Hi, everyone. I didn't fall off the wagon this time
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 403
Hi, everyone. I didn't fall off the wagon this time
Just popping in to say "hi". Usually, when I don't post, it means I'm drinking again. I'm coming up on three months--the longest time yet. I'm happy and healthy, but I still need some tests after my time in the hospital (well, after my long stint of drinking).
Things are better with family, but I can't shake the guilt of some of the things I did. I didn't get DUIs, physically hurt people, etc., but the things I did were egregious and still haunt me. They haunt the people to whom I inflicted these things--kids and husband. I hope time will heal these wounds.
Since getting sober, I cleaned up my financial act (mostly very behind on bills--surprise, surprise), got my house organized and remodeled on the cheap, etc. There was an apartment I lived in with my family for a year back a few years ago. it was mostly a weekend haunt due to jobs, etc., but I was drunk a good majority of the time. I never bothered to really deep clean or organize, at least in my bedroom. It remained a mess for a year. I can't believe the utter waste of years of my life.
Kids are still angry. I'm not really close with them, sadly. They are teens. There are deeper issues not related to alcohol, but alcohol is the newest, and I've mentioned before, that neither the husband or kids are really supportive. They see it as a major moral failing.
I quit IOP for more reasons than one with logistics being the main one. It never grew on me and seemed to be a big waste of time. It's been over a month. I haven't gotten in AA, but I've seen my doctor and she's referring me to someone who specializes in addiction, so I'll start with that. It will be one-on-one therapy.
Things are better with family, but I can't shake the guilt of some of the things I did. I didn't get DUIs, physically hurt people, etc., but the things I did were egregious and still haunt me. They haunt the people to whom I inflicted these things--kids and husband. I hope time will heal these wounds.
Since getting sober, I cleaned up my financial act (mostly very behind on bills--surprise, surprise), got my house organized and remodeled on the cheap, etc. There was an apartment I lived in with my family for a year back a few years ago. it was mostly a weekend haunt due to jobs, etc., but I was drunk a good majority of the time. I never bothered to really deep clean or organize, at least in my bedroom. It remained a mess for a year. I can't believe the utter waste of years of my life.
Kids are still angry. I'm not really close with them, sadly. They are teens. There are deeper issues not related to alcohol, but alcohol is the newest, and I've mentioned before, that neither the husband or kids are really supportive. They see it as a major moral failing.
I quit IOP for more reasons than one with logistics being the main one. It never grew on me and seemed to be a big waste of time. It's been over a month. I haven't gotten in AA, but I've seen my doctor and she's referring me to someone who specializes in addiction, so I'll start with that. It will be one-on-one therapy.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
Three months is awesome notgonnastoptry 
try not to dwell on the guilt - fix/amend what you can and focus the rest of your energies on today - today's the most important day....for us all
D
try not to dwell on the guilt - fix/amend what you can and focus the rest of your energies on today - today's the most important day....for us all
D
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