grayghost1965

I'm proud of my journey, but I'm hesitant to talk about it to co-workers, many of whom drink (not to excess, as far as I know), but in our line of work, it's part of the culture. I have confided in two people, including my boss, so I figure that's all that I need to let know.

Fortunately, I don't have "work things" where alcohol is involved - I work my shift and go home.

This week, we have a new boss taking over - he's a retired police captain, and I will be upfront with him about what I'm doing. I hope he's receptive to it.

PhoenixJ

If you feel the need- good for you GG.

tomsteve

you may want to think hard about telling the boss about working on sobriety-check your motives on why. theres possible negative consequences that could come into play.

january161992

every line of work

every culture in human history

as alcoholics we are not rare

just in recovery

Berrybean

Why not get to know the new boss a bit before you open up to him with such personal information. He has no real need to know does he? He might turn out to be a blabber-mouth a-hole. No need to make that decision just yet.


I told my boss, but that was mostly because as a teacher I was worried that one of the parents might find out about me going to AA and tell her, and it was bugging me so much, with me looking over my shoulder and scrutinising every familiar face, that I decided I'd rather just tel, her myself. But I'd known her some time, and trust her (in that regard anyway). There was no need as it happens. It was pure paranoia on my part, and probably due to early sobriety anxiety.

Alan6154

Wait for him to ask. Should the question ever arise at a company function be open and honest. He'll understand, a little known secret about police officers is they have some of the highest alcoholism and divorce rates of any occupation. Think about their job, everyday they see people and humanity at their worst.

It would be hard not to bring that home with you after a while.

I would bet you are not the first co-worker He's had that was in recovery.

CreativeThinker

We had a driver who contracted with us, in a supervisory position who told us about his recovery. It didn't bother me in the least...in fact I respected him for his commitment to his recovery...but I'm an alcoholic...

Like some have suggested, you might want to get to know him before opening up too much.

FreeOwl

I felt the same at first. Over the years it shifted. To my surprise it has earned me a lot of respect and a few colleagues have come to me for help in their own drinking issues.

stargazer016

I may be the only one, but I am against telling bosses and most co workers. I feel that if you have any issues at your job, your boss will assume that you are drinking again. I have found that most normal people have a very poor view of alcoholics, believing that we are just weak willed people whom will eventually drink again and fail at the job because of it. Why put that prejudice in their heads? More often than not, your boss will mention your alcoholism to others and before you know it, everyone knows.

You don't need to tell your boss about your alcoholism. Your HR department, if your company is big enough to have one, will back that up. As someone mentioned, being retired police, I am sure that for better or worse, your new boss saw a lot of alcoholic work behavior over his career.

I only see possible negative consequences and few benefits to telling your new boss at the outset. Ultimately, only you can decide GG if you feel the need to unload on your incoming boss.

Maudcat

I agree that it is wise to tread carefully with regard to telling people in the workplace. Sometimes people have odd ideas about alcohol dependency that might not work in your favor, especially with bosses.
Good for you for wanting to be open about your recovery. I never told anyone in my workplace that I had stopped drinking, because frankly, I was afraid it might be used against me. My organization was ageist. When you got to a certain age and salary point, they found reasons to let you go. I showed them though. I retired! Lol.

Grymt

I don't get why people are cautioning you against telling whoever you think to tell. But that's me. I always search my motives when I have a contrarian opinion. Maybe it's cultural. Anyway. Whatever you choose to do has consequences. The aim here is to be and stay sober. Telling someone in an important position in a way binds you closer to your commitment. Then on the other hand if you need to use props like that perhaps question your commitment. I don't know. It's your call, always.

Anna

I can see no positive outcome from telling your boss or co-workers that you are an alcoholic. I can see many, many negative possibilities that could arise. For example, if you are late for work a couple of times, if you are sick with the flu, if you miss a deadline - what are the boss and co-workers likely to think?

Dee74

There's a lot of stigma about alcoholism and a lot of misrepresentation and misinformation.

Once you let that cat out of the bag there's no stuffing it back in.

I didn't need to let other people know in order for me to recover, but at the time I let everyone know...

on some level I did that because I wanted them to part carry my load for me and partly cos I wanted to be a special snowflake..

Neither of those reasons is a good one, lol

As long as all thats understood then the decision is up to the individual

D

Maudcat

But Dee. You ARE a special snowflake.
The specialest one evah.

FreeOwl

I should clarify my point earlier....

I've never told my boss or coworkers "I'm an alcoholic". That's the sort of discussion I reserve for AA meetings.

What I have become open with, however, is the fact that I choose sobriety for my life.

"I don't drink" is an openly-stated fact these days.

Sometimes, people inquire further and I'm honest. "well, I used to... but I've chosen sobriety. I like that way of living better." Simple, honest facts.

Nobody needs to know "I'm an alcoholic" especially when I don't always relate to that term myself. Nobody at work needs to view me as being "in recovery" or any of the connotations they may assign to that.

But - I'm perfectly happy to have people see me as a responsible, present, punctual, sharp, charismatic, insightful, reliable, honest, funny, enjoyable guy who doesn't drink.

And that has really only been a positive where work is concerned.

FreeOwl

it's kind of odd... it's like marketing in a way.

Tell people "I'm in recovery" or "I'm an alcoholic" - they frequently bristle and see you as something concerning or volatile. Like at any moment you might let them down.

Tell people "I don't drink anymore. I've found I really enjoy my life far more completely without alcohol" and they respect it and see you as a strong and admirable person.

The label we use does matter in human communication, and different messages work better for different audiences.

stargazer016

It really is marketing Free Owl!

A few months back, I applied for a life insurance policy. I told the agent honestly that I stopped drinking almost two years ago because "I wanted to live a healthier life." This qualified me for superb rates. Had I said that I am a recovering alcoholic, I doubt that I would have even gotten a policy.

It is all about the message we portray.

ThatWasTheOldMe

To be honest, I wish I would have quit when I realized I'm an alcoholic and told no one. It gives people an excuse to look down on you and judge you... and ultimately, if you're having an off day, people will just assume you're drinking again.

grayghost1965

I'm never late and have never called off, even when drinking - I'm kind of disappointed by the responses, but that's life.

grayghost1965

I'm not asking to be a snowflake or whatever else, but I believe in being honest, if it comes up. Being an alcoholic is not something to be ashamed of, and I'm proud of my recovery efforts thus far. I'm sorry, Dee74, if you've had negative experiences, but I'm proud of my recovery and if my new boss has a problem with it, that's his problem.