Missed you guys
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 121
Missed you guys
Hey everyone,
I found a moment in my day to say hello. I hope everyone is doing okay. Since I've gone back to work I feel like I haven't a second to spare, though I log on and read threads when I can here and there.
Putting my daughter in daycare and returning to work has been terribly difficult. I am having a hard time balancing a personal and professional life. Due to a huge lack of training or competent trainers I feel like I was set up to fail. I have it coming from all angles and still am unaware of every single detail or task that needs completion.
I'm doing my best though.
My daughter is in a decent day care. I'm confident she's being cared for properly and I get good communications from her day care provider.
My AF has returned to drinking. It hasn't been bad but I feel like it's heading in a negative direction. Last night he said he'd have one or two because his work sent home a gift basket for his last day of the season and of course their was beer included. We need to discuss moving as we submitted our notice but he passed two and kept grabbing another. He wasn't being mean or obnoxious but I got annoyed because I really took time from my schedule to discuss things just for it to turn into a drinking night. He sensed something was wrong and asked and I answered "I thought you were only going to have 1 or 2?" He got offended.... we fought then went to bed (separately).
I got home from work tonight and he left shortly after I got home to go to the bar. Said he'd be an hour or so... 3 hours ago. He was home all day and I barely got a chance to sit down before he was out the door. Daughter had to be fed, changed, and tired out and put to bed. I'm exhausted.
He's communicating openly about where he's going and what he's doing for once... but I still find it discourteous to head out after just walking in after working all day so he can have some fun... all over being displeased about having more than the amount he stated.
I really should get some sleep. Morning comes early and work is going to be pressing tomorrow.
I found a moment in my day to say hello. I hope everyone is doing okay. Since I've gone back to work I feel like I haven't a second to spare, though I log on and read threads when I can here and there.
Putting my daughter in daycare and returning to work has been terribly difficult. I am having a hard time balancing a personal and professional life. Due to a huge lack of training or competent trainers I feel like I was set up to fail. I have it coming from all angles and still am unaware of every single detail or task that needs completion.
I'm doing my best though.
My daughter is in a decent day care. I'm confident she's being cared for properly and I get good communications from her day care provider.
My AF has returned to drinking. It hasn't been bad but I feel like it's heading in a negative direction. Last night he said he'd have one or two because his work sent home a gift basket for his last day of the season and of course their was beer included. We need to discuss moving as we submitted our notice but he passed two and kept grabbing another. He wasn't being mean or obnoxious but I got annoyed because I really took time from my schedule to discuss things just for it to turn into a drinking night. He sensed something was wrong and asked and I answered "I thought you were only going to have 1 or 2?" He got offended.... we fought then went to bed (separately).
I got home from work tonight and he left shortly after I got home to go to the bar. Said he'd be an hour or so... 3 hours ago. He was home all day and I barely got a chance to sit down before he was out the door. Daughter had to be fed, changed, and tired out and put to bed. I'm exhausted.
He's communicating openly about where he's going and what he's doing for once... but I still find it discourteous to head out after just walking in after working all day so he can have some fun... all over being displeased about having more than the amount he stated.
I really should get some sleep. Morning comes early and work is going to be pressing tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 773
Hi there!
Is AF = alcoholic fiancé?
Anyway - does not sound like he is much help - probably not something you expected anyway.
I hope you find peace and serenity - and work stabilizes. I find that breaking tasks into little pieces helps
Is AF = alcoholic fiancé?
Anyway - does not sound like he is much help - probably not something you expected anyway.
I hope you find peace and serenity - and work stabilizes. I find that breaking tasks into little pieces helps
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I'm very glad you're working. Don't let the new stuff overwhelm you. Ask for help when you need it. I think most people feel pretty lost the first few days/weeks/months of a new job. It's a big adjustment. You're up to it.
As for your fiance, are you sure you want to make a move WITH him? Commit to another living arrangement with someone you can't depend on?
As for your fiance, are you sure you want to make a move WITH him? Commit to another living arrangement with someone you can't depend on?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 982
Hi KBF,
I can definitely relate. My boys are 3 and 4 (5 next week). Going back to work, especially the first time, was excruciatingly heartbreaking. I wanted so badly to just be able to stay home... I still do, honestly.
I still feel as though I have a hard time balancing work and home, and all the guilt that comes along with it. It's rough... and it's neverendingly exhausting... Like I'm not able to do everything I want to with my kids because there's just not enough time, never able to keep the house as clean as I would like, and then feeling like a bad employee when I don't feel I'm really able to give 100% at work because I'm having to come in late, or take off when they're sick... or just feeling like I'm not really "all there" at work because I'm thinking about stuff in my personal life... especially when I was with my AH and he was drinking. I had such a hard time concentrating at work because so much was going on at home.
BUT, I also know being at home full time would drive me crazy. It is nice to come to work and have a quiet moment or two throughout the day in my office and sip coffee, have adult conversations with my co-workers who I love, and even sometimes have a FREE hour lunch break to go to the gym or run errands without kids.... Part time work would be ideal... but it is what it is, and I keep trying to see all the positives of it, and cut myself some slack. I know I'm doing the best I can do, even if we never get around to making those Pinterest fingerprint snowman salt dough ornaments for the grandparents this year....
Some things just have to get put on the back burner, and that's okay
I'm sorry your AF is drinking again... Keep taking care of YOU and your little one! You're doing great Mom! Glad you're back here.
I can definitely relate. My boys are 3 and 4 (5 next week). Going back to work, especially the first time, was excruciatingly heartbreaking. I wanted so badly to just be able to stay home... I still do, honestly.
I still feel as though I have a hard time balancing work and home, and all the guilt that comes along with it. It's rough... and it's neverendingly exhausting... Like I'm not able to do everything I want to with my kids because there's just not enough time, never able to keep the house as clean as I would like, and then feeling like a bad employee when I don't feel I'm really able to give 100% at work because I'm having to come in late, or take off when they're sick... or just feeling like I'm not really "all there" at work because I'm thinking about stuff in my personal life... especially when I was with my AH and he was drinking. I had such a hard time concentrating at work because so much was going on at home.
BUT, I also know being at home full time would drive me crazy. It is nice to come to work and have a quiet moment or two throughout the day in my office and sip coffee, have adult conversations with my co-workers who I love, and even sometimes have a FREE hour lunch break to go to the gym or run errands without kids.... Part time work would be ideal... but it is what it is, and I keep trying to see all the positives of it, and cut myself some slack. I know I'm doing the best I can do, even if we never get around to making those Pinterest fingerprint snowman salt dough ornaments for the grandparents this year....
Some things just have to get put on the back burner, and that's okay
I'm sorry your AF is drinking again... Keep taking care of YOU and your little one! You're doing great Mom! Glad you're back here.
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