Cobber3

ive got 158 days today and as i dont have to tell you its been ups and downs. Ive lost weight, started surfing and exercising double what i was when i was drinking and still am having a hard time mentally. When it comes to booze, i literally dont give two hoots about ever drinking again. I go to the liquor store everyday for a can of chew and never once think about buying a beer. My life has significantly improved in these days without it and i do not plan on going back. The thing that has been the fricking thorn in my side lately is this constant state of anxiety, almost an anxiety if i am going to have anxiety feeling. I dont get the, i am having a heart attack i think i am dying anxiety. I get social anxiety, which go a lot worse towards the tail end of my drinking and the only way to cure that........ booze of course. I drank 12 beers on average every night for a while and know that 5 moths or so, theres no way my brain has healed. I thought i would ping you guys for past/current experiences just to make sure im not the only one losing my mind. Its weird, like if i am talking to people that im not familiar with and obviously dont have that booze i almost panic in my head and get dizzy and feel just anxious. Put a 12 pack in me and i can talk to warren buffet about fiscals like i went to harvard. Sober, i sketch out internally talking to the guy at the drive through. Its starting to drive me mad a bit, i still put myself in those situations because i refuse to let them interfere with my life. I am hoping that they subside with time, i just have no one to relate to that gets it in my life. I have to be at traffic court in a hour and am already nervous to stand up in the courtroom. Everyone i talk to here, thinks anti depressants and pills are the only option. I would rather not trade one drug for another and am hoping everyone says it will get better and you will grow a six pack and have all the money in the world if you stay the course . Any feedback is greatly appreciated! Happy Monday.

Poppy79

G'day
I personally think that given a bit more time you will continue to grow in self confidence and let go of the illusion that you were a confident person only when drinking.
I'm on day 159 so I get how you are feeling I think. The first few months were quite hard readjusting to everyday situations without my 'friend, the booze'.
Have you tried some self talk? Have a conversation with yourself, tell yourself this is a learning curve and this constant anxious feeling will pass. Seems to work for me more often than not these days.

badger257

If you can do it w/ alcohol in your system, you can definitely do it without it. Its just a mental game and what we talk ourselves into thinking that we can only operate with the relaxation of booze. The same person behind the booze is the one that is confident, self assured and driven! (and I would venture to say even more confident). Take a deep breath and focus on how valuable you are, and build on it going forward. good luck at court, I am sure you will be great. Will be thinking about you.

PippoRossi

This is soooo true, Badger! I had convinced myself that I could get more done around the house on the weekends if I had a few drinks in me to "relax." At the end of the day I would say to myself, "Well done!" Then, the next morning, I'd get up and take a look at the finished product and cringe! My work had been done with the accuracy of a 5 year old - very sloppy! Nope, alcohol does not make it all better. Quite the opposite.

Done4today

Congrats Cobber on 158 days that is a great accomplishment. Sounds like you have a hold on the booze. I know I dealt with anxiety issues so far throughout my sobriety. They have lessened in intensity and frequency. Praying and meditation have help tremendously. Good luck

Soberwolf

Have you spoken to a Dr about this - congrats on 158 days and know you will always have support here

JustTony

"It will get better and you will grow a six pack and have all the money in the world if you stay the course."

But seriously - just read some of the great success stories on here and you know the answer is that it will improve greatly.

Strength to you!