skybert

Usually I am quite emphatic with people, but today I feel really challenged!
Story goes like this: Wife out drinking yesterday, coming home late. I was home drinking my tea and went to bed after a hot bath. I was up fresh and bright early, and went on my walk with my dog. And then, a few hours later, my wife came down with red eyes, pale face and in a horrible mood, yelling at me, the kids and god knows what.

I know she is a bit irritated that I don't drink any more (she has told me). In my head she has used my drinking as an excuse for her own habit, and now she is on her own.
I just can't feel a single inch of empathy with her. I am in no way angry with her for yelling, but it is hard to ignore her.
Now she left the house for some hours, and the harmony is reinstated. She will be calmed down when she is back, and I will do as I usually do: Go easy on her to keep the harmony.

I think this is a lesson to me, and may be others in recovery: Our choice to go sober do impact our surroundings in mysterious ways!
Right now, I am just even more motivated to keep sober. Not to wake up as a wreck is a blessing!!! It has almost become an addiction in it self- a good one IMHO

-skybert

PhoenixJ

good thought- to remain grounded and focus on what we can control- not others.

Done4today

Alanon

remember she is sick

Sunflowerlife

I would feel the same in your shoes and I consider myself a very empathetic person! Also, we tend to judge in others what we judge most in ourselves. I know that is the case for me when it comes to my husband. I get upset when he yells at the kids because I also get mad at myself when I do the same. I used to judge his drinking (he doesn't drink anymore) because I was constantly judging mine.
Just something to think about

LifeWarrior

me again typo on my last post it's 6 days sober hit post before I saw error