Doing a happy dance today.

Old 04-18-2017, 09:27 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
Doing a happy dance today.

****Abuse trigger warning, but it has a happy ending.


Sometimes Karma takes a while.

Many of you know that over a couple of years ago I went to court with a friend against her abusive ex. He had beaten her up an uncountable number of times. I never witnessed anything other than verbal abuse, but she would text me pictures of her injuries, and call me begging not to let her then boyfriend come home...because he and my ex were drinking buddies and often getting hammered together. So, I had *some witness testimony based on calls and text messages, and conversations from when I would pick up her and the kids because hed leave them without food or a vehicle.

It was a difficult time - they both were "our" friends...and when she decided to press charges, I dropped him as a friend and took her side. I spent the next 6 months trying to help get her and her kids moved and safe - all while the abuser would come and hang out at my home with my ex. She won a permanent restraining order - he can never see her or his kids again (you have to be some kind of monster to be awarded this in Montana...) He served 50 days in jail - for pulling a loaded shotgun on her in front of their kids, and splitting her head open with a space heater. They moved 4 states away in fear when he got out.

Then, he got a new girlfriend. They would come over and hang out, I warned her hes an abuser, and very soon after they started dating, she started telling me about the abuse. I was getting ready to leave my ex at the time, and knew that if I did, the abuser would target me - because "I am a rat." I spent the next year after leaving xabf waiting for the abuser to retaliate against me, but he never did other than flipping me off in traffic and passing on threats through mutual 'friends.' In that time, I went to court with the now new ex twice for the same reasons against him.

No kids were involved this time, she got a 6 month protection order, and he got 6 months of probation and $200 restitution. For kicking her in the back, breaking into her house, trying to kill her dog, and for choking and slapping her. THAT'S ALL. That sentence was delivered 18 days ago. It was pretty defeating, and her and I both have continued to look over our shoulders...until yesterday.

18 days after he was sentenced for her assault, he was arrested for transporting 1/2 pound of meth from Washington to MT. The paper mentioned the assault case he was JUST sentenced for, and also said that he's got another drug case pending.

The 2 women I know that he has beaten up are a FRACTION of the women and children hes terrorized through the years....and, as of last weekend, it's over!! He will be gone for a long time.

Although this meme makes me laugh...Karma - shmarma...i'm just glad everyone is safe, because he finally sunk himself.

firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 09:32 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
A work in progress
 
LexieCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
SWEET!!!

I hope his butt is locked up with no bail due to the probation violation and other charges.

Happy-dancing right with ya! It's like Al Capone getting nailed for tax evasion. Or OJ getting nailed for that stupid robbery. It would be nice to nail him for the WORST thing he did, but hey--if it gets him off the streets...
LexieCat is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 09:38 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
$150k bail Lexie The judge is OVER him. The paper quoted the prosecutor “because he is completely unable to follow any court orders.”

This article is in our Bozeman paper if you want to read online....it's not like I'm trying to protect the innocent

I'd love to know what sentence he'll be looking at. I believe the 6 months suspended but on probation for assault is revoked, right? So hopefully 6 months on top of the drug charges. And, this isn't his first rodeo on drug charges, he had a biog one a long time ago...so I am hoping he gets second offence. Don't know what the other current drug charge is about either.
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 09:42 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
abbccj03's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 114
So glad karma finally caught up with his abusive a**!!! What a jerk! I know you are happy to be free of the burden of a possible run in.
abbccj03 is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:00 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
A work in progress
 
LexieCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I was amused to read that they also seized a meth pipe and a bong. No doubt the defense will be "personal use," lol. "Honest, Your Honor, I'm a VERY hard-working addict--I would've smoked all that up, myself!"
LexieCat is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:05 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
I love the "strong local ties" plead....yeah....your strong local ties are currently jonesing.
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:15 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
A work in progress
 
LexieCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
And I just wanna add this, firebolt. You are my HERO for helping those women, at some not inconsiderable risk to yourself.

I've gotten into arguments with my (very nice) first husband, who thinks it's "irresponsible" to intervene in potentially dangerous situations. I strongly disagree. If I'd gotten taken out by some abusive a**hole in the course of my work, or my daily life, protecting someone who needed my help, my kids would have survived and, I think, been proud of me.

I'll never forget the guy who literally had his jugular vein cut in the course of pulling off a man who was stabbing his neighbor (both victims lived, along with the baby the female victim had been carrying on her chest in a baby pouch--the baby fell out when the female victim sank to her knees during the initial attack). The attacker was the baby's father. I have no doubt that the neighbor saved both of their lives. We nominated him for a Carnegie medal (which he was awarded).

I so admire what you did.
LexieCat is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:26 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
Thanks so much Lexie! It was scary, and definitely caused a rift between friends. I can't imagine how much courage it's taken so many women to leave him...he is big, volatile and scary...BEFORE the methamphetamine.

I can't imagine how often advocates and people in YOUR field are targeted....and just keep fighting every day despite.

Fist bump! Someone has to do it...God knows his male friends didn't step up, on the premise that "it is none of their business."

So cool about the Carnegie medal <3 Thanks for all you've done for victims!
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:30 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
honeypig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
I'm going to echo Lexie, fb, and say how proud I am to know someone who acted as you have acted in this situation! Many people would not have "gotten involved" or would have counseled "letting it blow over", minimizing the seriousness of the actions. I truly hope that justice is done and he gets everything he so richly deserves.
honeypig is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:49 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
Smarie78's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Anywhere, USA
Posts: 869
way to go firebolt! It's nice to know in the world we have advocates for victims.
Smarie78 is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:51 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
Thanks Honeypig - aside from the shock of seeing someone abused, you all - the rallying and the stories here were undeniably a push for me to act as best as I could.
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 11:11 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
hopeful4's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Wonderful, I hope he ROTS!
hopeful4 is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 11:56 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
Isn't it sad state affairs that we are doing a happy dance over such terrible matters.
hearthealth is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 01:23 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
I don't know .. it's sad that there is such a meth problem, and it's sad that there are abusers, but I think that

1 - having a meth runner out of commission, and
2 - a few women don't have to drop their kids off at school and worry all day that their "dad" will do something to hurt them, and
3- that more women than I care to think about don't have to look over their shoulders for him for a few years
is plenty to be happy about!

Hes been a career criminal since long before adulthood. Hes a diagnosed narcissist, and a well documented thief, abuser, alcoholic and drug pusher. My home town in general is much safer with him locked away, let alone women and families spread across 5 states. To me, it's not sad for anyone but him.
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 01:28 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
A work in progress
 
LexieCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Absolutely. I see nothing sad about it. There is evil in this world, and to put an engine of evil where it won't harm the innocent is, rightly, something to celebrate. This isn't a guy who was so driven by addiction that he hurt someone without intending to (e.g., drunk driver). This guy systematically injured people and was helping distribute a drug that ruins countless lives.

I'm still dancing, lol. Good thing I work from home.
LexieCat is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 01:51 PM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
The really sad part to me is that really good people fall in love and have kids and then stay with people like this all the time. The fear, lack of self esteem and sickness behind that absolutely breaks my heart.
firebolt is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 02:02 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
Originally Posted by firebolt View Post
I don't know .. it's sad that there is such a meth problem, and it's sad that there are abusers, but I think that

1 - having a meth runner out of commission, and
2 - a few women don't have to drop their kids off at school and worry all day that their "dad" will do something to hurt them, and
3- that more women than I care to think about don't have to look over their shoulders for him for a few years
is plenty to be happy about!

Hes been a career criminal since long before adulthood. Hes a diagnosed narcissist, and a well documented thief, abuser, alcoholic and drug pusher. My home town in general is much safer with him locked away, let alone women and families spread across 5 states. To me, it's not sad for anyone but him.
I don't disagree. It's just this guy has negatively effected the lives of how many women? He has also had the impact of all the addicts that he supplied. It's all in the past but the trauma may still linger.
hearthealth is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 02:24 PM
  # 18 (permalink)  
A work in progress
 
LexieCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Originally Posted by hearthealth View Post
I don't disagree. It's just this guy has negatively effected the lives of how many women? He has also had the impact of all the addicts that he supplied. It's all in the past but the trauma may still linger.
Very true, but now they can heal in peace and safety. There are TONS of resources to support healing.
LexieCat is offline  
Old 04-18-2017, 04:13 PM
  # 19 (permalink)  
Member
 
DesertEyes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Easy does it people, this site is G-rated and we have children lurking all the time. Please keep it extra clean.

Mike
Moderator, SR
DesertEyes is offline  
Old 05-03-2017, 10:39 AM
  # 20 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
firebolt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
Ugg - and now hes out on bail. This feels defeating and never ending for me, I can't imagine how his victims feel. He has skirted consequences of his actions over and over again. If he pleads not guilty in a couple days, hes just out and "free" with stipulations until it goes to trial in a year or so (from past experiences with our courts and his lawyer)....is that right Lexi?

I'm concerned for all that have ever been on his 'mad at' list because meth + narcissist + anger+ nothing to lose...
firebolt is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:21 AM.