5 Days Sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 7
5 Days Sober
Hi All.
It's taken me a long time (and many shameful episodes) to admit that I am indeed an alcoholic. I knew I had a growing problem, but was very good at convincing myself that I could stop whenever I wanted, I just didn't want to. Ha! The withdrawals and many relapses to stop the withdrawals have proven otherwise.
My job luckily hasn't been affected, nor have I ever driven drunk, but I have hurt my family with the lies about my problem, the withdrawing from them so they wouldn't know I was drinking, the hiding of bottles and paranoia about being found out.
I've had 3 relapses since my drinking was originally discovered by my family...But I now feel ready to face this demon head-on and beat it. I have the family and therapist support I've needed for so long and now I have found this place as an additional resource to help me through the rough spots and stay on course to better my health, my mind and my life.
Sorry this was so long, but I thank you for this site and for taking the time to read a little of my story.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step....This is mine.
It's taken me a long time (and many shameful episodes) to admit that I am indeed an alcoholic. I knew I had a growing problem, but was very good at convincing myself that I could stop whenever I wanted, I just didn't want to. Ha! The withdrawals and many relapses to stop the withdrawals have proven otherwise.
My job luckily hasn't been affected, nor have I ever driven drunk, but I have hurt my family with the lies about my problem, the withdrawing from them so they wouldn't know I was drinking, the hiding of bottles and paranoia about being found out.
I've had 3 relapses since my drinking was originally discovered by my family...But I now feel ready to face this demon head-on and beat it. I have the family and therapist support I've needed for so long and now I have found this place as an additional resource to help me through the rough spots and stay on course to better my health, my mind and my life.
Sorry this was so long, but I thank you for this site and for taking the time to read a little of my story.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step....This is mine.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 79
Well done on making the decision to quit, and glad you found us. Stay close to this board and read all you can. I'm on day 4 myself, with many many relapses under my belt, and the shame of it all just like you. But being here is helping me immensely.
There is an August 2016 group thread if you want to join and share/support with others on the same or similar timeline as you (me included).
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-1-a.html
Good luck!
There is an August 2016 group thread if you want to join and share/support with others on the same or similar timeline as you (me included).
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-1-a.html
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
Hi, AHutch. I have never admitted to anyone, except you good people here at SR, that I am an alcoholic. Not to my wife. Not to my family.
But I said it here. And I admitted it to myself. That was a huge step for me. It made me feel much better. It was a relief, actually. And it was a big part of my recovery.
In my humble opinion, it isn't necessary to admit others that you are an alcoholic - or even to tell them that you are trying to stop drinking. For me anyway, it was a private struggle, and it worked for me to keep it private.
Anyway, congratulations on Day 5. You are off to a great start. And welcome to SR. I am glad to have you join us on this sober journey.
But I said it here. And I admitted it to myself. That was a huge step for me. It made me feel much better. It was a relief, actually. And it was a big part of my recovery.
In my humble opinion, it isn't necessary to admit others that you are an alcoholic - or even to tell them that you are trying to stop drinking. For me anyway, it was a private struggle, and it worked for me to keep it private.
Anyway, congratulations on Day 5. You are off to a great start. And welcome to SR. I am glad to have you join us on this sober journey.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 7
Thank you everyone. I'm really glad to have found this place.
It's so hard for people who haven't been in our shoes to understand how difficult this is. How addiction messes with your head....convincing you that you are ok when you are so far from it. Convincing you that one drink won't hurt anything (or anyone). I lived a long time before alcohol became a regular part of my life, so I know it's possible to live life and be happy without it. I just need to fight to get back there and having people in the same battle helps a lot!
I think my biggest issue will come with family get-togethers where drinking is very common. So far only my husband, daughter and therapist know what I am dealing with and honestly I'd like to keep it that way. Avoiding the get-togethers isn't really an option (luckily they only happen a few times a year) so I am wondering if anyone has advice on how to not drink without explaining myself when offered? Saying I don't feel well or am not in the mood won't work for the long term. Saying I've decided to quit will invite questions.....maybe it's just inevitable that I have to come clean (no pun intended), but hopefully someone will have some good ideas
It's so hard for people who haven't been in our shoes to understand how difficult this is. How addiction messes with your head....convincing you that you are ok when you are so far from it. Convincing you that one drink won't hurt anything (or anyone). I lived a long time before alcohol became a regular part of my life, so I know it's possible to live life and be happy without it. I just need to fight to get back there and having people in the same battle helps a lot!
I think my biggest issue will come with family get-togethers where drinking is very common. So far only my husband, daughter and therapist know what I am dealing with and honestly I'd like to keep it that way. Avoiding the get-togethers isn't really an option (luckily they only happen a few times a year) so I am wondering if anyone has advice on how to not drink without explaining myself when offered? Saying I don't feel well or am not in the mood won't work for the long term. Saying I've decided to quit will invite questions.....maybe it's just inevitable that I have to come clean (no pun intended), but hopefully someone will have some good ideas
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 7
Firstymer, I am with you on the keeping it private. I just don't feel it's anyones business for the most part. I did admit I am an alcoholic to my husband and daughter because after what I have put them through I felt they deserved to hear me say it. Admitting it to myself was definitely a relief though. Once I was honest with myself I had a starting point to begin making the changes I have to make to get to where I want and need to be.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,981
I also have told pretty much no one about my alcohol problem except for one person, and I know they mean well, but someone who hasent personally been a drunk, doesn't understand the hell and power the booze can have over us. Outlets like SR are amazing and truly helpful
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 387
AHutch,
Welcome. To answer your question on a family get together, if you do a search on this site you will find plenty of advice. One way is to simply fill a glass with something non-alcoholic but looks alcoholic and keep holding it.
Personally, I just tell people that I'm not drinking and I really don't care what they think next, the reason being that it doesn't matter if I tell them that I'm an alcoholic or not because they already know.
Great job on 5 days. Celebrate every new day!
KP
Welcome. To answer your question on a family get together, if you do a search on this site you will find plenty of advice. One way is to simply fill a glass with something non-alcoholic but looks alcoholic and keep holding it.
Personally, I just tell people that I'm not drinking and I really don't care what they think next, the reason being that it doesn't matter if I tell them that I'm an alcoholic or not because they already know.
Great job on 5 days. Celebrate every new day!
KP
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
ahutch,
Hi and welcome.
Find the non drinkers in the group.
My family is filled w drinkers and non drinkers.
My aunt and uncle have never drank. So I fit in w them.
It is sort of a sick comedy now watching the drinkers get more and more drunk.
There is no envy there. The drunks actually look pretty sad in the drunken state.
Humans are not designed to drink alcohol. It fries our brain eventually.
Hi and welcome.
Find the non drinkers in the group.
My family is filled w drinkers and non drinkers.
My aunt and uncle have never drank. So I fit in w them.
It is sort of a sick comedy now watching the drinkers get more and more drunk.
There is no envy there. The drunks actually look pretty sad in the drunken state.
Humans are not designed to drink alcohol. It fries our brain eventually.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 7
Thanks for the advice and warm wishes! I am now on day 9 and doing ok The weekend had a few rough spots, mostly when I was feeling bored, but I got through them! Even had several hours home alone (when I would normally sneak in some alcohol) and did not touch a drop. Feels good! Happy Monday everyone!
The weekend had a few rough spots, mostly when I was feeling bored, but I got through them! Even had several hours home alone (when I would normally sneak in some alcohol) and did not touch a drop. Feels good! Happy Monday everyone!
I look young for my age.
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 932
Congratulations on getting through the weekend, AHutch! Those were always full of triggers for me as well. No one looks forward to Monday, but they suck a lot less when you've had a sober weekend.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 123
Originally Posted by AHutch 
Avoiding the get-togethers isn't really an option (luckily they only happen a few times a year) so I am wondering if anyone has advice on how to not drink without explaining myself when offered?
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