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Very briefly: still not dead!

Old 01-17-2017, 05:52 PM
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Very briefly: still not dead!

Fairly amazing, considering abuse since last post; when I leave this place, I do it vigourously, and I'm always shocked at my continued survival. Whether that speaks to my rock-hard constitution, or the power of hope, I only know this: when things get that bad, I keep coming back here...and here you all are! It's quite miraculous, really...

Love and junk,
Arp
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Old 01-17-2017, 06:15 PM
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Well.....
glad you haven't caked it just yet mate.

Tho I guess we won't be expecting an announcement of the memorial service.

C'mon dude....why?
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Old 01-17-2017, 06:16 PM
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I remember you, Arpeggioh. I'm glad you're not dead. Let's not drink tomorrow, me and you both.
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Old 01-17-2017, 06:17 PM
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I used to be like that.... macho...proud of my mortal frame's ability to take massive amounts of abuse. I'd brag about it.

Now I know that it's nothing to be proud of.
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Old 01-17-2017, 06:22 PM
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Always glad to see you, Arp - but I wish you'd take better care of yourself.
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Old 01-17-2017, 06:57 PM
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Well I guess God loves you til you can love yourself. Glad you're alive.
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Old 01-17-2017, 09:33 PM
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Hope you will stick around, and stay sober.
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Old 01-17-2017, 10:13 PM
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Hey, Arp. Glad to hear you're not dead. Sorry to hear that you've been drinking so much. Maybe stick close to SR for a while? It's gotta be better than the alternative?
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Old 01-17-2017, 10:44 PM
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Originally Posted by Arpeggioh View Post
Fairly amazing, considering abuse since last post; when I leave this place, I do it vigourously, and I'm always shocked at my continued survival. Whether that speaks to my rock-hard constitution, or the power of hope, I only know this: when things get that bad, I keep coming back here...and here you all are! It's quite miraculous, really...

Love and junk,
Arp
Dang I thought this was going to be a good update Arp.

Take it from me - you can't be made of titanium and wrapped in teflon forever.

Make a list of all the things you love...that's a list of all the things you risk losing if you continue to drink.

I know what kept me drinking, pride - I didn't want to be different and I didn't want to be beaten - and fear - I didn't know how to live sober or who I;d be.

Neither of those are good enough reasons to pee your life away.

whats keeping you drinking, man?
D
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Old 01-18-2017, 02:25 AM
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Arpeggioh,

That used to be me too. I ve often been the one man standing in the room, I d always have one more glass, one more line, one more pill, you name it.

Body always kept going fairly unharmed, but what I do realise now is I was a shadow of the person I can be and that it was all pure madness, that was going to kill me at some point.

You know you need to stop this, mate, I guarantee it will make you happier.

P
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Old 01-18-2017, 02:41 AM
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Originally Posted by Outonthetiles View Post
I used to be like that.... macho...proud of my mortal frame's ability to take massive amounts of abuse. I'd brag about it.

Now I know that it's nothing to be proud of.
Whew, me too. (Joke, if not brag, about it) I definitely put myself through hell's wringer. Somehow came out this side...but I know I don't have any more chances in me.

Arp, glad you came back- that you do every now and then- and I hope you stop taking chances.
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Old 01-18-2017, 07:23 AM
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You're not dead... yet. But who knows what can happen if you keep drinking.
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Old 01-18-2017, 07:51 AM
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I had a close friend who would brag about how his liver was titanium and he was impenetrable.... it did not turn out very well for him! ☠️
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Old 01-18-2017, 10:10 AM
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I used to think my body was tough and amazing despite how much I was drinking . two weeks ago it gave up I was rushed to hospital with kidney failure (now resolved it was dehydration) but my ultrasound has I unfortunately shown cirrhosis in my liver. I am 45. I was fine and my body just suddenly gave up. Please please be careful
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Old 01-18-2017, 10:19 AM
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Originally Posted by Arpeggioh View Post
when I leave this place, I do it vigourously, and I'm always shocked at my continued survival.
don't leave this place! I am glad you are okay. welcome back!
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Old 01-18-2017, 11:10 AM
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Originally Posted by Arpeggioh View Post
... I'm always shocked at my continued survival... It's quite miraculous, really...
I had a rock hard constitution, which allowed me to drink and smoke insane amounts, compared to many others. My body would simply adapt and survive, as it were, but I wish I never had that blessing. These days, I am broken physically, and I am being tested, but all I want is to heal.

I regret abusing my body and mind for so long, while everything was still healthy. There were so many wasted years, which I know you can understand, Arpeggioh. Lately, I have this crazy inclination to "save" others from similar mistakes, which is not healthy for me, so I'll just leave you with your own words:

Over ten years on SR -

Originally Posted by Arpeggioh View Post
My very supportive, patient (with me especially), worried Dad has always said:

Never Quit Quitting!

I will never simply surrender myself to an early, ugly death at the gripping hands of alcohol...not ever!
Take stronger action.
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Old 01-18-2017, 11:59 AM
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Welcome back Arp!
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Old 01-18-2017, 12:20 PM
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Old 01-18-2017, 03:14 PM
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Hoping you'll be back to talk things over, Arp.
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Old 01-18-2017, 03:40 PM
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One thing that was said to me in my very first recovery discussion was 'if you are still able to do/keep a complex job, hold down a family and kids and still live a life, imagine how good you could be without the anchor around your neck that is alcohol'

You have an opportunity to be a vastly improved version of yourself! I say take it!
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