Centered3

I recently noticed a couple of things about Step 3 in the big book that I've never noticed before.

First of all, the actual 12 steps are not listed in the big book until the Step 3 chapter, since that's the chapter that is called "How it Works". This just reminds me that you can't really "work" Step 1 and 2 or understand them until afterward.

Secondly, I noticed "we are at Step Three" is written in two separate places in this chapter! This confuses me. Does anyone have an idea why this is?

First on page 60, it says after the a,b,c (IMHO the most important part of the book) "Being convinced, we were at Step Three..."

But then on page 63, it says "We were now at Step Three", and then the third step prayer follows that.

Why are we "at step three" twice?

BrendaChenowyth

May have something to do with it being the first of the action steps, as the 12&12 calls it. Sometimes steps one and two just happen.

tomsteve

why does it say it twice? i dont know, but the first one, after,explains why step 3.
secone explains how.

good to read ya readin and studying, centered!

Centered3

Thanks tomsteve!

I've read this step hundreds of times at my step meeting but I never noticed this. I like your reasoning--"why" and "how". Thank you. :-)

Gottalife

The part of chapter five we read at meetings is the introduction to step 3. If the reader accepts the abcs, then they have taken the first two steps, identifying the problem and choosing the spiritual solution. (Being convinced of the abcs)

The first we are at step three goes into the reasons why we should go into this process. We are invited to compare our experience of managing our own lives. When we are convinced, we are at the second we are now at step thre, the direction, or how to take it. Next come the step three promises and the admonition that unless we take step four at once (action on step four is the only feasible proof that we have taken step three) we are likely to come unstuck.

When climbing a ladder (the steps) you usually have a hand hold to keep you from falling off. The step three hand hold is missing. The only way to stay on the ladder is to reach a bit higher and grab the forth step hand hold.

Centered3

Step 3 isn't an action step. It's a "decision". So unless you consider a decision to be an action, it's really not an action step. The action starts at the word "Next".

Centered3

Sort of like we're "at" Step 3 when we are convinced of the abcs and then when we say the 3rd step prayer, we've "done" the 3rd step?

This is helpful.

Love this!!

I'm surprised Bill W didn't write "Faith without works is dead" between Step 3 and Step 4.

August252015

What Gottalife said, exactly.

And- I do believe that a decision is an action. We decide not to drink; we choose the act of not drinking. In AA we talk about a plan of action and its root is in choosing not to drink because of specific reasons (see, step 1) and its ongoing support/continuance is in the steps that follow.

I can't get too bogged down in why all of the language is what it is- my sponsor guided me through the book through "Into Action" - and that's part of why I focus on reading 85-88 every day - note that these pages talk about things like consciously turning our will and thoughts over to God, continuously - again, decision and action.

Just how this all makes sense to me.

stevieg46

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To me without going into page numbers page 60 , we were at step 3 ''not we are at step 3 '' meaning we have taken steps 1 and 2 .

We took 1 and 2 which convinced us of our powerlessness and the the need for a Higher Power ''we were now at Step 3 (even or maybe unknowingly through serious reading and contemplation we took 1 and 2 . ?) For me it was more than a decision its when I made conscious contact which removed all fear and replaced it with faith . Faith made me fearless and thorough in taking 4 , and fearless in sharing the exact nature . I came to believe in Step 3 , after nearly 34 years after I made the decision after discovering the kingdom of God is within , I then had a massive spiritual experience after 3 , which enabled me to trust in God forgive myself and others which carried me through the rest of the steps .I believe I''unknowingly took these first 5 steps in the Oxford fashion '' it was as if I had entered the world of the spirit
That's why I claim for me it was much more than a decision ''but my experience has to be experienced ''although I fully understand others are different . ( WE ARE NOW AT STEP 3) , WE WERE AT STEP 3

Stevie recovered 12 03 2006

sugarbear1

My sponsor suggested I was on step 3 when I made a commitment / date and time to meet for step 5.

Confusing? Yes, without a sponsor I can see this and while working with a sponsor I can see this......

It's all about the work we do and the experience(s) we have, not about understanding things....

Centered3

Step 5? Is that a typo? lol. I was on Step 3 when I started writing Step 4. The first word between step 3 and step 4 in the big book is "Next".

"Next", "At Once" - when we put pen to paper and started writing step 4, we were consummating Step 3.

I didn't want to do the work to write Step 4, but it was the first step I made to take action in turning my life over to care and protection of God.

I agree and love this:

Centered3

Well all I know is, I made a great deal of "decisions" in my life without following through on the action.

I love the AA story of this: "There are three frogs are on a log. Each makes a decision to jump off the log. How many frogs are left?

Three! All they did was make a "decision"! ;-)

Again in my experience, "choosing" not to drink did nothing for me. I had to take the action of the steps 4-12.

84-88 are action steps 10 & 11 ;-)

Centered3

Ah-ha!! Thank you Stevie. I got it now. Being convinced of the a,b,c's is basically step 1 and 2 so now once convinced we are "at" Step 3.

thanks Stevie this makes perfect sense.

I sort of view Step 3 as my decision to make a "leap of faith" but not actually taking the leap until I sat down with pen and paper to write Step 4.

Now I get why it's written like that. First we make a decision, (we're AT step 3) being convinced of a,b,c. Then we say the 3rd step prayer (so we TAKE step 3) and we consummate the 3rd step prayer/3rd step by beginning to write Step 4 immediately.

Looking back I so understand this quote now: "Faith is taking the first step even when you can't see the whole staircase."

Tommyh

step 3 requirement
first off I had to put in a effort to stop playing God
that took a decision and some action
it also took surrender

sugarbear1

If I make a commitment for step 5, that also means I have made a commitment to write my step 4 and then meet my commitment for step 5. Same as "being" on step 4. My sponsor gives me one day/night to write my 4th step (the night before my early morning meeting for step 5).

Centered3

Good points, Tommy!!

dsmaxis10

What I learned after four years sobriety and four years of habitual relapsing. This is something I'm gonna have to do everyday for the rest of my life.

DayTrader

Ahhh...... I like that. Not just "you've done 3 when you start to write 4" but taking it to another level by setting a date from the beginning re. how long the sponsee has to work the 4th step.

As I've done myself and heard from more than a couple experienced sponsors with decades of newcomers under their belts, "you know you could give them 2 weeks, two months and two weeks, or two years and two weeks......they won't start writing till the last 2 weeks anyway." lol

Centered3

Thanks for explaining that, DayTrader. I hadn't understood what that meant and now I do. :-)

I think in my home group I took the longest to get to my 5th step because I kept starting and stopping with my writing. Which as I see now, meant I had to redo Step 3 all the time... So yeah Sugarbear you're right--I didn't really do Step 3 till I was on step 5 and actually had finished writing, not just starting!