hearthealth

I've been sad and removed lately. I realize he is not going to change and this is our marriage. I've told him what I need and it must not be important to him. He even criticized some important feelings I have. This loveless marriage really hurts especially when I do and give and get nothing in return. I have been in touch with a lawyer and this limbo is a bad feeling. When one does not know the future or but can't accept the present. There is no action in his part and very little communication. He just shows up like a person on a park bench. He has all the right to be there but it's affecting me to be in the space. It is affecting my happiness.

FireSprite

It sounds like you are stuck in a very uncomfortable place - too aware to deny what you see but not quite ready for big changes. And that's ok - we all get there when we're ready & we all rely on baby steps.

This reminds me of that saying that goes something like, "when one door closes another opens, but it can be hell in the hallway."

LexieCat

I'd suggest you talk some more to the DV folks about a strategy for you to leave safely. He is an abusive man--we know this. Despite the fact that your marriage is "loveless," he isn't likely to react well to your leaving. He could easily become violent and vindictive, destroying your belongings, scaring your kids, etc.

You need a COMPLETE plan--the legal advice is important, but so safety/practical considerations when you are leaving an abuser.

hearthealth

So when i called the national hotline she was helpful. Then they transferred me to the local agency. The local agency transferred me to another person. The other person was at a meeting and it's over a week since I left a message without a return call. I think it's a sign from a HP tthat that's not the route.

CodeJob

Or it's a sign to call back and advocate for your future heart health.

hearthealth

National hotline was talking about me filing a cps and I could be charged and I'm like whoa. Too fast I don't have an exit or support to take this action now.