Waiting weeks for treatment
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 380
Waiting weeks for treatment
Why can't it just be easygoing? I've gone through detox (self detox, I should know better by now). But up to 4 weeks to wait?. This is part of instant gratification, I know. I'm ready for a spot in treatment, why aren't they welcoming me with open arms?
Selfish, like all my drinking has been. So I need a way, a plan, to get through a few weeks.
Again selfish, but it's just hard to think I'm here, ready to go, no one ready to accept. Some places had a 6 month wait list. I'll do this, I reached out to work today, my biggest fear, but without dates, not much they can do. I still think it will cost me my job, in a round about way. I can't worry about that anymore.
Any thoughts, advice, support?
Selfish, like all my drinking has been. So I need a way, a plan, to get through a few weeks.
Again selfish, but it's just hard to think I'm here, ready to go, no one ready to accept. Some places had a 6 month wait list. I'll do this, I reached out to work today, my biggest fear, but without dates, not much they can do. I still think it will cost me my job, in a round about way. I can't worry about that anymore.
Any thoughts, advice, support?
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Casper, WY
Posts: 287
Why can't they accept you with open arms? They are...as well as every other person that needs help and seeks it there.
There's lots of us. Don't get blinded by terminal uniqueness.
You might do better to ask yourself how you can make these four weeks productive toward your recovery. Got any ideas?
There's lots of us. Don't get blinded by terminal uniqueness.
You might do better to ask yourself how you can make these four weeks productive toward your recovery. Got any ideas?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Are AA or SMART meetings or the like an option for you?
Could also read through Dee's links on this thread...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Could also read through Dee's links on this thread...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 380
I definitely recognize this as terminal uniqueness. That's what's crazy, I know better, or I should, shame on me.
I've never found a different type of meeting than AA in my area. I may look into it again, the place I'm going is 12 step based. I haven't done well with AA yet, but I really take that on myself. I comparison shop. Not as bad as you, much worse than you, etc. I need to recognize NO ONE is in my exact spot, but we're all in the same boat, addiction. I need to get out of my head.
Thank you for the thoughtful replies.
I've never found a different type of meeting than AA in my area. I may look into it again, the place I'm going is 12 step based. I haven't done well with AA yet, but I really take that on myself. I comparison shop. Not as bad as you, much worse than you, etc. I need to recognize NO ONE is in my exact spot, but we're all in the same boat, addiction. I need to get out of my head.
Thank you for the thoughtful replies.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
The thought that came to my mind was that this whole deal isn't about getting through four weeks, or even four weeks and treatment. It is about getting through the rest of your life. Treatment may get you started, but it is not designed to fix you for life. So maybe use the four weeks to get started on a plan for the rest of your life?
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
There are really only two things in AA that count, and they ain't the stories. We all have different stories. The two things are loss of the power of choice, and the phenomenon of craving. If you got them, you are qualified.
You put ten drinking alcoholics in a room and give them some drinks. A couple will dance, a couple will tell jokes, a couple will get all quiet, a couple will get in a fight. The one thing they have in common is they will all reach for another drink.
You put ten drinking alcoholics in a room and give them some drinks. A couple will dance, a couple will tell jokes, a couple will get all quiet, a couple will get in a fight. The one thing they have in common is they will all reach for another drink.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
youre not even there and saying they arent welcoming you. pretty unrational dont you think?
when you do get there, i highly encourage you to not have any expectations other than help finding the underlying issues.
you have 4 weeks before, which could seem an eternity, which you can start the work now. as gottalife said, this is about the rest of your life,which starts today, not in 4 weeks.
when you do get there, i highly encourage you to not have any expectations other than help finding the underlying issues.
you have 4 weeks before, which could seem an eternity, which you can start the work now. as gottalife said, this is about the rest of your life,which starts today, not in 4 weeks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 380
Tomsteve, please go back and read my post and don't put things in such 'You Suck' kind of terms. I clearly recognize how ridiculous my thoughts and feelings are. But they are my feelings for good or bad.
Sorry, guess I'm being hateful this morning.
Maybe I didn't articulate well, just looking for support to be sober for a few weeks before I get into treatment and get hands on help to get through and thrive.
Sorry, guess I'm being hateful this morning.
Maybe I didn't articulate well, just looking for support to be sober for a few weeks before I get into treatment and get hands on help to get through and thrive.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Hi MovingForward
I don't think anyone's saying you suck...some of the best messages I've had here have been blunt ones - they tend to stay with you, lol.
To me the real message and the real gist of whats been said here is while rehab can be a useful break from normal life, it's not a magic pill - rehab ends and you'll be back in normal life...whatever path you go by will take a lot of work, so why not start now
But...yeah I take your point - it was clear to me that you're already aware of a need for immediate gratification, a certain sense of entitlement etc...
and truth be told there's not one of us here who hasn't experienced those feelings themselves back in the day
There's a great demand for recovery resources - even no frills things like a salvation army rehab can have a waiting list these days.
It is what it is..until things change.
What recovery has given me is a patience, and a faith that things will turn out ok...if I do the right things.
and there's a lot of right things you can start on right now
The basic right thing, at least initially, is not drinking.
There's a lot of support here.
I recommend you post here regularly, certainly daily if not more. You might also like to check out the Class of August support thread.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html
There's also a good amount of links that might help you. I really recommend making a recovery plan:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
and this is a great link on cravings:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
This is a pretty good read too:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html
Look forward to seeing you around
D
I don't think anyone's saying you suck...some of the best messages I've had here have been blunt ones - they tend to stay with you, lol.
To me the real message and the real gist of whats been said here is while rehab can be a useful break from normal life, it's not a magic pill - rehab ends and you'll be back in normal life...whatever path you go by will take a lot of work, so why not start now
But...yeah I take your point - it was clear to me that you're already aware of a need for immediate gratification, a certain sense of entitlement etc...
and truth be told there's not one of us here who hasn't experienced those feelings themselves back in the day
There's a great demand for recovery resources - even no frills things like a salvation army rehab can have a waiting list these days.
It is what it is..until things change.
What recovery has given me is a patience, and a faith that things will turn out ok...if I do the right things.
and there's a lot of right things you can start on right now
The basic right thing, at least initially, is not drinking.
There's a lot of support here.
I recommend you post here regularly, certainly daily if not more. You might also like to check out the Class of August support thread.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html
There's also a good amount of links that might help you. I really recommend making a recovery plan:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
and this is a great link on cravings:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
This is a pretty good read too:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html
Look forward to seeing you around
D
Last edited by Dee74; 08-16-2016 at 05:28 AM.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by MovingForward1 
Tomsteve, please go back and read my post and don't put things in such 'You Suck' kind of terms. I clearly recognize how ridiculous my thoughts and feelings are. But they are my feelings for good or bad.
Sorry, guess I'm being hateful this morning.
Maybe I didn't articulate well, just looking for support to be sober for a few weeks before I get into treatment and get hands on help to get through and thrive.
Sorry, guess I'm being hateful this morning.
Maybe I didn't articulate well, just looking for support to be sober for a few weeks before I get into treatment and get hands on help to get through and thrive.
what i did say is i care,gave my thoughts,advise, and support as you asked.
i understand your reaction,tho. i was pretty sensitive myself and if the message given me wasnt all cuddly and warm i got aggitated,too.
and when the message wasnt all cuddly and warm and i got mad about it-THAT was the message i needed to hear because it was the truth.
still happens sometimes today even.
you asked why cant it be easy going. whether you go to rehab today or in 4 weeks, its not going to be easy. thats just the straight up truthful fact.
but everything WILL get easier.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Casper, WY
Posts: 287
I found, when in mega rural Wyoming as I am now until I return to Denver, that there are numerous online meetings and resources for AA and other meetings. It didn't fix me, but it was a first right thing.
You've said it yourself...you're living in a mindset of uniqueness. The sensitivity is part of it, and I've been there.
Look, after years of being a liar, cheat, thief, and all around scoundrel (I'm using the G-rated list today), I was pretty sensitive as well. It's a tough spot to be in to know intellectually that I can be a better individual, but look at my history and have pretty damning evidence to the contrary. It took me time and concerted effort to change my thinking, my actions, and my perceptions. Pretty soon, I found that typically, I wasn't a victim, but almost always a volunteer. If I have a problem, I'm part of it.
("Could be holdin' you tonight...could quit doin' wrong and start doin' right...'
God bless Merle Haggard.)
Use this four weeks wisely. I did a 90 day inpatient program in the spring of 2012 with about 25 day wait till my bed was open. I drank up till the night before I got in. Upon entr, my attitude was very much "I need help, and here's how I expect you to help me." Get this, I did so awesome with that mindset that I went back for another trip through the same facility 18 months later. Go alcoholic thinking Austin!
I haven't been back to an inpatient facility since. The second time, I had 21 days until I could get in. I used that time to go to AA, to become teachable, and to realize that MY methods weren't working. If I could have fixed it myself, why didn't I?
Keep calm, man. If you REALLY, TRULY want to change, it can start now, not in four weeks. Nobody forced my poor decisions, but plenty of people encouraged my good ones. Take that to heart and start with that NEXT right thing, and I bet you'll be amazed at where you're at when you get to treatment.
You've said it yourself...you're living in a mindset of uniqueness. The sensitivity is part of it, and I've been there.
Look, after years of being a liar, cheat, thief, and all around scoundrel (I'm using the G-rated list today), I was pretty sensitive as well. It's a tough spot to be in to know intellectually that I can be a better individual, but look at my history and have pretty damning evidence to the contrary. It took me time and concerted effort to change my thinking, my actions, and my perceptions. Pretty soon, I found that typically, I wasn't a victim, but almost always a volunteer. If I have a problem, I'm part of it.
("Could be holdin' you tonight...could quit doin' wrong and start doin' right...'
God bless Merle Haggard.)
Use this four weeks wisely. I did a 90 day inpatient program in the spring of 2012 with about 25 day wait till my bed was open. I drank up till the night before I got in. Upon entr, my attitude was very much "I need help, and here's how I expect you to help me." Get this, I did so awesome with that mindset that I went back for another trip through the same facility 18 months later. Go alcoholic thinking Austin!
I haven't been back to an inpatient facility since. The second time, I had 21 days until I could get in. I used that time to go to AA, to become teachable, and to realize that MY methods weren't working. If I could have fixed it myself, why didn't I?
Keep calm, man. If you REALLY, TRULY want to change, it can start now, not in four weeks. Nobody forced my poor decisions, but plenty of people encouraged my good ones. Take that to heart and start with that NEXT right thing, and I bet you'll be amazed at where you're at when you get to treatment.
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
^^^ THIS.
I know you want immediate gratification. That's what all alcoholics want. Well, you can have some by starting to go to meetings and working some sort of program now. Keep an open mind about AA - don't think of it as your "only option" because then you'll go through the doors wishing you could be doing something different. Think of it as your "best option." You say you haven't done well with it in the past. Well, you are different now - you are in a different spot mentally, right? So give it another try. You don't have to say anything if you don't want to. You can just listen. You never know when someone is going to say something that hits a nerve.
Are you on a waiting list for treatment? You never know, you might get in sooner. But I think you should start taking action now. You have nothing to lose, except the desire to drink.
I know you want immediate gratification. That's what all alcoholics want. Well, you can have some by starting to go to meetings and working some sort of program now. Keep an open mind about AA - don't think of it as your "only option" because then you'll go through the doors wishing you could be doing something different. Think of it as your "best option." You say you haven't done well with it in the past. Well, you are different now - you are in a different spot mentally, right? So give it another try. You don't have to say anything if you don't want to. You can just listen. You never know when someone is going to say something that hits a nerve.
Are you on a waiting list for treatment? You never know, you might get in sooner. But I think you should start taking action now. You have nothing to lose, except the desire to drink.
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