhelming for sure, but making lists can help a lot. Try to remember that there will be frustrations with moving, but things will sort out.

Shitzupuppy

I personally think moving is great! A new place for the new you. No old routes or faces or places that trigger you. A brand new start! How exciting!

Ariesagain

My first year sober we bought a building lot across the country, put our house on the market, and dealt with my parents' health falling apart. The first three months of my second year, I moved my parents into assisted living, cleaned out and sold their house, euthanized two of our cats, sold our house and drove two nervous dogs, one cat, and a grumpy husband 3400 miles to a new temporary (and horrible) apartment. And I am absolutely nothing special in the courage department

If I can do it, so can you. The thing about getting through really scary stuff and staying sober is that you then know that if you can do THAT and not drink, a bad day at work hardly qualifies as a reason to drink, now does it?

So it kind of kicks your would-be excuses right in the butt.

You will need support. i pretty much lived here the first year and still do some weeks. In person support would be good, too...finding a therapist who understands addiction would be a big help. AA and other programs are another option that works for many here.

There are those who say no big changes the first year and the reasoning is sound in that it's easy to be passive and wait for the new environment to magically make you want to stop drinking. It doesn't work that way...you still have to take control of your recovery.

Wishing you clarity and success.

Dee74

The 'rule' is a suggestion.

They way I heard it was no unnecessary changes - I think the object is to avoid any stress and strain where we can.

Sometimes tho? change is necessary.

I moved house in my early months - had no choice I was renting and the building was sold. I met my partner in those early months too.

Change isn't easy - but you can do the necessary stuff - with support

Tons of that here

D