Ekohe

I still have a lot of issues in using evidence based thinking. I just turned 26 and have been a binge drinker since I was 18 with a few breaks here and there. I would drink anywhere from 8-12 beers in a sitting once or twice a week, usually ending in a blackout. I have a constant fear that I've done irreversible damage to my body, namely my heart. I have, since August 28th of last year had one slip in February. My therapist let me go in January, because I have been progressing well and for the most part I was fine until recently. My doctor tested me in November and everything was perfect regarding my blood tests, and bp. I have no desire to drink, I am just very exhausted with these thoughts and the symptoms that the anxiety causes. Thinking my one slip has grounds for my heart being damaged or at risk of stopping

Not sure what I'm looking for as an answer, just needed to vent. Health anxiety is a b$^%h.

Anna

Health anxiety is tough, but your dr has said everything is fine. Have you tried to deal with your anxiety with meditation and/or exercise? It might be helpful for you.

Ekohe

I do exercise often, and I go for long walks on the outdoor trails nearby. I am limited with weight lifting (I used to do that to burn a lot of stress) due to a shoulder and knee injury. I will have to give meditation a real go. Any recommendations on how to get started, Anna?

SoberNunn

you are so young. Many people binge drink in their early twenties as part of the culture where I live. I was only binging once or twice a week at that stage and didn't think I had a problem. A decade later and I'm binging everyday and now I know I have a problem. I really sympathise as I suffer from crippling health anxiety and am terrified of what I've done to my body but I really think you will be ok. Have you got a good doctor you feel comfortable going to see about your worries? They can run a ekg at most doctors offices (I've had that done too). It's highly unlikely there is anything wrong with your heart but getting reassurance might help your health anxiety. Big hugs I know what your going through x

Forward12

I use to deal with really bad health anxiety as well, and still deal with anxiety. I would highly suggest getting back into therapy and put on meds if needed.

BunRen

Can you pinpoint your anxiety? Try to find what you're anxious about. Come to terms with things that may be bothering you from your past. I've found that my anxiousness was just a learned reaction to many things I was dealing with since my abusive childhood. I was ALWAYS anxious, simply bcuz my life was chaos. When I was finally "Safe", I didn't know how to be calm. I then learned I was anxious for no reason. I had to meditate DAILY and CONSTANTLY calm myself with my own thoughts, writings, and bible. IDK if you're religious or not, but it really helps me to focus on the word of god.

Ekohe

Yeah, he has done all the tests in the book. From the 9 EKG's over the years, 2 echo-cardiograms, stress test, blood tests and the 48 hour monitor. All came back clean. Blood tests last November were excellent.

Ekohe

I contribute alot of it too my past, from 15-19 I was about 307lbs, drank tons of energy drinks, smoked cigarettes and ate like crap. I didn't have the anxiety then but after I quit smoking, dropped 120lbs and eat very healthy it went into overdrive. I've been keeping a journal and that seems to help somewhat.

daybyday13

Omg this post is so me. I also have health anxiety issues. I am still recovering from a 4 month long drinking 5-6 nights a week bender, I'm 29, this is my first time ever having a prolong drinking issue, before this I drank rarely. Like I said I also suffer from health anxiety, and the issue is that I Google alcohol addiction health complications and I read all this stuff about what can happen and I've had a few anxiety attacks from what I read. But at the same time, I am happy I've been active in researching the negative effects of alcohol dependence, because its opening my eyes. I have 2 brothers and a sister, both my parents, a beautiful niece. I cannot put my life in jeopardy because of alcohol, I could not do that to my family that I love so much. So I've been more conscious about my issue and I've been cutting down. I was at a my worst point a few weeks ago, I noticed I looked bloated and tired all the time. I knew it was time to kick this to the curb. I'm still drinking, but less, and being on here just a day has given me so much hope regarding this issue. I've doubled up on my water drinking and now taking multivitamins along with milk thistle (liver health) and b vitamins, fish oil. I am trying to prove to myself that things are much better when you're not going back to the bottle everyday. It's never too late to fix yourself and get yourself on the right track.

Grymt

Hi Ekohe, re meditation. Try this.



You can read something about this technique here:

meditation

and you can read a lot more here:

dhamma.org

daybyday13

^^ Ive started with meditation and I think its helping! I downloaded a few apps and one is a guided mediation app, I'll try this one tonight! Thank you. I think meditation is crucial because it strengthens the mind and the soul and thats what you need when you're going through all of this. Mind over matter, strengthen the mind and youll be able to put up a bigger fight against this.

Ekohe

Daybyday13, it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this, but am sorry you have to go through it too.

I've taken milk thistle on and off for the past few years, and take a complex B vitamin daily. It has helped a bit, but I need to try some new things as well, so thank you Grymt, I will try it now.

daybyday13

It's okay, we will both get through it. Being here is a good sign, it means you know you need to change, and you will.

Yes try meditation, clear your mind, let all negative thoughts go, also focus on your breathing, its all about your breathing, pay attention to your body, the sensations. I even take a melatonin now to let myself get sleepy. Melatonin is a natural sleep aid and I am all for it. I take a 10mg which is a big dose but for now its helping on nights when I am not so intoxicated. As you know once you cut down or stop, you're sure to have insomnia.

Melatonin also lowers blood pressure, which is another anxiety I have had. It's a natural way to get to sleep and also lower BP which can be an issue for drinkers.

I truly love this website, I feel like I am talking to myself. This is going to help so much.

Dee74

Hi Ekohe

The only two things that cured my health anxiety were not drinking at all, and time.

By 3 months the obsession lessened and by 6 it was gone.

If this is an ongoing obsession for you tho, maybe you need to see a therapist or counsellor?

D

PhoenixJ

Fear, exhaustion, anxiety, having issues-ASKING QUESTIONS.. For me- that would mean I would need professional guidance to help travel the path.

Ekohe

I have been with a therapist, from august till the end of January when he said I was better off trying to deal alone as he thought I may become dependent on him. It really was a whole lot better, until I binged February 23rd on my birthday. I have been knocking myself since then, and haven't been able to get over it which I believe has re-flared my anxieties.

PhoenixJ

Ekohe- what does your quiet voice tell you?

Alphabet

Looks like it was time to find a new therapist, anyway - what a dangerous attitude! Therapy shouldn't end just because you're "making progress". Yes, a lot of anxiety issues can wax and wane due to drinking, but just because you're doing better doesn't mean you're healed! My foster mom - a level headed, non-alcoholic woman who's seemingly very put together - always told me that any and everyone could benefit from seeing a therapist here and there. That attitude has been instilled in me, and I'd like to pass on that bit of advice to you, as well.

I'd also suggest you to try to find a therapist who not only specializes in addiction counseling, but CBT or DBT therapy, as well. I, too, suffer from rather severe anxiety, and I always joke in meetings (which personally REALLY helped me, I suggest giving it a real try, yourself!) that whenever I start feeling really anxious or unsure, I try to CBT it away, but we can only do so much on our own. Most often, it's helpful to sit and work things out with a professional, even if only twice a month.

Best of luck to you, and congrats on your progress! It's a feat, even if it doesn't seem like it right now

Dee74

I agree - it's weird you were 'let go' without a referral to another therapist.

Lots of people get attached or become overly dependent on their therapists - it's very common.

Cutting people adrift is not a solution IMO.

I hope you'll consider looking for a new therapist.

D