My husband quit too!!
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 500
My husband quit too!!
Ok, I don't want to be too excited about this but I really hope it sticks. Last time I quit (for around 20 months+) a couple of years ago my husband continued to drink and heavily. Needless to say things were not good between us. But now he is right on board with me and I don't want to jinx it but things are really good. He has been sober for over a week and he seems fine. In fact this morning he was telling me he loves the fact that he has more energy. I am hoping this is a new beginning for us as a couple.
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Carolina
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I could have written that post! My husband and I drank nightly for more years than I care to admit. I've quit for extended periods over the years but he never has tried. We both quit 11 days ago and he says the same thing about his energy.
I hope it sticks for all of us but I've promised myself that if he fails (God willing he won't!) it will not affect my sobriety...withdrawals this time were no joke and I am NOT going through that again!
Best wishes for both of you!!
I hope it sticks for all of us but I've promised myself that if he fails (God willing he won't!) it will not affect my sobriety...withdrawals this time were no joke and I am NOT going through that again!
Best wishes for both of you!!
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Canada
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I tried to write earlier and it wasn't taking my posts. I am just checking , ah ok it is working. Munchkin that is great news. Please keep in touch and let me know how the both of you are doing. So far so good. My husband makes it look like a breeze where I feel emotionally all over the place. Both times I quit I began the process of a new diet and tapering. My husband however, just stopped. No withdrawals anything and he seems fine. It's so odd. He used to drink quite a bit of bourbon too. just sayin...
Thing is if he starts I wouldn't start again. I have been used to being sober around him for years really. It has never been him that influenced me. I do, however connect with him better when we are both sober, it's really nice.
Thing is if he starts I wouldn't start again. I have been used to being sober around him for years really. It has never been him that influenced me. I do, however connect with him better when we are both sober, it's really nice.
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Join Date: Feb 2016
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That's fantastic. This may be controversial, but I think that both partners have to be on board for sobriety to really work, at least at first. When one partner is drinking heavily and the other doesn't want to drink and can't be around drinkers, something has to give.
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Hi Out, I don't think it is controversial at all. I have been surrounded by all sorts of drinkers my entire life. My parents are huge drinkers. My mom is worse than my father who seems to make tea after a couple. She usually drinks herself into a stupor. Most all of my friends drink but never as much as I did. I was thinking of leaving my husband when he continued to drink. He was not on the same wave length as me. But then he quit for a while too and we got back on track. I don't think we could continue our marriage if he went back to drinking heavily. We still have loads of alcohol in the house once I made up my mind I just stopped. Same with him. Somehow with him, his drinking although it was heavy at times it wasn't the same as mine. I really feel like with me it's a genetic component that really tells me I can't drink.
He hasn't said he was quitting forever. He just said he wasn't drinking anymore. If he starts again is where I am going to have to have a conversation because if it goes back to how it was a few years ago I cannot put up with it. I do however have no problem hanging out with friends that drink. No one really gets drunk anymore. They aren't alcoholics. So for the most part the parties are easy and people are still really interesting to talk to.
He hasn't said he was quitting forever. He just said he wasn't drinking anymore. If he starts again is where I am going to have to have a conversation because if it goes back to how it was a few years ago I cannot put up with it. I do however have no problem hanging out with friends that drink. No one really gets drunk anymore. They aren't alcoholics. So for the most part the parties are easy and people are still really interesting to talk to.
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 115
Our stories sound really similar, Cusper. My husband poured out his rum 12 days ago and the only withdrawal he seems to have suffered was trouble sleeping the first few nights. I've quit many times and never had withdrawal until this time. I'm afraid it will only get worse if I fail again...
I know it would be difficult for me to stay sober if he starts drinking again...very difficult but I've promised myself I won't do it. I will die if I stay on this road.
I'll be thinking of you and your husband as we all try to figure this out! :-)
Please do keep in touch, maybe we can lean a bit on each other?
I know it would be difficult for me to stay sober if he starts drinking again...very difficult but I've promised myself I won't do it. I will die if I stay on this road.
I'll be thinking of you and your husband as we all try to figure this out! :-)
Please do keep in touch, maybe we can lean a bit on each other?
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Wareham, Mass
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Hi Cusper and Munchkin and all. When I decided to become sober almost 4 years ago, my husband, to show solidarity, stopped as well. He was a normal drinker, unlike myself. I shall be forever grateful for his gesture. It really did help. Peace.
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Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Greensboro, NC
Posts: 94
I can relate.I have quit several times over the years - my husband never. This time I was determined to do it with or without him. He has also quit, and our marriage hasn't been this good in years! We love and care about each other again, compliment each other on how proud we are of each other, etc.........
I also think it's very important for a couple to do it together, but I am done with alcohol regardless of his outcome.
Good luck to you and your husband .
I also think it's very important for a couple to do it together, but I am done with alcohol regardless of his outcome.
Good luck to you and your husband .
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Hi Munchkin! just sent you a private message. I didn't see this until now. Sadly my husband drank the other night. two nights ago. He got a bit drunk but not terribly. still, I knew not to hold my breath. Jillwink that is such good news please keep in touch and let me know how both of you are doing.
Maudcat that is great that he quit with you. In my readings last year one of the books where a man quit drinking pointed out that most marriages don't last if one partner continues to drink and the other has quit. I hope my husband just had a slip. We will see as time goes on. He didn't drink last night so we'll see....
Maudcat that is great that he quit with you. In my readings last year one of the books where a man quit drinking pointed out that most marriages don't last if one partner continues to drink and the other has quit. I hope my husband just had a slip. We will see as time goes on. He didn't drink last night so we'll see....
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Thank you Least. I've made up my mind. My husband drank almost the whole 20 months last time. Actually he gave up for about 2 months of that. He doesn't influence me in that way. I took that option off the table. He isn't drinking tonight, nor did he last night. If it becomes a regular thing we are going to have talk it out. I won't go back to the way it was.
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