Friend has passed
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Friend has passed
An old friend from my hometown passed away yesterday. He was not much older than me (early 40's). He was on the liver transplant list, and they passed him up b/c you have to be clean for a certain amount of time to deserve that liver, and he chose active drinking instead.
He literally drank himself to death.
It makes me sick. My youngest child came home early from her father's weekend b/c he just had to drink.
In this country, there is every opportunity to be clean if that is what you decide to do, and put your mind to. Instead, people let it get so out of hand that they literally die. I always hear loved ones on this forum hoping that their qualifier has found their "rock bottom." I always warn them that I don't think many addicts have a rock bottom. Addiction ebbs and flows, and kills.
He left behind a wonderful family including a son. It's absolutely devastating to them. His son is absolutely so confused, mad, abandoned, sad, it's just horrible. However, he was quite familiar with the Three C's thank goodness. No matter how hard they tried, they could not love him sober.
Just rambling I guess. My heart is heavy today.
He literally drank himself to death.
It makes me sick. My youngest child came home early from her father's weekend b/c he just had to drink.
In this country, there is every opportunity to be clean if that is what you decide to do, and put your mind to. Instead, people let it get so out of hand that they literally die. I always hear loved ones on this forum hoping that their qualifier has found their "rock bottom." I always warn them that I don't think many addicts have a rock bottom. Addiction ebbs and flows, and kills.
He left behind a wonderful family including a son. It's absolutely devastating to them. His son is absolutely so confused, mad, abandoned, sad, it's just horrible. However, he was quite familiar with the Three C's thank goodness. No matter how hard they tried, they could not love him sober.
Just rambling I guess. My heart is heavy today.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,663
Not rambling. My bro was 42 and drank himself to death. My dad died of booze related stuff. I nearly died from burns because of a ciggie- when I blacked out. No- not rambling. It sucks and you have my empathy, compassion and heartfelt support.
Keep posting. Greif will have it's day.
Keep posting. Greif will have it's day.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 6,262
In January my sister-in-law's brother was found dead in an abandoned trailer from alcoholism. His 93 year old mother said she'd given up on him years before and they'd had no contact for over a decade. Tragic and all too common an outcome from untreated alcoholism.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 430
Thanks for posting, Hopeful. I don't think you're rambling, and I think it's really important that these stories get told.
When I was trying to get my STBXAH to realize he had a problem, my friend pointed out that it was (and is) a life and death matter, so I should ignore his anger and try to help, like by calling his doctor to report what was going on.
I can't say it helped (you can't control it, etc.), but she had a point that it's those of us on the outside who see the damage.
When I was trying to get my STBXAH to realize he had a problem, my friend pointed out that it was (and is) a life and death matter, so I should ignore his anger and try to help, like by calling his doctor to report what was going on.
I can't say it helped (you can't control it, etc.), but she had a point that it's those of us on the outside who see the damage.
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