SoberNunn

I've been trying for sobriety for a few months and have cut down from everyday to once or twice a week. That means huge anxiety, despair and sense of failure twice a week. There has been some amazing support here and for that I'm grateful. I also feel there's been some judgement and feel I can't post anymore until I'm clean. I know ppl who relapse and are still in a dark place must be frustrating for those who have been sober for years.

Dee74

Please don't let shame keep you from posting.

SR is for people struggling

Maybe some of us are better communicating what we mean than others, but I guarantee every one here wants the same thing for you - recovery and happiness

The AV, our addiction - call it what you will - but it's really good to convincing us to walk away from support, for whatever reason.

Don't give in. Stay here.

If there's someone who really rubs you the wrong way use the ignore function

If you have issues with a particular post to you, you can always PM me or Anna or report the post by using the red and white triangle on that post

Noone wants to see you leave and it's certainly not required that you wait until you're sober to post again.

I'm interested to know what you've been doing for your recovery tho - maybe we can help you beef things up a little bit?

D

PhoenixJ

Please keep posting- it really is a great support. No judgement from me- I live in a glasshouse. Support to you, PJ

jacktryingagain

keep posting , you will get there eventually , dont isolate yourself

tufty13

Post away Sobernunn, SR is for everyone but it's especially for those that don't find getting sober easy.

Stay with us :-)

Mattq2

I think everyone expresses themselves in diffrent ways. I for one struggle putting my thoughts into written word.

We have all struggled, failed and then had to pick ourselves up again. Please keep posting, I know how important it is to me to have the support of SR. We are all here for you.

doggonecarl

You just started a thread for mums. You have to keep it going

Scruffanie

Stay with us SoberNunn. I don't think there are many of us who succeeded first try. My previous attempts saw me only last mere hours. The fact you are still here, posting, trying, not giving up speaks volumes of your desire to succeed. We want that for you too.

It is when we are in the dark that we need the light of others the most. Becoming sober, the struggle is real but not insurmountable with support.

I hope you'll stay on this forum. We all need each other xx

Nonsensical

Dee nails it.
My AV never wanted me to post here after I would drink and take a face plant somewhere. I have found that if my AV doesn't want me to do something there's about a 99.99% chance that it is the best thing for me to do.

And while cutting down wasn't your ultimate goal, don't minimize its significance. It might mean you have a day or 2 a week of feeling guilty, but it also means you have 5 or 6 of telling your addiction to stuff it.
You are getting there.
You can do this.

MrMcTell

SoberNunn,

I've been following your posts here and am sorry to here that you are struggling. Like Dee says, that is what this site is for. [No offence to the veterans, but SR would surely be a far less important place if it was just a club for those secure in their sobriety! ]

Looking back at my own experiences over the years, I think I can say that any attempt to isolate myself from help should have set alarm bells ringing. I came up with lots of "logical" reasons to reject seeking help and speaking about my problem, but I now think this was my addiction protecting itself from being properly confronted.

It took me weeks and weeks to get up the nerve to first post here, but being among people who understand this part of me has been really helpful.

I really hope you keep posting!

MrMcTell

Hey! That's what I was trying to say!

oakleaf82

Please keep posting! I've been on this forum for something like 7 years. I always disappeared when I started drinking again and was so embarrassed to admit it here. Some posts may come off harsh like you aren't doing enough, but folks are really trying to help you with your plan, and we want to see you succeed!

2ndhandrose

(((SoberNunn)))

Please don't stop posting. This community exists for all of us, no matter where we are in our journey.

When you are feeling discouraged and want to drop out is when you need SR the most.

Tonymblue

No judgement. Keep posting. Stay with us. You can do this.

Mizzuno

This is not the time to leave the community.
The struggle is real for many people and with clear thinking, I can say that no one is judging you. The newbies and the ones with steady sobriety have all been where you are. Please stay around and please continue to post sober or not.

columbus

Had a two-week relapse myself, SoberNunn, and am back on day one (and feeling good about it).

During my time "away" I stopped reading here and def. stopped posting.

Both of which, I now see, were a mistake.

I'm back, you come back too, okay?

Susiegirl

Nobody knows you here and no-one is going to judge you. We are all here for the same reason. Don't give up - just keep reading and posting. Just think how many alcohol free days you have had since trying to quit. I bet that far outweighs the amount had you not come on this site.
Good luck xx

Spartanman

SoberNunn, your post reminds me of me. I was drinking every day for a long time (years) and I really started trying to quit this past Fall. I was desperate to stay quit. I strung together some sober days, making a week, then drinking; a few days, then drinking; then two weeks; then binging for a week; then another week sober; then binging again, and on and on. I got to three weeks once and I thought I was finally going to make it, and then spent two days in the pub getting black-out drunk. So I have basically been trying and failing since November, over and over.

I'm on day three again today, and I'm trying to make this one "it."

One thing I recently realized is that I hadn't really "quit" those previous times but instead had just morphed into a weekly binger, rather than the daily binger I had been for years. I thought I was failing at quitting but I was really just creating a new pattern of drinking.

I don't know if that makes sense or if you can relate to that at all ... What I wanted to say is that throughout that time, posting here, I have received a lot of support and encouragement from members on this site; but I have also seen some posts that were really challenging to receive and that bruised my ego quite a bit. Looking at those posts I don't think I was being judged; I just think people have different interpersonal styles and ways of communicating. I believe that everyone on this site wants to help. Also, many members here know how difficult this is and have also been through the same experiencing of trying to quit for a long time before "getting it right."

I'm sorry you are feeling down and hope things look up soon. I hope you keep posting, I relate to your posts and it's good to know that I'm not the only one struggling through this. Also, I think feedback here is helpful and puts our minds in the right place as we try to keep on track.

Best wishes.

grayghost1965

Please don't mistake people being honest for being judgmental. Alcoholics have a hard time with honesty, especially when it comes to their own habit and behavior. Remember, almost everyone on here is an alcoholic/addict too, and we know of which we speak. Yes, some people will come across as judgmental because it's frustrating to see another of our number having such a problem, especially if a particular person is not experiencing difficulty at the time. Take care of YOU, after all, you came here for a reason.

ThatWasTheOldMe

Just commit to 24 hours at a time. "I will not drink today." It is this simple approach that has granted me 18 days sober now.

First it was: "Today, I will remain sober and if I do nothing else, that's okay."
Then gradually: "Today, I will remain sober and figure out what to do about getting Medicaid to back pay hospital bills."
Then it was: "Well, it feels good to accomplish something. Today I will remain sober and send out job applications."

And so forth. Everything starts with "Today I will remain sober." 24 hours, my friend.