starting over
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Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 4
starting over
Hello. I had written a few days ago about my son and his having a seizure. He is doing really well. Goes to AA meetings every day, sometimes twice a day. He now has a sponsor. At some point he will move (another state) and have to deal with his divorced wife, and custody, getting a new job, etc. How do people in recovery deal with all that type of stress? It is all going great here as he has so much support. When he moves he will have to find meetings and support there. And this will be a totally new place as his ex-wife moved there, and in order to have a relationship with his 3 yr old son he wants to be there. Anyone have any thoughts or stories on how their lives changed from AA and how they were able to handle difficult, emotional family changes? Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
The steps are what helps us Alcoholics in AA to deal with life on life's terms.
You could always have a read of the Big Book of AA (available online to read for free, or cheap as chips at a meeting if your son would pick you one up - he might even lend you his own copy ). Also there is a book called Living Sober (another AA one) which explains things pretty well which is worth looking at.
Any meeting that is listed as 'open ' is one that you would be welcome to attend and listen to people talking about how they're dealing with life right now. You don't have to go with your son, but could do if he'd go with you.
Me personally, I still have the same pressures now as I did before I stopped drinking, and when I quit drinking but hadn't worked the steps. In those days my life seemed unbearable. Now it's still tricky at times, but I know things will work out okay. Or not. And I can just deal with it. I don't get in a frenzy about stuff or people I can't control, and I don't waste a bunch of energy trying to project some kind of facade to people that is unnecessary and probably even counterproductive. My life feels completely different now, and I am very content. The AA Promises have materialised for me. If you have not read these, here they are....
1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed
before we are half way through.
2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
4. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.
5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
8. Self-seeking will slip away.
9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for
ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us -
sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.
Hopefully your son will have done a significant amount of step work with his sponsor before he moves. And when he moves he will find meetings just like those he's got used to, and seek out a new sponsor so he can continue that work.
Prayers for you and your son.
BB
You could always have a read of the Big Book of AA (available online to read for free, or cheap as chips at a meeting if your son would pick you one up - he might even lend you his own copy ). Also there is a book called Living Sober (another AA one) which explains things pretty well which is worth looking at.
Any meeting that is listed as 'open ' is one that you would be welcome to attend and listen to people talking about how they're dealing with life right now. You don't have to go with your son, but could do if he'd go with you.
Me personally, I still have the same pressures now as I did before I stopped drinking, and when I quit drinking but hadn't worked the steps. In those days my life seemed unbearable. Now it's still tricky at times, but I know things will work out okay. Or not. And I can just deal with it. I don't get in a frenzy about stuff or people I can't control, and I don't waste a bunch of energy trying to project some kind of facade to people that is unnecessary and probably even counterproductive. My life feels completely different now, and I am very content. The AA Promises have materialised for me. If you have not read these, here they are....
1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed
before we are half way through.
2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
4. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.
5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
8. Self-seeking will slip away.
9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for
ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us -
sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.
Hopefully your son will have done a significant amount of step work with his sponsor before he moves. And when he moves he will find meetings just like those he's got used to, and seek out a new sponsor so he can continue that work.
Prayers for you and your son.
BB
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