Jaddy21

Hey guys Im really in need of help here.
So im now 15 days clean. This time it was a drug called tianeptine, it acts as a tca antidepressant, and an opiate. So the withdrawals are double the fun. Anyways I am through the worst of it. But i find myself feeling 100% without purpose. I have a great job and continue to move up but no motivation or want, I just do it out of necessity to live and take care of my small family. I find myself curling up in bed still most days after work where the old me would want to take my girl out or go play ball or something, at least play video games... And its not that i even like laying in bed I just dont have the want to do anything at all, everything is forced. My question is does anyone else have this? Idk how to deal with it. I see a therapist and he doesn't offer much. Ive been looking for groups to go to with not alot of luck in my small town. Ive considered anti depressants but idk if they will help either. Im just running out of self power and know i need to take action, ive stayed active in church as of late too. I just hope this ends soon I just want to enjoy life sober

PhoenixJ

Jaddy- there is hope. Unfortunately it does not appear to meet our needs like the fairy god mother. You are asking- so you must know there is hope. Keep on- there is life, not just living. You need to work it out for your self. You have plenty of incentives by the sounds from your post. Keep on trying and hoping. Therapists are not god or mind readers. They are directed by in part what we put on the table. Prayers.

Jaddy21

Thank you for prayers and replying!
Yeah I think the key is time, and thats probably something I have never given my body. I always have caved and turned to drugs. As addicts we want instant gratification. I think i need to pay in time if i want to truly see happiness again.

Mentium

Jaddy - that 'lack of purpose' feeling - no energy, no interest in life and no motivation to do anything seems common to many post acute withdrawal experiences. The symptoms are akin to clinical depression.One possible explanation (I have been reading about of late) is that the brain chemistry which produces dopamine, the substance that is generated when we do natural feel good stuff (eating, sex, exercise etc.) has not kicked back in following the hijacking one's drug of choice has subjected it to.

The good news appears to be that the younger one is the quicker it is to recover. I'm an old guy and it is taking its time, but I'm getting there.

A little patience will see you right! In the mean time enjoy lots of sleep and relaxation and don't worry about it is my advice!

ReadyAtLast

There is hope. time heals. if you think we've spent years messing up our brains with drink and drugs it takes more than a few days for them to re-calibrate and start to 'feel' again. it does take time but it does get easier.

Congrats on 15 days. I have started gratitude and think of what i have got and what I'm thankful for each day - it really does help.

Gottalife

Jaddy, it sounds like what I have come to know as the spiritual malady. You seem to recognise a lack of power in yourself. I felt the same. I was medically diagnosed as a hopeless alcholic. Maybe, in addition to your church activity, something like NA could help you on your spritual path.

Mountainmanbob

This last time that I got clean and sober, I felt like I had lost all of my life's drive. Took months for me to get with a slightly normal active life once again.

Although I'm not big on it
exercise sure does help to get the blood flowing
and always makes me feel and think ( a little better).

Also -- getting good rest is important
although I can take that too far
always falling back on the thought of
as long as I'm not drinking or using it's alright to be lazy.

M-Bob

Ruby2

Jaddy, I'll just add my voice to the growing chorus. It does take time. Patience is hard to come by in the beginning but strive to find some. Fifteen days is great!

When I first quit it was hard just to put on my shoes and put one foot in front of the other to get out the door. I just kept trudging and gradually, the load lightened and things improved while I wasn't looking. Keep moving forward. You can do this.

MsCooterBrown

GottaLife WHO in the heck would ever diagnose someone as a hopeless alcoholic. God bless you for getting on track and proving that ********** wrong. No one..is EVER hopeless.
Jaddy21 my take on this is you can also lack motivation or be bored drunk as well. At least sober you have options to change the situation. When drinking I pretty much grounded myself to the house. Didn't want to drive drunk or go out and about in a drunken state! These things take time. Let yourself go thru the stages. Your drive will come back. You will be stronger than ever! Good job on 15 days. I blew my sobriety...and am starting over. You are one week ahead of me! We can go thru this together.

Jaddy21

Thank you all for so much support! It is nice to see im not the only one that struggled. I promise i will keep drudging on. I have no plan on stopping.

PhoenixJ

GOOD! Let's all drudge together.

Bobbieka

Jaddy21- It does get better. Anti-depressants have helped me a lot. Helps keep everything even. I had my doubts. Prayers.

Dee74

Welcome, Jaddy - the support here really helped me - Hope it will help you too

D

Nonsensical

Google "Anhedonia"
I was loaded with it. Mine was brought on by substance abuse, so it was temporary.

As for LOSING HOPE...well..."hope" isn't just a noun. It is also a verb.

Get after it.

Gottalife

I have to replyMCB. It was a number of very caring medical professionals who made that diagnosis over a period of time. They were honest enough to tell me that there is no medical solution for alcoholism when it has progressed as far as it had in me. They had tried everything and failed. They gave me six months.

There is no doubt in my mind I was absolutely hopeless, completely out of options, other than AA which I was sure would not work. I gave it a go. It is not like I had much else to do. It turns out being hopeless is a huge advantage, it meant I was open to a thing called a spiritual experience which completely changed my life, in fact gave me a whole new way of living.

I never did get on track, at least not my track. My life is so vastly different than anything I could have imagined. I cannot think of one single change I engineered myself.

The only thing I proved is that a little bit of willingness can be the start of a faith that really works, and that God has worked a miracle on me. I have not needed to drink in a very long time, almost in spite of my self.