libraloo

OK so I always liked a drink, thats not a problem! Started drinking in my teens at the weekend, got married young and started a family. Never drunk when I was pregnant. Moved to another country and thats when my ex and I started to drink more regularly. We moved to the suburbs from the country and suddenly there was a bottle shop just around the corner, just calling our names. Next thing you know we are drinking every night, but hey no problem right, so were all my friends and work colleagues. The marriage fell apart and divorce loomed in the air. Now I'm on my own , bored and trapped with the responsibility of bringing up children as a single parent and work commitments. My best friend was alcohol, he was always there for me at the end of the day. He consoled me, helped me sleep, to make irrational decisions, drunk text and mainly become a mean spirited, depressed individual. Jump a few years and I have lost 3 different relationships that meant a lot to me, the last being 6 months ago. I carried on drinking though, still looked at life in a negative manner that good old alcohol helped me see. I quit my job and left the state to start a new life. My friend came along with me in the form of a bottle of wine a day. I really wasn't embracing my new environment, but I wanted to change, I was sick of the hangovers, the incessant brain chatter, the shame. I read Gabrielle Bernstein's "The universe has your back" which impressed me, I then followed that with' spirit junkie' a new age book to help you find your inner guidance. She tells how she became sober and life became awesome. A voice in my head told me to do the same. It's been 5 days and luckily I've had no physical side affects and I am thinking clearer. Why oh why did I let my friend alcohol stay so long like an unwelcome visitor. Why was I blind to his other side. Like the early stages of a romance , I only saw what I wanted. I am going to go "no contact" with this unreasonable suitor. We have parted company. I will ignore his loving embraces and sweet talk. I know he will be back trying to woo me. Sweet Jesus help me to stay strong and ignore him. If only the brain had a block this contact.

PhoenixJ

Creed indeed LIBRA you title- reminded me of that song). Thanks for the good share. Welcome, keep posting. With support, PJ

Harryho

Yup, can relate. Generally wasted a whole 30 year otherwise promising career by mostly being hungover every day and too preoccupied with getting drunk. Last Day 15 again.

oakleaf82

Welcome!

Delilah1

Welcome to SR!

Dee74

Good to have you join us Libraloo

congrats on day 5

D

libraloo

Think I've been lucky with no physical symptoms, but the emotional side is coming out now. I feel weak mentally and emotionally. I never realized that alcohol destroyed dopamine, so I guess I will start to feel down and depressed. I refuse to go on anti-depressants. Been there before and they just make me flat, no emotions or feelings what so ever. Yes you can cope, but you dont care about anything. That's when the ugly voice says drink, at least you'll feel something. I will be ignoring that voice today. Maybe I'll just sleep for hours. I'm also obsessing about an old relationship. Is that part of the withdrawal?

joey112

I found obsessive thoughts were bad for a couple of weeks after giving up. I think that has to do with the messed up brain chemistry too. As things balance out, and you find more interests to occupy you, other than alcohol they should ease off.

libraloo

Maybe I was wrong about no physical side effects. Day 7 and I've had a stinking headache for 2 days. Plus couldn't sleep last night. Still awake @ 03.00 am. took to listening to hypnosis and meditations. Hope for a better sleep tonight

PhoenixJ

I would think seeing a doctor about the physical stuff is a logical step.

libraloo

Too difficult to visit a doctor at the moment. Very hard to get in with a doctor where I am . Got some OTC sleepers so that should help. Probably a caffeine headache as I'm drinking to much coffee to replace alcohol. Just added another addiction.

PhoenixJ

keep posting then. 10 times a day- 20, lots. Helps distract from pain for me.

libraloo

Has anyone tried the Craig Beck system for quitting drinking and does it work? I am re-reading alcohol lied to me and there is a link to this program. It seems expensive, but if it works it would be worth it

PhoenixJ

I have not heard of that onbe Lib. I use AA, SMART, SR- counsellor, GP and art. BUT I think the more strategies I collect along the way- if it helps, it does no harm to do new things.

libraloo

Tomorrow will be hard, My first test. We are going out for tea , so I guess everyone but me will be drinking. It's been easy so far as I haven't really left the house much and I'm ignoring the voice that's saying a drink would be nice. Filling my time with the computer and games is a distraction. Sitting watching everyone else drink, thats another ball game

libraloo

Did it. went to the pub for tea, No alcohol for me. Raspberry cordial instead. Just watched everyone else who was drunk , thinking that is usually me.Early days I know day 11.

PhoenixJ

Done4today

congrats on day 11!!!

You showed tremendous will power going to a pub. You can do this with that type of sheer strength.

libraloo

Is anyone else using hypnosis aps on their iPhone/ iPad? I have been using an ap called audiojoy, which is helping me feel way more positive. I discovered that the same company Pitashi have applications for addictions and AA big book audio and 12 step meditation daily , plus the AA 12 steps big book workshop. Has anyone tried these and are they any good

queenofheartz09

thank you for mentioning the books you've read, Ive been wanting some new reading material and will check them out, thanks !! Being sober is amazing, we can do this