Well, here we go....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Illinois
Posts: 4
Well, here we go....
First post here, although I've been coming to the site for a few years...
So the crap hit the fan (once again) and I'm on my way to IOP in 3 weeks. I'm actually very excited and of course a little nervous. I've been trying to lick this thing on my own (my own way, of course) for the past 10 years.
All the things they say about it being a progressive disease are spot on. My story is much like many of those I've come across on here. Started drinking at 17 (I'm 47 now), drank all through college for fun, then entered the working world and kicked it up several notches. I'm in sales and it's not only an accepted thing in my particular field, it's often expected... So of course, I jumped right in.
The first chinks in the armor came in '08 and it's been a steady down hill slide ever since. DUI came in '13, followed by several attempts to quit- usually lasting 10-50 days, then followed by epic 3-4 day benders that completely wiped out any "progress" I made.
Trips to AA through the years have produced nothing but lip service from me. I've gone through the motions with the steps, but my heart has never been in it.
The past 5 years have been rough... 2 of my best friends passed away, I logged the DUI, and my benders have progressed to full blown madness- disaapearing, not showing up for work, drinking in the morning, terrible financial decisions, fights with the wife, blackouts, falling down stairs, making an ass out of myself on social media, getting kicked out of bars, etc (you know the drill)
So now, I stand at a serious crossroads. I'm entering a 6 week IOP program here in Chicago in 3 weeks. I'm 6 days sober and trying to get my act together and clean up the mess. I'm fortunate because my wife, kids, parents and most friends are being very supportive and loving. I'm extremely lucky in this regard.
Somehow, I have to find a way to reverse a 30 year habbit before it kills me. I'm addicted to alcohol and it's ruining me. The good news is I'm not dead and have a boatload of things to live for.
I hope and pray that I can find some peace and let this program help me. I have a feeling this is my last shot.
Thanks for listening to my rambling. I enjoy reading posts from all of you that share this dreadful disease.
Peace & Good vibes to you all-
Kevin
So the crap hit the fan (once again) and I'm on my way to IOP in 3 weeks. I'm actually very excited and of course a little nervous. I've been trying to lick this thing on my own (my own way, of course) for the past 10 years.
All the things they say about it being a progressive disease are spot on. My story is much like many of those I've come across on here. Started drinking at 17 (I'm 47 now), drank all through college for fun, then entered the working world and kicked it up several notches. I'm in sales and it's not only an accepted thing in my particular field, it's often expected... So of course, I jumped right in.
The first chinks in the armor came in '08 and it's been a steady down hill slide ever since. DUI came in '13, followed by several attempts to quit- usually lasting 10-50 days, then followed by epic 3-4 day benders that completely wiped out any "progress" I made.
Trips to AA through the years have produced nothing but lip service from me. I've gone through the motions with the steps, but my heart has never been in it.
The past 5 years have been rough... 2 of my best friends passed away, I logged the DUI, and my benders have progressed to full blown madness- disaapearing, not showing up for work, drinking in the morning, terrible financial decisions, fights with the wife, blackouts, falling down stairs, making an ass out of myself on social media, getting kicked out of bars, etc (you know the drill)
So now, I stand at a serious crossroads. I'm entering a 6 week IOP program here in Chicago in 3 weeks. I'm 6 days sober and trying to get my act together and clean up the mess. I'm fortunate because my wife, kids, parents and most friends are being very supportive and loving. I'm extremely lucky in this regard.
Somehow, I have to find a way to reverse a 30 year habbit before it kills me. I'm addicted to alcohol and it's ruining me. The good news is I'm not dead and have a boatload of things to live for.
I hope and pray that I can find some peace and let this program help me. I have a feeling this is my last shot.
Thanks for listening to my rambling. I enjoy reading posts from all of you that share this dreadful disease.
Peace & Good vibes to you all-
Kevin
Friendly Folk
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Powers Lake, Wisconsin
Posts: 21,698
Kevin,
Hi and Welcome! You sound strong, motivated and smart about what is at stake here. Keep posting on your progress with IOP. It will be well worth it and I wish you only the best. ♡CR
Hi and Welcome! You sound strong, motivated and smart about what is at stake here. Keep posting on your progress with IOP. It will be well worth it and I wish you only the best. ♡CR
AA Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Silicon Valley
Posts: 2,977
i had to get thrown into a locked psych ward at a year sober before i could get honest/ willing and get into recovery
sobriety vs recovery ... 2 different things
keep posting and tell us how youre doing
im interested!
God bless
sobriety vs recovery ... 2 different things
keep posting and tell us how youre doing
im interested!
God bless
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,036
Welcome Kevin! You can definitely do this. I have just over 8 months and this site has been an incredible resource. Looking forward to hearing about your journey with IOP. Do you have a plan to help you remain sober through the weekend?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 322
Kevin, congratulations. Your new life started 6 days ago! Two things, from my current experience.....
If you have support from friends and family, you have a very important tool in your sobriety toolbox, don't leave your tools out in the rain, they don't work good when rusty. That support and understanding will keep you from being lonely on your road to recovery.
Be honest with yourself, brutally honest. Recover for you..........for you. Sure, your family and friends will also benefit, but make sure you're doing it for you because if you don't do it for you, it will have no meaning for them.
I wish you a great success. Keep on bro.
If you have support from friends and family, you have a very important tool in your sobriety toolbox, don't leave your tools out in the rain, they don't work good when rusty. That support and understanding will keep you from being lonely on your road to recovery.
Be honest with yourself, brutally honest. Recover for you..........for you. Sure, your family and friends will also benefit, but make sure you're doing it for you because if you don't do it for you, it will have no meaning for them.
I wish you a great success. Keep on bro.
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