Change is coming Weekender 21-23rd April
saoutchik
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
Change is coming Weekender 21-23rd April
What has change got to do with a thread about staying off of drugs and alcohol at the weekend? Good question.
Everyone reading this knows how hard quitting is. Long before I admitted to myself that I have a problem I thought "I need to cut down" and "I need to quit" So I tried. The reason I am writing this and the reason you are reading it is because we all failed. Repeatedly in my case.
If you have tried stopping and relapsed you likely felt some or all of shame, guilt, embarrassment, despair, and worthlessness. It shatters your self belief.
The old, discredited view of alcoholism/addiction is that it is a moral failing by weak people (it seems plenty of people still think this). The modern, scientific view is that a series of chemical hooks and nets hijack our brains. If this second view was the whole truth then we could quit, endure some discomfort and move on but it isn't and so just stopping doesn't work.
We need to change things, take "steps," work a plan or strategy - whatever you want to call it - to alter those routines, those situations and most importantly those feelings that lead us to picking up or using.
Albert Einstein reputedley said that doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result was the very definition of madness.
This weekend why not make some changes and see where it takes you?
Everyone reading this knows how hard quitting is. Long before I admitted to myself that I have a problem I thought "I need to cut down" and "I need to quit" So I tried. The reason I am writing this and the reason you are reading it is because we all failed. Repeatedly in my case.
If you have tried stopping and relapsed you likely felt some or all of shame, guilt, embarrassment, despair, and worthlessness. It shatters your self belief.
The old, discredited view of alcoholism/addiction is that it is a moral failing by weak people (it seems plenty of people still think this). The modern, scientific view is that a series of chemical hooks and nets hijack our brains. If this second view was the whole truth then we could quit, endure some discomfort and move on but it isn't and so just stopping doesn't work.
We need to change things, take "steps," work a plan or strategy - whatever you want to call it - to alter those routines, those situations and most importantly those feelings that lead us to picking up or using.
Albert Einstein reputedley said that doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result was the very definition of madness.
This weekend why not make some changes and see where it takes you?
Sober-T- Dragon
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Manitoba
Posts: 8,761
Doh! I nearly forgot to check for the new weekender....
One daily routine I certainty don't miss is the self chastising in the morning 'cause I simply wasn't 'getting it'. There was also the morning ritual of 'I won't drink today' followed by the evening ritual of 'OK, just one or two, let's take it easy'.
One daily routine I certainty don't miss is the self chastising in the morning 'cause I simply wasn't 'getting it'. There was also the morning ritual of 'I won't drink today' followed by the evening ritual of 'OK, just one or two, let's take it easy'.
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Thank you, Sao.
I hope that i will move to my own apartment on two weeks. I just cant waot for it.
There has been a lot of turmoil at my present job, but unexpextedly i got a good bonus and bought a washing machine!
This was one of major concerns -how i am going to do without it.
Now i am loooking for some small fridge.
And then i will be all set.
I am still waiting for the final approval at my new job, and i am impatient and anxious at the same time.
Have a great day, everyone.
See you later.
I hope that i will move to my own apartment on two weeks. I just cant waot for it.
There has been a lot of turmoil at my present job, but unexpextedly i got a good bonus and bought a washing machine!
This was one of major concerns -how i am going to do without it.
Now i am loooking for some small fridge.
And then i will be all set.
I am still waiting for the final approval at my new job, and i am impatient and anxious at the same time.
Have a great day, everyone.
See you later.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: usa
Posts: 3,938
I'm in for another sober weekend!
great intro Sao.....change for me was essential in sobriety. In the beginning I was so bored....cause I had these blocks of empty time when I used to drink. Long story short, I filled this time with volunteer work, hobbies, excercise, aND socializing. When people asked me what I did on the weekends when I drank I would say "nothing." In sobriety my weekends are now full of fun activities and I'm never bored. I now have fulfillment and joy in my life. Life so much better. But I did have to make some major changes.
I hope everyone has a great day today!
great intro Sao.....change for me was essential in sobriety. In the beginning I was so bored....cause I had these blocks of empty time when I used to drink. Long story short, I filled this time with volunteer work, hobbies, excercise, aND socializing. When people asked me what I did on the weekends when I drank I would say "nothing." In sobriety my weekends are now full of fun activities and I'm never bored. I now have fulfillment and joy in my life. Life so much better. But I did have to make some major changes.
I hope everyone has a great day today!
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
Change , WHAT !
no... no... no...
I want to hang around in bars until closing time and get another lemonade in at 10:59 and hang round till 11:30pm ,
I want to keep an extra bottle of mineral water in the airing cupboard or an old box in the garage just incase i need a top up.
I want to wake up in the morning wondering what phone calls i made or e-mails i sent .
I need to distribute my trash to several bins so the bin-men don't know what i'm doing, I like to shop at several shops so they don't know what i'm buying either..
LoL , change these days i welcome it, with sobriety i'm not scared of it anymore .
I'm in ,
m
no... no... no...
I want to hang around in bars until closing time and get another lemonade in at 10:59 and hang round till 11:30pm ,
I want to keep an extra bottle of mineral water in the airing cupboard or an old box in the garage just incase i need a top up.
I want to wake up in the morning wondering what phone calls i made or e-mails i sent .
I need to distribute my trash to several bins so the bin-men don't know what i'm doing, I like to shop at several shops so they don't know what i'm buying either..
LoL , change these days i welcome it, with sobriety i'm not scared of it anymore .
I'm in ,
m
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
I am SO IN! Sao, thanks for the (as usual) thought provoking and inspirational opener. Congrats on shotgun MB!
bimini, sometimes I forget what day it is even when I am working!
Hope you all have a great day
bimini, sometimes I forget what day it is even when I am working!
Hope you all have a great day
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Old Me: I'll just make some minor changes. I'll only drink 5% or less beer, no more than 3 days a week, and never at home, unless we have guests, but I won't even keep it in the house if there aren't guests coming over, and no more than 2 of those 3 days can be consecutive, unless it's a holiday weekend.
New Me: None.
Sometimes the major changes are just plain easier than the minor changes.
New Me: None.
Sometimes the major changes are just plain easier than the minor changes.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 292
In for another sober weekend. Speculation is that this may be the weekend we see our first 100F (~38C) day here in the Phoenix area.
The heat isn't for everyone, but the dry sunny weather has been pure gold for my sobriety. Damp, grey, and dreary weather was always a powerful trigger, before I moved here.
The heat isn't for everyone, but the dry sunny weather has been pure gold for my sobriety. Damp, grey, and dreary weather was always a powerful trigger, before I moved here.
saoutchik
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
Originally Posted by DesertDawg 
In for another sober weekend. Speculation is that this may be the weekend we see our first 100F (~38C) day here in the Phoenix area.
The heat isn't for everyone, but the dry sunny weather has been pure gold for my sobriety. Damp, grey, and dreary weather was always a powerful trigger, before I moved here.
The heat isn't for everyone, but the dry sunny weather has been pure gold for my sobriety. Damp, grey, and dreary weather was always a powerful trigger, before I moved here.
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