How do you start?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1
How do you start?
Hi,
I've been an addict since I was 18 close to a decade ago. I have almost lost my life twice to drugs, ruined many other peoples. The weight doesn't seem to sink in of the severity. I can't say no and if I continue I won't go anywhere. I tried AA for 30 days and then just went right back. How do you adapt to being sober? How do you deal with the embarassment? I don't know how to begin thinking about life being sober. Any beginning encouragement will be greatly appreacited.
I've been an addict since I was 18 close to a decade ago. I have almost lost my life twice to drugs, ruined many other peoples. The weight doesn't seem to sink in of the severity. I can't say no and if I continue I won't go anywhere. I tried AA for 30 days and then just went right back. How do you adapt to being sober? How do you deal with the embarassment? I don't know how to begin thinking about life being sober. Any beginning encouragement will be greatly appreacited.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
Welcome, Milton!
This place is a good start!
I went to in-patient treatment for 5 weeks, attended AA, and just did what I was told at first. At that point, I knew I didn't have any answers beyond that.
I was willing follow suggestions because all the resistance and stubbornness had been beaten out of me by alcohol and I was desperate to stop suffering and I didn't stop my recovery program after 30 days.
I don't find it at all embarrassing to be sober, but I sure was embarrassed a lot when I was still out there. Adapting to sobriety is a day-by-day learning--it's a whole new life. When I first got sober, I thought my life was over and it would be dull and boring, but I found out how screwed up that thinking was.
This place is a good start!
I went to in-patient treatment for 5 weeks, attended AA, and just did what I was told at first. At that point, I knew I didn't have any answers beyond that.
I was willing follow suggestions because all the resistance and stubbornness had been beaten out of me by alcohol and I was desperate to stop suffering and I didn't stop my recovery program after 30 days.
I don't find it at all embarrassing to be sober, but I sure was embarrassed a lot when I was still out there. Adapting to sobriety is a day-by-day learning--it's a whole new life. When I first got sober, I thought my life was over and it would be dull and boring, but I found out how screwed up that thinking was.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 337
Welcome! I was worried about what others would think about me not drinking. It has become such an integral part of my life. What I found is that most people don't even notice or don't care if I'm drinking or not. The people who really know me and who know how much I was drinking are proud and supportive--and they are the only ones that matter...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
Everything I know today has had to
be taught to me. At an early age those
older than me set example, good and
bad ones, and I learned from them.
Folks, relatives, customers, employees,
teachers, elders, all those whom I looked
up to did things in their lives I thought
was good or bad and wanted to and did
do myself.
With each thing I did do either came
with a consequence or a lesson learned
to benefit from.
Learning how to live a sober life successfully
had to be taught to me. Just like going to school,
I grabbed my books, supplies, drove myself
to class each day to sit for an hour to listen,
learn, absorbed and apply many lessons to
incorporate in my everyday affairs.
The first month of recovery, I spent
in a rehab facility safe and secured from
the outside elements, temptations, to
allow the toxins in my mind and body
to leave and give me chance for the seeds
of a recovery program to be planted and
absorbed in order to grow and mature
each day I remained sober on the outside.
In order to graduate from high school
or college, one has to pass the exams,
and complete everything asked of them
before entering the field of work you
have studied so hard for, for so many
yrs.
Same thing with living a recovery field,
world, life. I couldnt have become successful
in my recovery life today unless I learned
many lessons each day from those capable
of teaching me those lessons themselves.
With an open mind, willingness and honesty
I took one day at a time, one step at a time,
applying what was being to me in all areas
of my life using that AA template as a guideline.
I will never graduate from this recovery
life because there is always something
new and exciting to learn as I continue
to do maintenance on it so a hurricane,
flood waters, strong winds don't come
upon me and knock down this strong,
stable structure ive been building my
life upon for 26 yrs now.
I will always try to be humble and
teachable thru this process in life
to remain healthy, happy and free
from this addiction of alcohol.
You can too.
be taught to me. At an early age those
older than me set example, good and
bad ones, and I learned from them.
Folks, relatives, customers, employees,
teachers, elders, all those whom I looked
up to did things in their lives I thought
was good or bad and wanted to and did
do myself.
With each thing I did do either came
with a consequence or a lesson learned
to benefit from.
Learning how to live a sober life successfully
had to be taught to me. Just like going to school,
I grabbed my books, supplies, drove myself
to class each day to sit for an hour to listen,
learn, absorbed and apply many lessons to
incorporate in my everyday affairs.
The first month of recovery, I spent
in a rehab facility safe and secured from
the outside elements, temptations, to
allow the toxins in my mind and body
to leave and give me chance for the seeds
of a recovery program to be planted and
absorbed in order to grow and mature
each day I remained sober on the outside.
In order to graduate from high school
or college, one has to pass the exams,
and complete everything asked of them
before entering the field of work you
have studied so hard for, for so many
yrs.
Same thing with living a recovery field,
world, life. I couldnt have become successful
in my recovery life today unless I learned
many lessons each day from those capable
of teaching me those lessons themselves.
With an open mind, willingness and honesty
I took one day at a time, one step at a time,
applying what was being to me in all areas
of my life using that AA template as a guideline.
I will never graduate from this recovery
life because there is always something
new and exciting to learn as I continue
to do maintenance on it so a hurricane,
flood waters, strong winds don't come
upon me and knock down this strong,
stable structure ive been building my
life upon for 26 yrs now.
I will always try to be humble and
teachable thru this process in life
to remain healthy, happy and free
from this addiction of alcohol.
You can too.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
first thing i did was accept that the pain of getting drunk/high had exceeded the pain of reality, decided i was sick and tired of being sick and tired, decided i was willing to go to any lengths for victory over alcohol and drugs,
then went to aa AND worked the program.
it helped me learn to live life on lifes terms, got rid of the embarrassment and guilt, and gave me an awesome life.
did you work the steps or just go to meetings?
then went to aa AND worked the program.
it helped me learn to live life on lifes terms, got rid of the embarrassment and guilt, and gave me an awesome life.
did you work the steps or just go to meetings?
AA Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Silicon Valley
Posts: 2,983
are you 27?
i got here (AA) at 29 ... 54 now and have been sober and very active in AA since
so it is possible
the most important thing i heard when i was new was listen for the similarities and not the differences --- take the good and leave the rest.
unlike most alcoholics i never:
drank in bars
had fun
went to parties
i always drank at home by myself with the drapes closed to escape from:
pain
misery
unhappiness
self hate
so if you dont relate to my story just listen to the people that you do relate to
God bless
i got here (AA) at 29 ... 54 now and have been sober and very active in AA since
so it is possible
the most important thing i heard when i was new was listen for the similarities and not the differences --- take the good and leave the rest.
unlike most alcoholics i never:
drank in bars
had fun
went to parties
i always drank at home by myself with the drapes closed to escape from:
pain
misery
unhappiness
self hate
so if you dont relate to my story just listen to the people that you do relate to
God bless
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,505
Milton, the first thing is stopping drinking.
And, then, I needed to step back and look at myself. I had to remove a few people from my life, including a family member. It often takes changes in friends, hobbies, activities. It's not easy but definitely worth it.
And, then, I needed to step back and look at myself. I had to remove a few people from my life, including a family member. It often takes changes in friends, hobbies, activities. It's not easy but definitely worth it.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Some great advice here Milton - welcome
I'm big on making a recovery plan - here's a link or two to explain what that is and how you might go about it
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
I'm big on making a recovery plan - here's a link or two to explain what that is and how you might go about it
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
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