Harry02

I'm really disappointed in myself. I have been drinking daily for around 2 weeks now and I was determined to break the cycle and have a night off. My last drink was 4am and it It got to about 10:30pm and I just couldn't do it. I don't know how to describe the overwhelming feelings or reason. If I was to try I'm just filled with extreme anxiety, no concentration, pacing up and down. Earlier in the day I was so confident this would be my first night/48 hour break.

I have been reading the forums a little more recently and need to break this cycle somehow. Even just 48 hours off the drink would be a good start. I remember a post by Dee i think it was about recovery and i've been memorizing HALT - hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Which is great because i'm sure when in recovery these are triggers and you need to understand that the real reason is HALT. Maybe add make it HALT C, cravings those cravings will pass and how to deal with cravings.

I have been thinking about a basic plan for recovery and I think it's finally time I admit abstinence is the way. I haven't drunk social for about 8 years now always on my own. I might be able to keep it to just reasonable levels for a month or 2. I go into to detox, have a break from the drink, lower my tolerance and drink 4 days a week, the just one might be kept to just 5 in the short run. It always ends up back to daily drinking.If I could describe my drinking over the past 10 years it would be like using tape to fix the holes in a leaking boat. I will read around more, I've not been to an AA meeting in years which would be a good thing, exercise and diet will play a role in my recovery. Sorry if i'm being selfish or not making sense.

Anna

I'm glad you've made the decision to live a sober life. The following link has information about recovery programs and ideas that helped us:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

Eastcoaster20

Your making total sense! . Happy to have you here. I tried to moderate for years too but it always snowballed into drinking during the day and hiding bottles from my husband to try and cover it up. Now that I'm sober and dedicated to not drinking again, I feel better physically and my anxiety is the lowest it's been for years. I still have cravings here and there but that's it, nothing worse than that. You can do it and you'll find so many incredibly supportive people here with great advice.

Harry02

So pissed off decided to drink more. I'm almost at the point where I might as well commit a crime to get help. I have partially funded the past 4 years my own detoxes. If I go to the government to get funded I would be lucky to receive a detox within 3 months. I've met people in detox units who committed crimes and don't give a **** about recovery getting weeks or months free of charge.

Dee74

Hi Harry

I couldn't get past 3 days either... but posting here every day, usually multiple times a day, really helped me turn things around.

Why not check out the April support thread? All you have to do to join is post

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-one-7.html

Its got to be better than more drinking or committing a crime- thats no solution.

why not tip out whats left and get some rest?

D

soberandhonest

Hi Harry.

When I read your posts, I see someone who accepts that he has a serious problem and is truly ready to quit. If so, it seems like you've already taken a huge step forward. If I could suggest one thing for you to do, it would be to sit down and write out a detailed plan for how precisely you are going to quit. Rather than viewing this from the prism of sheer willpower, examine it as an analytical exercise - what is the goal, how will I accomplish this goal and what tools can I make available to maximize likelihood of success.

In my humble opinion, success is closer than you think. I think you will succeed. Good luck.