Al31

Evening all.

Well my AV went crazy last night. I decided that I could have a maximum of 5 vodkas only and only on special occasions and Saturday nights.

I normally drink singles as I don't like the taste of vodka.

Anyway I ended up drinking 5 doubles and about 10 ish singles.

And I'm drinking again now.

I'm drinking now as a final good bye. I've been watching YouTube videos about drinking all day. There is no way I can drink 1 drink. Alcohol has to be eliminated from my life if I'm going to have a life

I'm sorry to everyone on here, whose been so supportive. I don't deserve your help.

I'm staying off here till I actually manage to get to day 15. I wish you all luck and love.

Steely

See you on Day 15 Great decision and insight.

thomas11

Everyone deserves help who wants help. Including you. I don't think you need to leave for 15 days. Stay here, get some support.

ljc267

No need to apologize or leave until....

Just keep at it and never give up.

Mattq2

I'm agree with Thomas. Everyone is diffrent but I think staying here, everyday will help you.

I think every alcoholic In the world figured they were cured the first time they had some sobriety. I know I did. Then we figure it out. We just can't drink anymore. Don't give up my friend

Delizadee

I would stick around It took me a while to get some decent sobriety under me, but leaving with our tail between our legs the support we need only perpetuates the guilt and shame we feel about the choice we've made.

And my one last farewell to drinking always turned into months of insanity trying to quit or control it, and not to mention numerous farewells. It's like that one bad friend that you just DO NOT want to leave behind while you're hanging around with them. Cause it'll cling to you as much as you do to it.

Don't leave, you can do this and you don't have to do this alone. Many of us have been there. We know- and you don't need to apologize.

Angie247

There's no need to apologize but I really hope that you stay and don't wait for 15 days. Posting and reading on SR has really helped me.

Grymt

Don't be ridiculous. When you're thinking clearly come back and post and ask for and accept help. There's no need to do this alone. In fact I think its not a good idea to do it alone at this point. Just dump the booze and commit to sobriety.

Delilah1

I'm sorry you are struggling. I found posting here daily really helpful, especially in the beginning.

I know you said you are saying goodbye to alcohol, if I were you I would pour out whatever I had left right now. Those goodbyes can pour into the next day, and so on after that.

Looking forward to seeing you on here.

You can do this.

Mountainmanbob

Hope to see you here on your sober day 15. You don't have to wait that long before your return but, that's up to you.

Good luck and you can do it.
M-Bob

Dee74

Hi Al

Like I said to you before...we've all been there.

This idea that you're not worthy to be here until you get to day 15 again is your inner addict trying to cut you off from support.

SR is for people struggling.


Keep posting.
Let us help you help yourself

First thing - dump whats left - you don't need to say a final goodbye, anymore than you need to say good bye to a bully or a situation you hate.

Your addiction doesn't deserve a good bye...just get the heck out of there and head for sobertown, Al.

D

Misc72

At least you are being proactive and watching the youtube videos on drinking. And you posted here about caving. That takes courage to fess up. No one here will judge you. We are all here because of the same struggles so I for one empathize with where you are..

IN2Q

I agree with this! This site wouldn't be here if everyone did it on their own, greater successes are made when your not alone, so please keep posting and keep reading.