Day 1
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Day 1
I'm 31 and I've been drinking pretty heavily off and on for the last year or so, and for the last week I've been on a binge. Basically permanently drunk. I feel horrible physically and mentally and have known for a long time that this has to stop.
I start a new job on Monday so I have to take these last few days before I start the job to stop the madness that comes with drinking.
I'm a nervous wreck though as I, like almost everyone here I'm sure, drank so I wouldn't have to feel anything. A lot of emotional things have happened in my life over the last year, specifically the last few months. I feel very raw and drinking has been how I cope.
Anyway, I may try to go to an AA meeting tomorrow. I know today will mostly be attempting to sleep/rest. I know though that I can't do this alone and that I need a support group and recovery plan.
Thanks in advance for any and all support. It's beyond appreciated.
I start a new job on Monday so I have to take these last few days before I start the job to stop the madness that comes with drinking.
I'm a nervous wreck though as I, like almost everyone here I'm sure, drank so I wouldn't have to feel anything. A lot of emotional things have happened in my life over the last year, specifically the last few months. I feel very raw and drinking has been how I cope.
Anyway, I may try to go to an AA meeting tomorrow. I know today will mostly be attempting to sleep/rest. I know though that I can't do this alone and that I need a support group and recovery plan.
Thanks in advance for any and all support. It's beyond appreciated.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 636
Welcome to the forum and congrats on day one. I relapse after 230 days clean and went on a near 2 month binge. I am ashamed of a lot of things that happened in those 2 months so now I know it's time to change and face my problems instead of numbing them. Post here as much as possible it helped me
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by GhostFace 
Welcome to the forum and congrats on day one. I relapse after 230 days clean and went on a near 2 month binge. I am ashamed of a lot of things that happened in those 2 months so now I know it's time to change and face my problems instead of numbing them. Post here as much as possible it helped me
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
Good luck on Monday. Drink a lot of water while you are recovering. I think AA would be a good idea. People that understand you.
Great job on deciding to get sober, not an easy thing at any age, but your age, I think would be really difficult. Seems drinking is the thing to do. Peace to you.
Great job on deciding to get sober, not an easy thing at any age, but your age, I think would be really difficult. Seems drinking is the thing to do. Peace to you.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
Hi Swimmer,
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 379
The line you said hit a nerve, about how we drink to cope with emotions/feelings.
I could relate to that so much as my drinking took an all out downward spiral after my son passed away. I was in an emotionally despairing and completely shattered and I turned to alcohol to help me sleep and forget my pain. I checked out every single day as I ran and ran and ran from this deep soul sadness. I finally decided that I must stop this madness. The alcohol actually was hindering my healing process and my ability to function and deal with the loss. Suffering and pain is part of the human experience as is love, joy, happiness. Alcohol not only robs us of healing from bad emotional experiences but it also numbs out the good feelings to! Because I chose to use a subtance to cope, I actually prolonged the healing I so desperately need and so now I must face my raw feelings as if my loss happened just recently, not almost two years ago.
I wish you the best of everything. I share my story in hopes of you knowing that you are not alone in this and that it can be done my friend.
Stay with us and let us help you!
I could relate to that so much as my drinking took an all out downward spiral after my son passed away. I was in an emotionally despairing and completely shattered and I turned to alcohol to help me sleep and forget my pain. I checked out every single day as I ran and ran and ran from this deep soul sadness. I finally decided that I must stop this madness. The alcohol actually was hindering my healing process and my ability to function and deal with the loss. Suffering and pain is part of the human experience as is love, joy, happiness. Alcohol not only robs us of healing from bad emotional experiences but it also numbs out the good feelings to! Because I chose to use a subtance to cope, I actually prolonged the healing I so desperately need and so now I must face my raw feelings as if my loss happened just recently, not almost two years ago.
I wish you the best of everything. I share my story in hopes of you knowing that you are not alone in this and that it can be done my friend.
Stay with us and let us help you!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by Bobbieka
Good luck on Monday. Drink a lot of water while you are recovering. I think AA would be a good idea. People that understand you.
Great job on deciding to get sober, not an easy thing at any age, but your age, I think would be really difficult. Seems drinking is the thing to do. Peace to you.
Great job on deciding to get sober, not an easy thing at any age, but your age, I think would be really difficult. Seems drinking is the thing to do. Peace to you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by wildflower70
Hi Swimmer,
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by Ooona
The line you said hit a nerve, about how we drink to cope with emotions/feelings.
I could relate to that so much as my drinking took an all out downward spiral after my son passed away. I was in an emotionally despairing and completely shattered and I turned to alcohol to help me sleep and forget my pain. I checked out every single day as I ran and ran and ran from this deep soul sadness. I finally decided that I must stop this madness. The alcohol actually was hindering my healing process and my ability to function and deal with the loss. Suffering and pain is part of the human experience as is love, joy, happiness. Alcohol not only robs us of healing from bad emotional experiences but it also numbs out the good feelings to! Because I chose to use a subtance to cope, I actually prolonged the healing I so desperately need and so now I must face my raw feelings as if my loss happened just recently, not almost two years ago.
I wish you the best of everything. I share my story in hopes of you knowing that you are not alone in this and that it can be done my friend.
Stay with us and let us help you!
I could relate to that so much as my drinking took an all out downward spiral after my son passed away. I was in an emotionally despairing and completely shattered and I turned to alcohol to help me sleep and forget my pain. I checked out every single day as I ran and ran and ran from this deep soul sadness. I finally decided that I must stop this madness. The alcohol actually was hindering my healing process and my ability to function and deal with the loss. Suffering and pain is part of the human experience as is love, joy, happiness. Alcohol not only robs us of healing from bad emotional experiences but it also numbs out the good feelings to! Because I chose to use a subtance to cope, I actually prolonged the healing I so desperately need and so now I must face my raw feelings as if my loss happened just recently, not almost two years ago.
I wish you the best of everything. I share my story in hopes of you knowing that you are not alone in this and that it can be done my friend.
Stay with us and let us help you!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Lakeside, Arizona
Posts: 1,138
Originally Posted by wildflower70
Hi Swimmer,
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
I wish I had quit drinking at 31, after my 2nd DUI. But NO, I went on for another 15 years...in my own personal prison.
Please don't make that mistake....love yourself now more than ever and forgive yourself for having this addiction.
Rest, water, movies, long showers, walks, and more rest!
This too shall pass. Bless you on this journey.
I wish I would have quit then as well! My liver would be a lot healthier. It's taken the fear of dying on my loved ones to get me to stop.
It still took a year and a half to start after my blood tests showed trouble.
Good luck and welcome! It sucks at first but it gets a little easier all the time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by tekink
I wish I would have quit then as well! My liver would be a lot healthier. It's taken the fear of dying on my loved ones to get me to stop.
It still took a year and a half to start after my blood tests showed trouble.
Good luck and welcome! It sucks at first but it gets a little easier all the time.
It still took a year and a half to start after my blood tests showed trouble.
Good luck and welcome! It sucks at first but it gets a little easier all the time.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,428
Welcome Swimmer! I'm at 8 weeks today and sooo glad I quit. Ice cream can stop a craving
The best thing I did here in the beginning was spend a lot of time reading posts and all the stickies. Withdrawal can be dangerous, if you have any concerning symptoms, please see a physician. Reach out here for help if you need it. Best to you!
The best thing I did here in the beginning was spend a lot of time reading posts and all the stickies. Withdrawal can be dangerous, if you have any concerning symptoms, please see a physician. Reach out here for help if you need it. Best to you!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by CountryChick
Welcome GreenSwimmer! I am also starting Day 1 and I know how you feel. I've been on a binge for several weeks now and I also feel extremely anxious. Best of luck to you and good luck on your new job!
Hang it there, you can do it and so can I! I just came back from a long walk and the whole time was listening to an AA meeting on YouTube... Maybe it was the combo of being in the cool, crisp morning air and the inspiring story I was listening to, but I feel really great right now. Maybe try doing the same if you can and if you're up for it. Best of luck to you also and stay strong! I know this will be worth it for us both!
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