Jennes

I vowed to get to 30 days and then see what happens, since I knew that if I didn't have a goal set in mind, the thought of quitting forever would have been too hard to do when I first made the decision to quit. I'm a bit worried that once I hit 30 days I'll start drinking again. I know this because I had the urge to go and buy a bottle of wine but I had to tell myself I'd be too disappointed in myself if I gave in when I only had 4 days left.

Throughout these last 26 days I've read books about mindfulness and how to control cravings. And I have a plan to start attending AA this weekend. My friends have been supportive and haven't pressured me to go out, even when my favorite band was playing the other day. So I've been successful thus far.

Does anyone have anything that helped them keep it going past a 30 day goal? Also I know I can't stay holed up forever, so I'm hoping for any advice that might help with how to handle going out and being around alcohol, since I pretty much haven't left the house unless it's to go to work or to run errands since I stopped drinking.

Thank you all for your incredible support!

Venecia

First, congrats on 26 days.

A few thoughts ...

- Don't look at alcohol as your reward. None of us is on SR because alcohol ever did us one favor. Not one. Look at a better life as your reward.

- Give yourself credit. You've gotten through the hardest part. You can get through Day 31 more easily than you did Day 3. And the days to follow will be easier. It gets better.

- Safeguard your sobriety like the precious gift it is. You don't *have* to go to places where alcohol is served. There are other places and other ways to enjoy being out in the world.

- You're fortunate to have supportive friends. Ask them to go to a movie or for a walk or any of the many other things you can do without being exposed to alcohol.

You're doing really well! Keep up the good work and remember that you can do this! And that it gets better.

cwood3

Well, the obvious is to keep doing what you did for the last 26 days. I know they have a lot of AA meetings around Austin 7 days a week...no need to have to wait for a certain day....today is good.

Oh yea, do you want to quit drinking for good, or are you just testing the water. There is a huge difference.

I wish you well!

JD

I just passed a year and I tell myself, why would I want to screw that up by drinking. 30 days is a big accomplishment so why would you want to screw that up? Milestones can be dangerous because it's easy to tell yourself I should be rewarded. I've also found that with sobriety it's easy to tell yourself, maybe I don't have as big a problem as I thought and I can drink moderately. They're all AV lies. Don't fall for those traps and you'll do fine.

30 days really is a big deal and you should be proud of yourself for getting there. Just don't get cocky.

Ooona

Maybe make a list of all the reasons you wanted to stop ( even if for just thirty days) that might serve as a good reminder.

I quit last year for a detox ( weight loss) challenge and when I went back to drinking I planned to just drink minimally ( at that time I was really concerned mostly with weight gain). It was only about one month that I was back to over using and all that goes with that. I wanted to kick my own azz because I just had to go through all the crap all over again. Now Im ALL IN for my recovery and Im NOT giving up my sober life for nothing!

Best to you! Great job for working these last twenty some
thing days! 30 days is fantastic!!

shirlygirly

On several occasions I set a 30-day goal and I drank every single time. I even downloaded the 12-step app to keep track of the days, and then I'd reset it each time I hit the 30-day mark. Mentally, I felt like drinking was a reward for my 30 days sober. I also felt like I didn't have a problem if I could go for thirty days without a drink.

When I finally got sober, I did it one day at a time. My goals were small...get to the next hour...through the morning to the afternoon...then the evening without a drink. It worked for 30 days, 60, 90, six months, nine months, a year, etc. Eventually it just became part of who I was. At this point drinking very, very rarely crosses my mind.

So my advice is to set small, daily goals. In the morning think, "I'm not gonna drink today." Then at the end of the day pat yourself on the back for not drinking. Gratitude lists are good, too. Make a list at the end of each day for the things you're grateful for. That list will grow and grow the longer you stay sober! They definitely helped me get through the early days of sobriety.

Dee74

30 days will not reset you, Jennes. It won't make you into a normal drinker and it won't take away the bad stuff that happens when you drink.

You already know whats back the way you've come...why not commit to finding out whats ahead of you this way, into recovery?

D

Delilah1

You have already made it through the first few days/weeks which are the most difficult. I am closing in on nine months sober, and any time I have thought about drinking I have played the tape through and thought about how awful I would feel the next morning when I woke up.

In the past I have made it a month, or a few months and then decided I could moderate my drinking, that never happened, and I found myself back to daily drinking again.

You mentioned mindfulness, that has been a big part of my recovery this time. Think about how much more present you are able to be when you are sober.

Looking g forward to seeing your 30 day post, and even more so your 31 day...

❤️ Delilah

least

Stay sober, please. The rewards are worth the effort.

Congrats on 26 days sober! Keep going, it gets better.

Fly N Buy

I got to 30 days by not drinking on day 29 - same way I got to 840 days today by not drinking on day 839. You can too - nothing special just desire and prioritizing.

MIRecovery

In the beginning for me is all I knew for sure was I had to stay sober indefinitely. I accepted the fact I would never be able to drink normally. I knew the first drink was the problem not the last.

Over time not drinking indefinitely changed to not drinking forever. I know me and if I had a goal of 30 days on day 31 I would be drunk

Soberwolf

I liked what D said ...

Remember what made you make a day 1 in the first place ? you don't want to go back to feeling like that or worse & it's guaranteed if you or myself drink again

I'm a sober alcoholic I accept I can't drink safely socially or responsibly I won't be fooled by my lies when I hear them... classics such as 'im better now' 'its only one' 'i deserve this' 'im not a alcoholic' 'i can drink without getting drunk' all this is BS

Don't be fooled by your AV you are doing amazing and right now just focus on day 26 tomorrow is a new day x

WhiskeyBent

Im struggling with the same thoughts. Im going with the one day at a time approach. I was stoked about hitting 30 days. Now im day 31. and 32 tomorrow. Its the best we can do.

Purpleskye

I used to set goals based on health expectations (six weeks for cleared liver, two months for healthy brain neurotransmitters) before I realized that was silly - any day on alcohol was a health issue in itself.
It's different for everyone, but retraining the habit and the thought process is ultimately what wins.
Best advice I ever read was to chase every craving by watching a funny movie. Not even kidding. And it works!
Congrats on your accomplishments already, and those soon to come!

january161992

hi jennes

U75

If my math is right (no guarantee), today is day thirty. There's a lot of great advice already in this thread. I can only add that it will feel so GOOD for you to wake up sober, rested and ready to take on the world on day 31. Good luck Jennes.

Dee74

How's it going Jennes?

D

Noma11

Good luck brother, it is worth it, I managed 65 days before relapsing and my health was so much better because of it, if I can do 65 lets bring on 100
you are not alone