SoberComposer

Hi Everyone,

Thank you for being there for me. I haven't been on the site much of my recovery this time because I have been in a very intensive academic program but I remember everything that everyone has said to me the first time I tried quitting, years ago. I look forward to having more time to be on soon.

Back then, I had a problem understanding how addiction works and my relationship with it. Even tonight, with lots of stress, I have thought how nice it would be for a break to relax. But, I know that the break would lead to a hangover followed shortly by an immediate dependency. I'm done playing the game and thankful that I have support.

Thanks SR,
SC

Dee74

I'm glad you're going well SC.

One thing I would recommend tho - no matter how busy you get, don't neglect your recovery - it's the centre of the wheel really...without that we tend to come to a sudden, dead stop.

D

SoberComposer

Thank you Dee. This is actually why I am here tonight. I think I have began neglecting it because I started to have these claustrophobic feelings like I need a buzz. Anyway, I thought about what that would lead to and decided that would be a huge mistake and came here. Thanks Dee. You and the others are amazing people! It is great to read all of the newcomers seeking help as a reminder of how insidious and nefarious it truly is for us.

Anna

Good to hear from you!

flguy1

123 days is awesome!

least

Congrats on over four months sober! Keep going.

SoberComposer

Thanks everyone

I like to write poetry when I am conflicted so I wanted to share what I came up with:

alcohol had drowned the call within
a profound stall to ascend
i fought to recall but forgot how it all began
drowned and lost I sought a way for it to end
searched in Google and found some friends
who also lost ground on how to live
so now from within the future can begin
i'm over being the dummy as years descend
now with Sober Recovery on a brand new trend
soon to be loving me without being limited
much love to everyone who struggles with this

August252015

Glad you checked in.

I like the "profound stall to ascend"- well put.

Keep going!

teaorcoffee

Congratulations on 123 days and your decision to return - love your avatar by the way

PurpleKnight

Fantastic SoberComposer!! Keep it going!!

waywardson8260

Congratulations on 123 days!! We all have busy lives, but I agree with Dee that we cannot neglect recovery and we must spend some time and thoughts on our recovery efforts.

aasharon90

Staying connected as you build a strong,
solid recovery foundation to live your life
upon for many more one days sober ahead
of you will help you achieve many awesome
gifts in sobriety to be grateful and thankful
for and enjoy.

Terrific achievement..!!!

FreeOwl

123.... what a nice, auspicious number.

I'm glad you're doing well, SC. Very good to hear from you.

I'm proud of you. Keep it up!

bexxed

Glad you're here and congratulations! We are practically twins, I have 122 days today!!!

SoberComposer

Thank you everyone for welcoming me back! I am so glad I checked in last night. I had a moment of weakness from stress and really glad I came.

Thanks for being there for me. It feels good to not be alone with this.

Delilah1

Glad you decided to post, 123 days is great. You are smart to be vigilant, complacency was my downfall in the past.

SoberComposer

Thanks Delilah.

I wasn't that vigilant though. My first real sobriety date was mid August of 2014 and it lasted about 6-8 months before I decided it would be okay to have a beer with a burger on a hot summer day. Huge mistake. I was first so proud that I only had one beer and watched a movie. But that soon turned out to be years of on-again/off-again drinking. I was trying to be a "normal drinker" but then I met someone very special and she noticed pretty quickly that I had a problem. So that made me face the fact that even though I didn't drink as bad as I did in my 20s.. it was still a real problem.. and it was. I would try to moderate through the weekdays and was lucky to make it to Friday to do my heavy drinking. It is just no way to live. I am so glad I came back to sobriety and back to this site.

Thanks and congrats to your near 1 year of sobriety! That is awesome

MythOfSisyphus

Well done, SoberComposer!