The strength has arrived.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
The strength has arrived.
I have been focusing on myself, my children and my mother and I feel strong. That strength has been because I am not tying myself to his bad choices and decisions. My strength is in realizing this is not what I want for my children or myself.
I have realized I have an illusion of a marriage but not a marriage that I would have agreed to.
The children will go to counseling this coming week and I hope it goes smoothly but no one ever realizes the twists that life can give us. We can work our way through those events of life. I will listen to others and rely on help. I will protect my children and stand up for myself and my needs.
The sun is bright today but even if it wasn't I will look forward to the bright sun of tomarrow.
I have realized I have an illusion of a marriage but not a marriage that I would have agreed to.
The children will go to counseling this coming week and I hope it goes smoothly but no one ever realizes the twists that life can give us. We can work our way through those events of life. I will listen to others and rely on help. I will protect my children and stand up for myself and my needs.
The sun is bright today but even if it wasn't I will look forward to the bright sun of tomarrow.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
Ot
My mother had a bad day yesterday. I was there twice. H asked what I have to be sad about. I don't expect or want him to be there for me.
I need someone to be there for me. I need a hug and compassion. I need " you're awesome". Those are items I have to give myself and believe it. I can take care of myself.
When life gets tough I can get busy. I can go for a walk. The children distract me from the tough times. I can pray.
I need someone to be there for me. I need a hug and compassion. I need " you're awesome". Those are items I have to give myself and believe it. I can take care of myself.
When life gets tough I can get busy. I can go for a walk. The children distract me from the tough times. I can pray.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Hearthealth, I have been where you are, with my own mother...and, needless to say, my heart goes completely out to you!! yes, you need human co mpassion, right now, more than ever...
What he said is a very cruel thing to say...and, I hope that you will mark this in your memory...and, never, again, doubt that you need this kind of crap out of your l ife.....
Those of us, who have been there DO understand.....
What he said is a very cruel thing to say...and, I hope that you will mark this in your memory...and, never, again, doubt that you need this kind of crap out of your l ife.....
Those of us, who have been there DO understand.....
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,235
hearthealth, as a caretaker myself, I know how hard it can be. It's such a tough road, with such incredible highs and lows. I treasure the highs knowing the lows will eventually arrive.
One time, after a particularly troubling episode with my mom, (she threatened suicide after she decided to drop her anti-depressants. Her oncology nurse, her social worker, and I convinced my dad to drive her over to the hospital..) I called my sister to let her know that she was admitting herself to the ER. I was crying my eyes out and my sister said to me, "I'm sorry, but I can't help but start laughing." I still remember the coldness in her voice and it still chills me to this day.
It's amazing how drugs and alcohol can create this mindset that just eradicates all compassion from the addict. When my sister said those words, I knew I was done.
One time, after a particularly troubling episode with my mom, (she threatened suicide after she decided to drop her anti-depressants. Her oncology nurse, her social worker, and I convinced my dad to drive her over to the hospital..) I called my sister to let her know that she was admitting herself to the ER. I was crying my eyes out and my sister said to me, "I'm sorry, but I can't help but start laughing." I still remember the coldness in her voice and it still chills me to this day.
It's amazing how drugs and alcohol can create this mindset that just eradicates all compassion from the addict. When my sister said those words, I knew I was done.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Originally Posted by Ariesagain 
Those words should steel your spine if you start to second-guess.
I agree. It reminds me of another favorite quote: "Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be" (Clementine Paddleford)
I'm so sorry to hear about your mom, but great job on staying strong & focused on you & your kids!
Calling the family together.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
