New here
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 11
New here
Hi all,
I'm new here, trying to make today day one! Drinking is ruining my relationships with my kids an husband. I think i may actually be alergic as I am pretty wasted by 3 glasses of wine, & then I can't/ don't stop. Not to mention I don't remember most nights and usually pass out, but somehow I have managed to still hold down my job. Although I am very depressed, negative and paranoid! Today I feel like absolute s**t!
I'm new here, trying to make today day one! Drinking is ruining my relationships with my kids an husband. I think i may actually be alergic as I am pretty wasted by 3 glasses of wine, & then I can't/ don't stop. Not to mention I don't remember most nights and usually pass out, but somehow I have managed to still hold down my job. Although I am very depressed, negative and paranoid! Today I feel like absolute s**t!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Western US
Posts: 1,765
Welcome Gingerspice. This is a great place. I'm near two months in now, but without this site I don't know if I would have made it this far. This site was my crutch to get me past the first couple of weeks. If I wasn't working or sleeping I was here reading, reading, reading.
Once past the first couple of weeks (even 1 week) I felt so much better and clear headed that I was able to start putting a plan together that was "real". When still drinking my plan was just "hopes" at best.
Stick around. Let us be your crutch to get you clear headed and feeling better.
Once past the first couple of weeks (even 1 week) I felt so much better and clear headed that I was able to start putting a plan together that was "real". When still drinking my plan was just "hopes" at best.
Stick around. Let us be your crutch to get you clear headed and feeling better.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 11
I'm trying to look at today as a new day , but I Am in buckets of tears right now.
My husband drinks every night. I have stopped before for a month or so then say I'm going to try moderation but sadly that never works for me!
It doesn't affect my husband the same way,. I need to find other things to do, but I'm sure tonight will be rough.
My husband drinks every night. I have stopped before for a month or so then say I'm going to try moderation but sadly that never works for me!
It doesn't affect my husband the same way,. I need to find other things to do, but I'm sure tonight will be rough.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
hey Gingerspice, welcome.
you keep mentioning 'try'...what does that look like?
for me, actually 'doing' worked out better than trying-to-do, and participating on a forum is one part of doing.
hope you'll look around and add other do-things, i.e. actions, and your chances of getting sober and staying that way will much increase.
stick around.
you keep mentioning 'try'...what does that look like?
for me, actually 'doing' worked out better than trying-to-do, and participating on a forum is one part of doing.
hope you'll look around and add other do-things, i.e. actions, and your chances of getting sober and staying that way will much increase.
stick around.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 11
I have a 21 year old son who decided to stay in California when we moved to Michigan. I have a 15 year old daughter & a 13 year old daughter. My 15 year old has been through enough trauma in her 15 years than most people go through in a lifetime. Most of this trauma was triggered by an assault that happened when we moved! I drank before, but I drink a lot more now! Sometimes I'm not sure how I'm still alive.
My son was around for some of the bad times, but I didn't start heavily drinking until my 40s. I've had some really bad public drunkenness that I don't remember, but those who were there do.
My husbands family drinks a lot, and when we all get together it can be fun, I think I worry what that will look like sober. They have all seen me st my worst for sure
My son was around for some of the bad times, but I didn't start heavily drinking until my 40s. I've had some really bad public drunkenness that I don't remember, but those who were there do.
My husbands family drinks a lot, and when we all get together it can be fun, I think I worry what that will look like sober. They have all seen me st my worst for sure
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Hi Gingerspice. It has definitely helped me to be here - where I can talk things over with people who understand.
It sounds like drinking is just bringing you misery. Once, I thought it was fun & relaxing. It seemed to help me cope with stress. As I grew more dependent on it I realized it only made everything worse. Every time it was in my system bad things happened. It was so good to get free. You can do it.
It sounds like drinking is just bringing you misery. Once, I thought it was fun & relaxing. It seemed to help me cope with stress. As I grew more dependent on it I realized it only made everything worse. Every time it was in my system bad things happened. It was so good to get free. You can do it.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 874
Hi, GingerSpice. Most of us have embarrassing public drunkenness stories.
Any chance your husband will be there to support your sobriety? I drank alone most of the time so there weren't any drinking buddies that would interfere with my sobering up.
Any chance your husband will be there to support your sobriety? I drank alone most of the time so there weren't any drinking buddies that would interfere with my sobering up.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 11
FLcamper,
Well he will probably slow it a bit, but I don't think he will quit. It doesn't affect him the way it does me . So, yeah that is what will make it harder for me.
Even right now I'm wondering what the hell my night is going to look like. I will likely just go to bed because otherwise we will watch a movie or something & he will have glass after glass of wine., and I will get angry on the inside. Or I'll think I will just have one, which never works . I've tried it too many times.
When he goes out of town, I don't drink. I think him drinking is definitely a trigger for me.
Well he will probably slow it a bit, but I don't think he will quit. It doesn't affect him the way it does me . So, yeah that is what will make it harder for me.
Even right now I'm wondering what the hell my night is going to look like. I will likely just go to bed because otherwise we will watch a movie or something & he will have glass after glass of wine., and I will get angry on the inside. Or I'll think I will just have one, which never works . I've tried it too many times.
When he goes out of town, I don't drink. I think him drinking is definitely a trigger for me.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 131
Hey gingerspice, I can totally relate. I too am sick of the cycle of crap but had a fairly good experience tonight that I have just posted. I am starting to get very hooked on SR and feel all the positive stories and comments are starting to penetrate my drink addled brain....hopefully. Keep reading, this site is awesome and packed with love and non judgemental advise.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 709
Hi gingerspice, you will find a lot of support here. Sounds like you're having a hard time being sober while your husband is drinking. Does he support you in this? If he is truly a "normal" drinker, he should be able to take it or leave it. Can you ask him not to drink around you? Maybe when you're more secure in your sobriety it won't be such an issue, but for now you just have to protect yourself. I've been sober almost a year and I still don't put myself in situations where I know there will be a lot of drinking.
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