myfdeserveit

7 days sober then I slipped last night. Not a bender by any means but I still drank alcohol. I feel pretty stupid to be honest as it did nothing for me and I didn't enjoy it. If anything in fact it reminded me why being sober is better.

So trying to put a positive on things (because thats just what I do) I think its strengthened my resolve to stay sober.

I had a job offer the other day, just done via a conversation, nothing official yet but the deal I was offered included a nice German car. So today I am off to the showroom to sit in one and remind myself that if I dont keep my head together I may well mess up this opportunity. Then I'm taking my wife out for lunch - I never want to drink with a full stomach.

Anyone have any other advice? Anything I can use to reinforce the message to myself that sober is better would be appreciated

SnazzyDresser

Hi, myfdeserveit. I see you have 2 posts in the December class thread since Dec. 4. I guess my advice is to post in there every day at least once to keep you on the right track, or just more time reading posts here is good too. For me, time spent here at SR is positively correlated to strengthened sobriety. And get back at it quick, back in the sober days habit. That's the habit to have.

Dee74

My advice is to make a plan myfdeserveit

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Fortress

If you get right back in the sober swing, then all the things you learned in the 7days will still be fresh and helpful...

nmd

I've written this very same post. The "I relapsed but it wasn't that bad and I learned from it" post.

As Dee said, make a plan. And plan as if it is your last plan. Not the last because "if this doesn't work I'm going back to drinking", but because "this is the plan that will help me stop drinking for good". Plan to succeed. Anything that might lead to drinking needs to go, at least temporarily until you have more sober time. Later you can decide if those things are important.

If you mess up, just get back up revise your plan and try again. (But be careful you don't plan to drink....) I've done it many times. Stick with us and keep trying :-)

FreeOwl

Advice?

Choose SOBRIETY now ando act to support and honor that choice every day.

This only gets worse, harder, more painful.

But if you choose sobriety and act on that choice each day..... life just gets better and better and better

doggonecarl

I drank two weeks after vowing never to drink again.

What did I learn? Two things. 1) That my problem was worse than I thought.

2) That sobriety is not just a decision, it's a course of action.

Action.

Like FreeOwl said, do what you need to support your decision to quit drinking. Otherwise, what you'll do is drink.

fini

yes; my advice is to spend time dissecting the idea that drinking again and not enjoying it strengthens the resolve.
best to not have resolve rely on drinking again to shore it up, yes?
also: what if you decide to strengthen your resolve again by having a few drinks and it turns out you enjoy it that time? then what?

i'd suggest strengthening by implementing other actions. check out what others have done/are doing instead of strengthening resolve by drinking again. see what makes sense to you about what they're doing and do that.

lots of support here.

Ariesagain

Okay, so I can't find a horse smilie, but here's your ride, now hop back up?

Spartanman

I'm not in a position to offer advice as I'm only on day 3, but I just wanted to offer a word of encouragement. Sounds like you've got a lot of positive things happening, glad to hear that.

Also, do you know why you picked up after 7 days sober ? Did something trigger it, was it an autopilot moment, was there something leading up to that first drink? I have been reading on strategies for dealing with such moments / thoughts ahead of time and having a plan to stay on track when they crop up. I am optimistic that it's going to make the difference for me this time. Also I know if I started up today with "just one" I could easily screw up everything in my life. I have so many obvious reasons to stay sober, just was never able to for very long.

Anna

My advice is to plan, plan and plan. What led you to decide to drink? How can you avoid that in the future? Being self-aware will help you in this journey. Good luck with the job offer.

EndGameNYC

Yeah, so, everyone has pretty much advised you to make a plan, to do things that will help you to stay sober besides willing yourself not to drink. What else are you going to do?

You get out of the hospital following major surgery, and you don't follow doctors orders about how to stay safe, to stay alive. "What does she know? Doctors think they know everything. They always get things wrong." We temporarily avoid death and further destruction by putting down the drink and, we have a misguided sense that the people who are trying to help us "don't know me as well as I know me. Those people probably needed a lot of help, but I'm different. I got my nice, new German car waiting for me and a great job that comes along with it. Some of these people don't even work. What do they know?"

Interesting about the car...I'm not revealing a big secret when I say that many of us spend more time and energy when planning to make a major purchase than we do when it comes to getting sober. "I just won't drink and hope for the best." "I'll just remind myself how bad it is when I drink." "I'll just stay away from the bar. My wife doesn't like it when I drink at home." "I'll just..." The word 'just' too often meaning "only, and nothing more." Besides being dangerous, this kind of thinking, is only another branch on the denial tree.

Sitting in the car in the showroom is nice, but it won't get you sober. You don't want to come back here to report that you lost your job, and your car, and that you "should have listened." If that happens, I can pretty much guarantee that those losses will only represent the tip of a very dangerous iceberg.

fini

anything useful in any of the replies, myfdeserveit?
how are things today?