Here goes yet again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 91
Here goes yet again
Hi everyone,
My first post (long time lurker). I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster. I haven't gone a week without binge drinking in 8 years. I live with my mom /drinking buddy which doesn't help. Two weeks ago I drank my own body eight in vodka and woke up the next day feeling sick shaky and spaced out , so much it scared the hell out of me which is when I decided I need to stop and I did . I made it 5 days then Friday came around and I only had 3 drinks. Felt great on Saturday and Sunday. Went through the next week feeling like I was getting somewhere and now I'm back to square one. Thought I'd have a couple on Friday that led to most of the day Saturday and all day yesterday. I had to leave work because I was vomiting so much this morning. I told myself I could control the drinking but in fact I don't think I can. I know I self medicate with alcohol to relax and the thought of a life without it is daunting, it's actually sending my anxiety through the roof the day after a binge.
I don't want to put my health at risk , I know bingeing is very dangerous. To be honest I didn't really think it was a problem because most of my family are alcoholics and drink every day and I don't. This situation has really crept up on me over the years. Reading the posts here really help and any advice is appreciated.
My first post (long time lurker). I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster. I haven't gone a week without binge drinking in 8 years. I live with my mom /drinking buddy which doesn't help. Two weeks ago I drank my own body eight in vodka and woke up the next day feeling sick shaky and spaced out , so much it scared the hell out of me which is when I decided I need to stop and I did . I made it 5 days then Friday came around and I only had 3 drinks. Felt great on Saturday and Sunday. Went through the next week feeling like I was getting somewhere and now I'm back to square one. Thought I'd have a couple on Friday that led to most of the day Saturday and all day yesterday. I had to leave work because I was vomiting so much this morning. I told myself I could control the drinking but in fact I don't think I can. I know I self medicate with alcohol to relax and the thought of a life without it is daunting, it's actually sending my anxiety through the roof the day after a binge.
I don't want to put my health at risk , I know bingeing is very dangerous. To be honest I didn't really think it was a problem because most of my family are alcoholics and drink every day and I don't. This situation has really crept up on me over the years. Reading the posts here really help and any advice is appreciated.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
I'm so glad you decided to post! That is a step in the right direction. Be sure to rehydrate today and eat some pudding or something. Ice cream would be good cause it has some nice sugar to help as well.
If you can miss work tomorrow to try and get your body sorted out, that could be helpful. Even if you have to claim a fake flu ... at this point it would be better than not rebuilding you body after this binge.
You might want to join the Class of May 2017 thread. I find that hanging around with others in the same place of this struggle to be very helpful.
Although I was really a daily drinker with bouts of sobriety, I have experienced some of the binge events due to this.
Coming here and then posting took a lot of courage which will serve you well as you move forward!
If you can miss work tomorrow to try and get your body sorted out, that could be helpful. Even if you have to claim a fake flu ... at this point it would be better than not rebuilding you body after this binge.
You might want to join the Class of May 2017 thread. I find that hanging around with others in the same place of this struggle to be very helpful.
Although I was really a daily drinker with bouts of sobriety, I have experienced some of the binge events due to this.
Coming here and then posting took a lot of courage which will serve you well as you move forward!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
You might check out AVRT on the secular thread. It does include a plan ... so if you are planner it might be a good fit.
Also, you might include some time on SR and even try out the Chat feature.
Let us know how the day goes.
Also, you might include some time on SR and even try out the Chat feature.
Let us know how the day goes.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
Hi Charli,
I know how it feels to be on and off of the nasty buzzed roller coaster. Maybe you could focus on healing your body today, and nothing else. If you need to take a few more days...do it! I found it best to sleep as much as possible, take multiple showers, and eat lot's of small meals. Looking down the road at a life of sobriety may be too daunting for you today. However if you remember this feeling, (sick, tired, scared, anxious, regretful) and remind yourself of it often in the future, sobriety begins to look pretty darn good!!
This is the last time you ever have to feel like crap....
I know how it feels to be on and off of the nasty buzzed roller coaster. Maybe you could focus on healing your body today, and nothing else. If you need to take a few more days...do it! I found it best to sleep as much as possible, take multiple showers, and eat lot's of small meals. Looking down the road at a life of sobriety may be too daunting for you today. However if you remember this feeling, (sick, tired, scared, anxious, regretful) and remind yourself of it often in the future, sobriety begins to look pretty darn good!!
This is the last time you ever have to feel like crap....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 91
This is the last time you ever have to feel like crap....
Amen!
I'm feeling a lot better and slept most of the day . Have to work tomorrow but I need my mind to be active because I mentally torture myself . Sometimes when I went to work hungover I'd always say to myself , your gonna stay and do the whole day because this is your punishment!
Amen!
I'm feeling a lot better and slept most of the day . Have to work tomorrow but I need my mind to be active because I mentally torture myself . Sometimes when I went to work hungover I'd always say to myself , your gonna stay and do the whole day because this is your punishment!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,384
Welcome to SR Charli 
Its tough living with your drinking partner, but it's not a dealbreaker - many people here have spouses, partners or family members who drink.
Good sober support is key or course, and you'll find a lot of that here
Its tough living with your drinking partner, but it's not a dealbreaker - many people here have spouses, partners or family members who drink.
Good sober support is key or course, and you'll find a lot of that here
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,537
It's great to have you with us, Charli.
I insisted for years that I could use willpower to manage the amount I drank. It never worked once. If only I'd admitted I couldn't touch a drop. I'm glad you're taking a look at what it's doing to your life.
I insisted for years that I could use willpower to manage the amount I drank. It never worked once. If only I'd admitted I couldn't touch a drop. I'm glad you're taking a look at what it's doing to your life.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: here, now.
Posts: 1,236
Glad you're here. Stay close and ask for help. Read about making a plan and what that means. You can do this. They're right: you never have to feel like crap again. (Well, I mean, there is the real flu, which happens, but you know...)
B
B
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 91
Hi there
Just checking in. First weekend without binge drinking. It's may sound strange but I feel weird not being sick and hungover!! I feel bright and alert. Friday night I binged on Netflix and instead of buying vodka I bought some nice food and the opportunity came up for me to work last night so I took it and earned some extra cash. Up at 6am , house cleaned and laundry done I'm heading out to the market.
The money I would have wasted on booze , more booze , pain killers , heart burn pills. I'm really feeling hopeful.
. Day 7 for me and I can feel the difference already. Hope everyone has a good Sunday
Just checking in. First weekend without binge drinking. It's may sound strange but I feel weird not being sick and hungover!! I feel bright and alert. Friday night I binged on Netflix and instead of buying vodka I bought some nice food and the opportunity came up for me to work last night so I took it and earned some extra cash. Up at 6am , house cleaned and laundry done I'm heading out to the market.
The money I would have wasted on booze , more booze , pain killers , heart burn pills. I'm really feeling hopeful.
. Day 7 for me and I can feel the difference already. Hope everyone has a good Sunday
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: North Georgia Mountains
Posts: 588
Charli,
Welcome and congrats on getting through your first weekend without booze. It is hard at first, but if you stick with it, it will become easier. The reward for all your efforts will be a new found freedom from booze, which is a great feeling!
Welcome and congrats on getting through your first weekend without booze. It is hard at first, but if you stick with it, it will become easier. The reward for all your efforts will be a new found freedom from booze, which is a great feeling!
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