We'll Take the Soft Option Weekender 12-14 May
saoutchik
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,198
We'll Take the Soft Option Weekender 12-14 May
Friday night, Saturday Night - for me and perhaps for many of you these times of the week can steamroller any good intentions we have about not drinking into the dust.
Because of work or family commitments it will be the first opportunity we will have had to get some time to ourselves. We do need this time, in order to decompress from a weeks build up of tribulations at work and at home. It it any wonder our thoughts turn to drink or drugs?
There is a dilemma here because we all need time to relax and unwind but for me at least almost all of my cravings have come at times like this when I am relaxing. When I am busy or my thoughts have been occupied I don't think about alcohol at all.
For all of us but especially those of us who are in early recovery or who want to stop but have not yet done so, this weekend make yourself do something that is non-drinky, for example going to a movie. It will seriously reduce the amount of will power needed to resist the mid evening cravings and you can schedule in some doing nothing time for the morning when most of us are not troubled by cravings and when you will be enjoying not being hungover.
This is being active in recovery and it is enjoyable rather than a feeling like a penance -
it is a whole lot easier than dealing with another hangover.
I'm all for making recovery easier and considering the downsides of drinking I would say it is taking the easy option and why not?
Let's make this weekend a good one!
Because of work or family commitments it will be the first opportunity we will have had to get some time to ourselves. We do need this time, in order to decompress from a weeks build up of tribulations at work and at home. It it any wonder our thoughts turn to drink or drugs?
There is a dilemma here because we all need time to relax and unwind but for me at least almost all of my cravings have come at times like this when I am relaxing. When I am busy or my thoughts have been occupied I don't think about alcohol at all.
For all of us but especially those of us who are in early recovery or who want to stop but have not yet done so, this weekend make yourself do something that is non-drinky, for example going to a movie. It will seriously reduce the amount of will power needed to resist the mid evening cravings and you can schedule in some doing nothing time for the morning when most of us are not troubled by cravings and when you will be enjoying not being hungover.
This is being active in recovery and it is enjoyable rather than a feeling like a penance -
it is a whole lot easier than dealing with another hangover.
I'm all for making recovery easier and considering the downsides of drinking I would say it is taking the easy option and why not?
Let's make this weekend a good one!
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
Hahahaaaaaaaa, Dee, did you get shotgun????
Sao, excellent opener as usual, I am in!
In very early recovery I picked a movie at the beginning of the week for us to go to on Friday. It was preplanned so there were no questions about what to do. In fact, even now, my entire weekend, for the most part, is planned. It only makes sense that if you're busy doing things that can't or don't involve alcohol the ease of staying away from it increases exponentially. Busy your mind and your mind won't be busy pondering things it shouldn't.
Today is my lunch with my prior bosses. Odd how the universe works. Setting no expectations but I can't help but be excited.
Have a great weekend everyone!
Sao, excellent opener as usual, I am in!
In very early recovery I picked a movie at the beginning of the week for us to go to on Friday. It was preplanned so there were no questions about what to do. In fact, even now, my entire weekend, for the most part, is planned. It only makes sense that if you're busy doing things that can't or don't involve alcohol the ease of staying away from it increases exponentially. Busy your mind and your mind won't be busy pondering things it shouldn't.
Today is my lunch with my prior bosses. Odd how the universe works. Setting no expectations but I can't help but be excited.
Have a great weekend everyone!
Sober-T- Dragon
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Manitoba
Posts: 8,758
Originally Posted by LadyBlue0527 
...Today is my lunch with my prior bosses. Odd how the universe works. Setting no expectations but I can't help but be excited....
Although I was drinking every night, I recognized Friday as the hardest evening to resist.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Originally Posted by saoutchik
This is being active in recovery and it is enjoyable rather than a feeling like a penance -
it is a whole lot easier than dealing with another hangover.
it is a whole lot easier than dealing with another hangover.
Lady Blue, I am remiss in not adding my congratulations to you on your anniversary. That's great work! Way to go!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
I'm in Sao...thanks for the opener!
For the last few days I've been contemplating getting away for the weekend. There's a great place that we go to in the mountains. Lot's of pampering, clean air, activities galore. My only worry is triggers... these trips have always included drinking. Is it too soon for such a venture?
For the last few days I've been contemplating getting away for the weekend. There's a great place that we go to in the mountains. Lot's of pampering, clean air, activities galore. My only worry is triggers... these trips have always included drinking. Is it too soon for such a venture?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
I'm in AND I made it on the first page this time. Whoo hoo!
Nice intro Sao and a lot of good points. Plan, plan, plan and make back up plans just in case the original plan doesn't work out. Emergency back up plans. Here's how it works. My husband, who is still struggling in the early stages of staying sober cannot manage to get home by himself on Friday nights from work. If left to his own devices, he inevitably doesn't get home until Saturday morning after a night of overindulgence. His Friday night plan lately is contingent on my cooperation. I load the kids in the car, I pick husband up at work. We leave his car at work and we go do something together as a family. A few weeks ago I loaded the kids in the car. Exiting the highway by husband's job, traffic was atrocious. Turns out, the entire street to get to his job was completely blocked off due to a house explosion. Couldn't get to him. He couldn't get to us. Kids and I went home. Husband had not back up plan. He didn't come home until Sunday morning after texting me that he was still alive, he felt like sh#t and his car was missing. Always have a backup plan. Houses can explode, your car might not start, your friend cancels at the last minute. BACKUP PLANS.
Enough said. Friday is tomorrow. We're picking up husband and going to see Guardians of the Galaxy.
Nice intro Sao and a lot of good points. Plan, plan, plan and make back up plans just in case the original plan doesn't work out. Emergency back up plans. Here's how it works. My husband, who is still struggling in the early stages of staying sober cannot manage to get home by himself on Friday nights from work. If left to his own devices, he inevitably doesn't get home until Saturday morning after a night of overindulgence. His Friday night plan lately is contingent on my cooperation. I load the kids in the car, I pick husband up at work. We leave his car at work and we go do something together as a family. A few weeks ago I loaded the kids in the car. Exiting the highway by husband's job, traffic was atrocious. Turns out, the entire street to get to his job was completely blocked off due to a house explosion. Couldn't get to him. He couldn't get to us. Kids and I went home. Husband had not back up plan. He didn't come home until Sunday morning after texting me that he was still alive, he felt like sh#t and his car was missing. Always have a backup plan. Houses can explode, your car might not start, your friend cancels at the last minute. BACKUP PLANS.
Enough said. Friday is tomorrow. We're picking up husband and going to see Guardians of the Galaxy.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
CT, it's only too soon if you let that thought take hold. I still do all the things I used to do. I know some people say to avoid certain places, but when I quit I knew I was done and there was no circumstance under which I would drink again. Of course there were thoughts of it - still are on occasion. It doesn't make me buy it, pour it, drink it. I'm not really a believer in "triggers," that sounds to me like an excuse to drink. There is nothing or no person or place or emotion that could "make" me pick up a drink. I don't drink. No matter what.
Have you read through the AVRT threads? Really good stuff there. I actually quit with the blinding light/one moment insight method combined with a handful of AA meetings and lots of time on this forum. I have a hundred little mind tricks for it, but it comes down to I don't drink.
If you are lurking the thread or if you haven't joined the forum yet - today is your day. Jump in, it feels good to get stuff off your chest. I found comfort in my March Class thread in early days.
Have you read through the AVRT threads? Really good stuff there. I actually quit with the blinding light/one moment insight method combined with a handful of AA meetings and lots of time on this forum. I have a hundred little mind tricks for it, but it comes down to I don't drink.
If you are lurking the thread or if you haven't joined the forum yet - today is your day. Jump in, it feels good to get stuff off your chest. I found comfort in my March Class thread in early days.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
Thanks Bim- I've read through the AVRT threads and I actually use some of the concepts. I guess I'm just so protective of my sobriety, I don't want to mess up. Plus, DH is still drinking (hiding it and telling me he's done). Just don't want to put myself in a sticky situation.
You're right, I don't drink...so why do I concern myself? Going to give this some more thought before I make a final decision.
Thanks for your feedback. Much appreciated!
You're right, I don't drink...so why do I concern myself? Going to give this some more thought before I make a final decision.
Thanks for your feedback. Much appreciated!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
CT, a weekend away in the fresh mountain air sounds kind of relaxing. While my husband doesn't drink or use around me, it's still stressful to have to deal with the aftermath. However, I'm here to give you some hope that despite what HE is doing, YOU don't have to drink. It can be done.
Lists are an awesome thing that I haven't fully taken advantage of. I've got a long list of things I need to get done. I'm finally crossing them off instead of leaving it to memory to remember what needs doing. Doctor appointments? Check and in multiples. I've gotten more done in two days on that front than all last year.
Lists are an awesome thing that I haven't fully taken advantage of. I've got a long list of things I need to get done. I'm finally crossing them off instead of leaving it to memory to remember what needs doing. Doctor appointments? Check and in multiples. I've gotten more done in two days on that front than all last year.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
