Finished outpatient treatment today...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Nashville
Posts: 326
Finished outpatient treatment today...
Hi guys! Quick question for you all...
So I FINALLY completed my substance abuse intensive outpatient program today. (Yay for no longer having to wake up when the sun is rising...) I complained about it a lot because I don't think it really benefited me much, which I still believe. There were some bits and pieces that I took away from though. And it definitely helped get me into a routine of going to bed at a decent time knowing I had to be somewhere early the next morning... kinda gives one a little less incentive to drink.
Anyways, now that I'm finally done with it, I am completely freaking myself out. I am absolutely terrified I'm going to drink again. I'm not even really thinking about it or wanting it or having cravings, but I'm so so fearful. It's almost like when you're practicing riding a bicycle and you have someone holding on from behind, and then they let go of the bike, and you're on your own!
The psychiatrist asked me during group today what my plan was to do instead of drinking. I have come up with a ton of tools for my toolbox... staying on SR, reading lots of novels and recovery related books, reading sobriety based blogs, listening to sobriety based podcasts, eating ice cream & drinking LaCroix water, playing Xbox, doing yoga, taking hot baths.. I mean heck, I'm planning a trip to Italy for next year. I'd never be able to do that drunk/hungover.
My point in saying all of that is that I did not share all of those details with the psychiatrist because I don't talk a lot in front of groups of people. And at the end of the group he's like "Well you need to figure out a plan because you just not wanting to drink is not going to keep you sober." It kind of was a hard blow because I do have a plan... I've changed my entire lifestyle and way of doing things since becoming sober... I wouldn't be sober now if I hadn't had a plan. It just kind of (or very much!) discouraged me when he said that.
Just figured I'd ask for your opinions...
So I FINALLY completed my substance abuse intensive outpatient program today. (Yay for no longer having to wake up when the sun is rising...) I complained about it a lot because I don't think it really benefited me much, which I still believe. There were some bits and pieces that I took away from though. And it definitely helped get me into a routine of going to bed at a decent time knowing I had to be somewhere early the next morning... kinda gives one a little less incentive to drink.
Anyways, now that I'm finally done with it, I am completely freaking myself out. I am absolutely terrified I'm going to drink again. I'm not even really thinking about it or wanting it or having cravings, but I'm so so fearful. It's almost like when you're practicing riding a bicycle and you have someone holding on from behind, and then they let go of the bike, and you're on your own!
The psychiatrist asked me during group today what my plan was to do instead of drinking. I have come up with a ton of tools for my toolbox... staying on SR, reading lots of novels and recovery related books, reading sobriety based blogs, listening to sobriety based podcasts, eating ice cream & drinking LaCroix water, playing Xbox, doing yoga, taking hot baths.. I mean heck, I'm planning a trip to Italy for next year. I'd never be able to do that drunk/hungover.
My point in saying all of that is that I did not share all of those details with the psychiatrist because I don't talk a lot in front of groups of people. And at the end of the group he's like "Well you need to figure out a plan because you just not wanting to drink is not going to keep you sober." It kind of was a hard blow because I do have a plan... I've changed my entire lifestyle and way of doing things since becoming sober... I wouldn't be sober now if I hadn't had a plan. It just kind of (or very much!) discouraged me when he said that.
Just figured I'd ask for your opinions...
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
He said you are going to have to figure out a plan...
You said you DO have a plan. You said it here. Did you say it there?
Did your iop suggest or help you to formulate a plan? Bad on them if they didn't.
But why would you be 'upset' if you needed something, already got it, then someone suggested you get it.
It's like you are wearing dirty worn out ratty old sneakers when you have a new pair still in the box, then a friend suggests you get new sneakers. Do you get insulted? You know you need new sneakers, you already have them, but you are still wearing the old ones. Don't worry about it, put on the new sneakers and keep going.
Use your plan. Don't leave it in the box.
You said you DO have a plan. You said it here. Did you say it there?
Did your iop suggest or help you to formulate a plan? Bad on them if they didn't.
But why would you be 'upset' if you needed something, already got it, then someone suggested you get it.
It's like you are wearing dirty worn out ratty old sneakers when you have a new pair still in the box, then a friend suggests you get new sneakers. Do you get insulted? You know you need new sneakers, you already have them, but you are still wearing the old ones. Don't worry about it, put on the new sneakers and keep going.
Use your plan. Don't leave it in the box.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,618
If I were you I'd come up with two things and practice them!
A Recovery Plan and a Crisis Plan.
Sounds like you have come up with a Recovery Plan. But those are usually too involved and overwhelming to be of use in an emotional crisis.
A crisis plan is a few things that you can do anytime/anywhere that you are having a meltdown. It shouldn't be overwhelming and it should be simple enough that you can remember it in a panic.
Hope this helps somewhat ... I can relate to how you feel.
A Recovery Plan and a Crisis Plan.
Sounds like you have come up with a Recovery Plan. But those are usually too involved and overwhelming to be of use in an emotional crisis.
A crisis plan is a few things that you can do anytime/anywhere that you are having a meltdown. It shouldn't be overwhelming and it should be simple enough that you can remember it in a panic.
Hope this helps somewhat ... I can relate to how you feel.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 322
Don't worry about it, put on the new sneakers and keep going.
Use your plan. Don't leave it in the box.
Use your plan. Don't leave it in the box.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 379
Im surprised that 1) The IOP didnt have you complete an aftercare/recovery plan prior to completing treatment. Most Ive known of wont allow you to complete until you have written out a plan and either turned it in or presented to the group and gotten feedback on it. 2) that the IOP didnt insist that you have a plan that includes some form of f2f ongoing support. Your plan is a good one but all of the things you mention are things done normally alone. Alone isnt good for us. Its ok in small measures but we do need to start making sober friends. acquaintances and getting help with and from others who understand us.
That would be my only suggestion, add at least one thing to your plan that requires you to get out of your own space/your own head.
Congratulations on completing IOP successfully! Thats awesome especially since you contemplated quitting ( doing things your way
) and powered through!! Awesome!
That would be my only suggestion, add at least one thing to your plan that requires you to get out of your own space/your own head.
Congratulations on completing IOP successfully! Thats awesome especially since you contemplated quitting ( doing things your way
) and powered through!! Awesome!
Guest
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
I think you are doing well. I'm still having lots of anxiety and if your recovery plan is working then keep going with it. I can understand your terror about drinking again; I face the same fear everyday. AA is not always the answer so if you are fine without it then just keep going.
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by CajunPrincess 
...I don't think it really benefited me much, which I still believe. There were some bits and pieces that I took away from though.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
I think it sounds like you have a good plan in place. Keep the plan firmly in mind and it will ease your worries about staying sober. And, take action when you feel you need to take action.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
What strikes me the most is you finished it...meaning you accomplished something significant from beginning to end. That's awesome. Its an accomplishment, a feather in your hat if you will. A huge step in my opinion. Good job.
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