Back again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 48
Back again
Hi
It's a long time since I posted on here. I'm back again feeling desperate because I've finally realised there are only two ways this thing goes - complete sobriety or the alternative. I'm starting to get a few worrying physical symptoms and I understand what the alternative is. I have two young boys who love me and need me yet I'm so selfish I put drink before them. I'm terrified
It's a long time since I posted on here. I'm back again feeling desperate because I've finally realised there are only two ways this thing goes - complete sobriety or the alternative. I'm starting to get a few worrying physical symptoms and I understand what the alternative is. I have two young boys who love me and need me yet I'm so selfish I put drink before them. I'm terrified
Do you have a plan?Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 48
I'm trying to make a plan - I need to look at some of the threads on here about how to do this
I started to see a counsellor about other issues but have not been honest with her about the full extent of my problems with alcohol. I plan to tell her at my next session
I've never been to AA but will try to go this evening. I'd like to explore some alternatives to AA and I know there's lots of info about that on here - I need to spend some time reading
That's as far as I got.
I started to see a counsellor about other issues but have not been honest with her about the full extent of my problems with alcohol. I plan to tell her at my next session
I've never been to AA but will try to go this evening. I'd like to explore some alternatives to AA and I know there's lots of info about that on here - I need to spend some time reading
That's as far as I got.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 732
I like you realised the same thing a few years ago and tried to stop numerous times.
The mistake I made was as Dee says - a plan. I was too scared to tell my GP, I didn't want it on my records. I was too,ashamed to tell family and friends. Anyway six years later my health finally began to suffer and my daughter was having to make herself pot noodles for her tea. I wasn't doing my job properly.
So I came clean to my daughters dad, my brother and my GP. They were so concerned and caring. The Dr referred me to the relevant support services and my brother made sure I attended all of them and also accompanied me.
My advice to you would be come clean, don't try on your own. I didn't take that advice when I first posted on here and believe me it gets worse.
Good on you for acknowledging your problem it's the best first step im sure you can do this.
The mistake I made was as Dee says - a plan. I was too scared to tell my GP, I didn't want it on my records. I was too,ashamed to tell family and friends. Anyway six years later my health finally began to suffer and my daughter was having to make herself pot noodles for her tea. I wasn't doing my job properly.
So I came clean to my daughters dad, my brother and my GP. They were so concerned and caring. The Dr referred me to the relevant support services and my brother made sure I attended all of them and also accompanied me.
My advice to you would be come clean, don't try on your own. I didn't take that advice when I first posted on here and believe me it gets worse.
Good on you for acknowledging your problem it's the best first step im sure you can do this.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,657
Hello. Addiction sucks. I cannot offer advice. You say you want to stop drinking and you have 2 sons. You have to stop drinking -for you. If you do not- you may suffer my plight, which I would not wish on any. I give you my prayers and support.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hey JUK
Welcome back.
I am learning that complete honesty is a major part of the foundation of my recovery. That doesn't mean I announce to the world my alcoholism. It means that, in recovery (with my spouse, partner, counselor, sponsor etc) I am totally honest with myself and those that are to support me. I am not naturally honest....that's not something I'm proud of . And I'm an expert in denial and justification. That stuff just keeps me feeling shame/guilt, which eventually leads me back to drinking.
You can do this.
Welcome back.
I am learning that complete honesty is a major part of the foundation of my recovery. That doesn't mean I announce to the world my alcoholism. It means that, in recovery (with my spouse, partner, counselor, sponsor etc) I am totally honest with myself and those that are to support me. I am not naturally honest....that's not something I'm proud of . And I'm an expert in denial and justification. That stuff just keeps me feeling shame/guilt, which eventually leads me back to drinking.
You can do this.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Originally Posted by JUK 
I'm trying to make a plan - I need to look at some of the threads on here about how to do this
I started to see a counsellor about other issues but have not been honest with her about the full extent of my problems with alcohol. I plan to tell her at my next session
I've never been to AA but will try to go this evening. I'd like to explore some alternatives to AA and I know there's lots of info about that on here - I need to spend some time reading
That's as far as I got.
I started to see a counsellor about other issues but have not been honest with her about the full extent of my problems with alcohol. I plan to tell her at my next session
I've never been to AA but will try to go this evening. I'd like to explore some alternatives to AA and I know there's lots of info about that on here - I need to spend some time reading
That's as far as I got.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post3842631
Making a recovery plan
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 48
Thanks everyone for your replies and thanks Dee for the links. Went to my first AA meeting yesterday - I was completely surprised and quite overwhelmed. There are quite a few in my area so I'm trying to put together a schedule
I know I need to see my doctor. I've been putting it off but I discovered that the odd pains I've been having in my left arm - which I just discounted - could be a sign of something serious. I'm **** scared. Did anyone else have those?
At the same time I'm scared, like Daisy said, of it going on my record and who could get access to it. It could effect whether my family gets life insurance money and things like that.
I know I need to see my doctor. I've been putting it off but I discovered that the odd pains I've been having in my left arm - which I just discounted - could be a sign of something serious. I'm **** scared. Did anyone else have those?
At the same time I'm scared, like Daisy said, of it going on my record and who could get access to it. It could effect whether my family gets life insurance money and things like that.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
Welcome back! Dee's links are good ones, read through and see what works for you. The 24 hour thread and monthly classes are both great support systems as well, you will meet lots of great people.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 48
Just had a really frank conversation with my wife and am beginning to see the enormity of damage I have done to my family. She was asking if there was any way she could get support - she tells me she has felt so alone these last few years and has been unable to speak to anyone about it. Are there online groups for her to get support?
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Originally Posted by JUK
Terrified but know I need to get it checked out - most likely candidate is angina. I'm 49 - I thought you got angina when you were 80 - guess that's the toll it can take
One word that I switched out was "try" - I had to "do." I started AA and made about 82 meetings in 90 days; I went, I didn't try to fit it into my schedule. I didn't drink; I slept, ate, hydrated, repeat. Etc etc in every area of my life where I could take action, not just hope or think about doing.
You can do it. Hope to see you around- it is absolutely better on this side.
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