New to recovery and looking for sober friends!
New to recovery
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Quincy, IL
Posts: 1
New to recovery and looking for sober friends!
After a long time of not admitting I have a problem and going back and forth, I have finally committed 100% to recovery! I am newly sober (8/11/2016) and made it through my birthday without having a single drink! I haven't done that in probably 12 years and I honestly find myself not believing that I could ever have really done it.
I am doing AA, but the meetings I can attend don't have many women or the people who attend are court ordered to do the meetings and just trying to get their paper signed. I have a handful of people actually committed to recovery and the AA way of life and continue to go to meetings and putting myself out there to find support, but figured this could also be a place where I could get support and meet some sober friends.
A little about me if you'd like to keep reading:
I'm 29 years old (as of Sunday) and had my first sober birthday in a long time. I am an alcoholic and in 2011, I got a DUI and blew a .22 and had to do court ordered AA. I was probably half way committed to it. I would go a week or so without drinking and felt "I've earned a drink. If I can go that long, I don’t NEED it, so I’m not an alcoholic". After that, I wouldn’t drive after I’d had even one drink. It did keep me from getting another DUI, but I was still an alcoholic. It essentially ruined my relationship, made me broke and added an extra 4 years on to a 4 year degree. As I'm sure many did, the addiction had me believing that none of this was “my fault”, (even the DUI bc I didn't get pulled over for a traffic violation, but a 'safety check'), but I now realize that all of this was my own doing.
Currently, I am in a relationship with an amazing person. When we met, I was still drinking and he started drinking excessively with me. He started to cut back about 6 months ago, but I was still 'hell on wheels'. After a night of going to the bar by myself because no one could or wanted to go drinking with me, blacking out and ending up at a house where I have NO idea how I got there, I called my bf and said, "Alright, I'm done." At the time, I told myself it was "a break." I just need a break, but maybe I'll be OK to drink in two weeks for my birthday. I mean, how do you EVER celebrate a birthday without drinking?!?!?!? Absurd!
But, after a lot of thought, I decided to do my first sober birthday and managed to get through it, albeit with some tears, super support and a lot of wanting to drink. So, I’m just trying to keep on this journey and make it one day at a time!
I am doing AA, but the meetings I can attend don't have many women or the people who attend are court ordered to do the meetings and just trying to get their paper signed. I have a handful of people actually committed to recovery and the AA way of life and continue to go to meetings and putting myself out there to find support, but figured this could also be a place where I could get support and meet some sober friends.
A little about me if you'd like to keep reading:
I'm 29 years old (as of Sunday) and had my first sober birthday in a long time. I am an alcoholic and in 2011, I got a DUI and blew a .22 and had to do court ordered AA. I was probably half way committed to it. I would go a week or so without drinking and felt "I've earned a drink. If I can go that long, I don’t NEED it, so I’m not an alcoholic". After that, I wouldn’t drive after I’d had even one drink. It did keep me from getting another DUI, but I was still an alcoholic. It essentially ruined my relationship, made me broke and added an extra 4 years on to a 4 year degree. As I'm sure many did, the addiction had me believing that none of this was “my fault”, (even the DUI bc I didn't get pulled over for a traffic violation, but a 'safety check'), but I now realize that all of this was my own doing.
Currently, I am in a relationship with an amazing person. When we met, I was still drinking and he started drinking excessively with me. He started to cut back about 6 months ago, but I was still 'hell on wheels'. After a night of going to the bar by myself because no one could or wanted to go drinking with me, blacking out and ending up at a house where I have NO idea how I got there, I called my bf and said, "Alright, I'm done." At the time, I told myself it was "a break." I just need a break, but maybe I'll be OK to drink in two weeks for my birthday. I mean, how do you EVER celebrate a birthday without drinking?!?!?!? Absurd!
But, after a lot of thought, I decided to do my first sober birthday and managed to get through it, albeit with some tears, super support and a lot of wanting to drink. So, I’m just trying to keep on this journey and make it one day at a time!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 337
Welcome!! Glad you are here! You'll find lots of support on this board. Keep posting and reading. I'm sure you'll find some good friends!!
If you'd like, come join the class of August 2016 support thread. It can be found on the newcomers support board. Someone who knows how will probably post a link for you... (Pretty please??)
If you'd like, come join the class of August 2016 support thread. It can be found on the newcomers support board. Someone who knows how will probably post a link for you... (Pretty please??)
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome.
Yes, all those firsts can be tricky. It often takes quite a bit of effort to reinforce our plan of recovery around these events by thinking of news and diffrent ways to have fun and celebrate. I found Christmas the biggie, but actually since I've made an effort to get involved in different Christmas events and activities by volunteering for different things and treating myself to panto tickets or similar, trying new and different recipes for Christmas goodies, and being more involved with my (much neglected) family, regardless of what my still-drinking partner does (which is generally quite predictable - ie get drunk) - actually it's better than it evrytime was.
Yes, all those firsts can be tricky. It often takes quite a bit of effort to reinforce our plan of recovery around these events by thinking of news and diffrent ways to have fun and celebrate. I found Christmas the biggie, but actually since I've made an effort to get involved in different Christmas events and activities by volunteering for different things and treating myself to panto tickets or similar, trying new and different recipes for Christmas goodies, and being more involved with my (much neglected) family, regardless of what my still-drinking partner does (which is generally quite predictable - ie get drunk) - actually it's better than it evrytime was.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boston Ma
Posts: 980
Back at work with my long term friends, I sat out going to the back-to- school soirée , shower for a colleague, but truth is I always have sat those out. In the past I didn't go because I wouldn't drink and drive, this time just not ready to be in a crowd even if many don't even drink. Soon I will because I like these people and they make me laugh, I haven't done a lot of that lately.
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