Experience of anger
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Join Date: Jul 2016
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Experience of anger
Hey everyone! I am going on 40 days tomorrow. I have wanted that long of sobriety for a long time and what I have been feeling this week isn't what I had expected. This is the 2nd day this week I have felt such anger. I can't exactly figure out why. I'm sure it's just a compilation of so many things but I am not usually an angry person. I've had to laugh at myself this week like "whoa calm down". Is this a normal experience? I'm just so confused and have given up something that I had done quite often and I have wanted to just cry and let all these emotions out but I can't even shed a tear. *deep breath* I'll surely be glad when I feel a sense of freedom!
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
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Maybe your anger is not expressed through crying usually...but maybe one reason you have felt closer to crying is anger....OR it could just be early sobriety. I remember my emotions feeling really RAW. Including anger. Speaking for myself I tend to cry when I'm really angry. I've been this that way since I can remember. But, I also cry when I'm frustrated, but frustration can cause me to feel angry. If I trace anger back to its origin it is usually rooted in hurt/pain.
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I wish I could cry. Seems like I could release some sort of emotion. I cried so hard on July 3rd and I stopped drinking and it's like the tears stopped there. I know I am feeling a raw emotion but I wonder why it has to be a fit of rage in my soul. It's not like I act on it but I could seriously punch something hahaha! Oh well, least I chuckled to myself out loud driving cause I was thinking irrationally. All I can think of is maybe I'm mad I'm an alcoholic and can't drink normally and the stress of forming a new life. I also love to excersise and I broke my foot like 20 days ago or something like that and I haven't been able to get my energy out with running or doing spin.
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Join Date: Jul 2016
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Hey Linz, My primary emotion during my last year drinking was most certainly anger. I felt betrayed, abandoned, humiliated, etc.
But the truth is that I've always been a little angry most of my life, and although I despise injustice (social, political or otherwise), I'm trying to understand that angry person, because being angry all the time is pretty sad. What's weird is that I'm more likely to forgive others than I am myself.
They say that anger begins with fear, Maybe we should simply ask "what are we afraid of?" Right now I'm afraid of the unexpected.
But the truth is that I've always been a little angry most of my life, and although I despise injustice (social, political or otherwise), I'm trying to understand that angry person, because being angry all the time is pretty sad. What's weird is that I'm more likely to forgive others than I am myself.
They say that anger begins with fear, Maybe we should simply ask "what are we afraid of?" Right now I'm afraid of the unexpected.
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Join Date: Jul 2016
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Broken foot and no exercise!!! YES. I have 2 fractured toes that aren't mending well, and if I don't get back to my beloved work-outs soon I may have to kick the stupid podiatrist when I see him in a few weeks (with my good toes) 
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Originally Posted by Dame 
Hey Linz, My primary emotion during my last year drinking was most certainly anger. I felt betrayed, abandoned, humiliated, etc.
But the truth is that I've always been a little angry most of my life, and although I despise injustice (social, political or otherwise), I'm trying to understand that angry person, because being angry all the time is pretty sad. What's weird is that I'm more likely to forgive others than I am myself.
They say that anger begins with fear, Maybe we should simply ask "what are we afraid of?" Right now I'm afraid of the unexpected.
But the truth is that I've always been a little angry most of my life, and although I despise injustice (social, political or otherwise), I'm trying to understand that angry person, because being angry all the time is pretty sad. What's weird is that I'm more likely to forgive others than I am myself.
They say that anger begins with fear, Maybe we should simply ask "what are we afraid of?" Right now I'm afraid of the unexpected.
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Join Date: Jul 2016
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Originally Posted by Dame
Broken foot and no exercise!!! YES. I have 2 fractured toes that aren't mending well, and if I don't get back to my beloved work-outs soon I may have to kick the stupid podiatrist when I see him in a few weeks (with my good toes)
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Join Date: Aug 2011
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It could be that your anger is a symptom of post acute withdrawal syndrome (PAWS), particularly when it seems to come out of nowhere and is not attached to any specific event.
I had times in early sobriety (mostly within the first year) where I had what I called "anger in search of a target". I believe it was mostly biologically based.
The essential thing was not to act on it.
I had times in early sobriety (mostly within the first year) where I had what I called "anger in search of a target". I believe it was mostly biologically based.
The essential thing was not to act on it.
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Originally Posted by awuh1
It could be that your anger is a symptom of post acute withdrawal syndrome (PAWS), particularly when it seems to come out of nowhere and is not attached to any specific event.
I had times in early sobriety (mostly within the first year) where I had what I called "anger in search of a target". I believe it was mostly biologically based.
The essential thing was not to act on it.
I had times in early sobriety (mostly within the first year) where I had what I called "anger in search of a target". I believe it was mostly biologically based.
The essential thing was not to act on it.
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One thing during this 40 days though that I am pleased with is although I am feeling all kinds of negative feelings at times I KNOW alcohol is not the answer. It is not going to fix anything!! And I am now on a journey to figure out what will help me . I tried alcohol for many many years and it got me nowhere so ok... Let's try something else!
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Originally Posted by teatreeoil007
Broken foot? That truly sucks! Sorry to hear that. How did it happen? How frustrating!
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Join Date: Aug 2015
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I think its a stage lots of us go through in early sobriety ,Ive saw this posted quite a lot .
I went through the angry weepy, wild emotion swings . For example I couldn't wait in a queue at the shops , I'd drop things and walk out .
It did pass with some time with these episodes becoming fewer and less intense .
I went through the angry weepy, wild emotion swings . For example I couldn't wait in a queue at the shops , I'd drop things and walk out .
It did pass with some time with these episodes becoming fewer and less intense .
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I think we bury our anger in alcohol and when removed the anger emerges. Healthy in a way.....it's real. Thing is to understand and deal with it in sobriety. Anger is a normal emotion....born out of fear and hurt imo.
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Join Date: Oct 2012
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Speaking from my own experience, bursts of irrational anger are part and parcel of early recovery. In retrospect I think my AV was throwing a tantrum. The irritability was bad enough that I shocked myself occasionally but the good news it it will pass.
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Early recovery is known as an emotional rollercoaster because of the feelings & emotions we experience during this time - an ever better reason to be reading & posting regularly on SR
Congratulations on day 40 Linz
Congratulations on day 40 Linz
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Yes. I remember that. Don't know you, so all I can tell you is MY experience. And that was that I realised that I had a tendency to transfer any negative emotions into anger. So, if I'm scared, I flip it into angry. Jealous? Turns into anger. Disappointed, oh yes, straight into anger. Sad? The same. At the start of sobriety I was so befuddled and raw that I was doing this without even noticing what I was doing. Now, with a couple of years sobriety and recovery under my belt, I'm getting a little better at recognising those initial emotions and dealing with them, or at least being able to be aware of what I'm doing.
I suppose anger, for me, has always felt kind of powerful, and therefore like the safest of all negative emotions. So, when I was feeling out of control, and lonely and scared when I first got sober, I suppose anger seem, subconsciously, the way to go. People say that we emotional stop developing so well once we hit the drinking hard. So I was probably stuck in teenage mode for a long time, and my temper has always stayed snatch like a teen. But that rage in early sobriety? ? Well that was madness, even for me. Lol. Thankfully I worked past it.
I suppose anger, for me, has always felt kind of powerful, and therefore like the safest of all negative emotions. So, when I was feeling out of control, and lonely and scared when I first got sober, I suppose anger seem, subconsciously, the way to go. People say that we emotional stop developing so well once we hit the drinking hard. So I was probably stuck in teenage mode for a long time, and my temper has always stayed snatch like a teen. But that rage in early sobriety? ? Well that was madness, even for me. Lol. Thankfully I worked past it.
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Originally Posted by Steely
I think we bury our anger in alcohol and when removed the anger emerges. Healthy in a way.....it's real. Thing is to understand and deal with it in sobriety. Anger is a normal emotion....born out of fear and hurt imo.
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All good stuff!! Thanks for the responses. Newly sober I guess I am not quite sure what it all means but thru time I will figure it out. It's so true that we drink and any time we felt anything negative or even good that's when I would have a cocktail and now I don't have that. Which is fine! I think a lot of it can come with fear from this whole process. I am not feeling (at this moment) rage but a mental mind set of today is going to be a good day. What a roller coaster lol.
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