Be as you are Weekender August 5th Part 1
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Be as you are Weekender August 5th Part 1
I was the quiet guy in the corner if I showed up at all. I spoke soft. A low talker as they called me. When someone did want to hear what I had to say I stuttered because I was not used to speaking my mind. Yup... My early 20's you would not have known me.
On top of that I was angry. Bitter angry at that age. Life betrayed me until that point and I knew it. I wanted nothing to do with society or family or people.
Not being a drinker until I was around 30, I then found out that if I drank I could be who I was inside. Yeah I see you grinning like that was you too. It's the most common of our alcoholic traits. Freedom in a bottle. Until. There is always an until for our kind.
I wish the circle to get here was not so damn wide. That it would take this long to get here. But since I am here and so many of the addicted never do, I cannot be indifferent to my arrival. None of us can.
I saw this song and it moved me. It said how I felt for so long and reminded me that I can be as I am. In every way I can or want. Being sober today allows that.
Sobriety in itself does not grant that to me. But the struggles of addiction gave me the understanding to see it now.
Be as you are this weekend. You can open up sober. You can have fun again. You can love again. More importantly... You can BE loved again.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
On top of that I was angry. Bitter angry at that age. Life betrayed me until that point and I knew it. I wanted nothing to do with society or family or people.
Not being a drinker until I was around 30, I then found out that if I drank I could be who I was inside. Yeah I see you grinning like that was you too. It's the most common of our alcoholic traits. Freedom in a bottle. Until. There is always an until for our kind.
I wish the circle to get here was not so damn wide. That it would take this long to get here. But since I am here and so many of the addicted never do, I cannot be indifferent to my arrival. None of us can.
I saw this song and it moved me. It said how I felt for so long and reminded me that I can be as I am. In every way I can or want. Being sober today allows that.
Sobriety in itself does not grant that to me. But the struggles of addiction gave me the understanding to see it now.
Be as you are this weekend. You can open up sober. You can have fun again. You can love again. More importantly... You can BE loved again.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
I just wanted to share that there is a section on the home page of this forum that speaks to the number of threads, members and when most users were on at the same time.
Well.... Most users online at one time was 2,208 (08-27-2012 at 12:47 PM).
I was online at the moment I saw this happen. I was at my desk scared and hung over and fearing everything around me that day, that moment in time.
It's always struck me as odd that something was recorded at a moment when I was so desperate. Something I can return to and feel that time again. My old posts are like that but far more terrifying to read again. This is enough a reminder.
Be as you are.
K
Well.... Most users online at one time was 2,208 (08-27-2012 at 12:47 PM).
I was online at the moment I saw this happen. I was at my desk scared and hung over and fearing everything around me that day, that moment in time.
It's always struck me as odd that something was recorded at a moment when I was so desperate. Something I can return to and feel that time again. My old posts are like that but far more terrifying to read again. This is enough a reminder.
Be as you are.
K
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
Thanks Ken, I am in!
A thought that comes to mind:
I've done a lot of soul searching this time through. I considered why I started drinking in the first place. The answer was exactly what you said Ken.
Then, I really thought about it. When I drank, even in the beginning, the end result was not who I was inside. It was who I was under the influence of alcohol.
After 30 years I am finally on the journey of finding out who I really am. What a relief.
Taking the journey with all of you makes it all that much more sweet.
A thought that comes to mind:
I then found out that if I drank I could be who I was inside
Then, I really thought about it. When I drank, even in the beginning, the end result was not who I was inside. It was who I was under the influence of alcohol.
After 30 years I am finally on the journey of finding out who I really am. What a relief.
Taking the journey with all of you makes it all that much more sweet.
EnjoyingTheJourney
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 3,847
Thank you Ken. I'm in!
Feeling a bit blah lately and need to step up my game and recovery. Drinking made me the life of the party .....until I wasn't.
No thoughts of drinking now.....just blah. What happened to the pink cloud?????
Feeling a bit blah lately and need to step up my game and recovery. Drinking made me the life of the party .....until I wasn't.
No thoughts of drinking now.....just blah. What happened to the pink cloud?????
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Domhan
Posts: 1,974
I'm in.
Woke to some great news this morning friends. My lil' sis gave birth to a beautiful baby girl after midnight! Junior will have a cousin close in age to hang with. We are going to drive down on Saturday to see them all.
I am simply beside myself with the joy of it!!!
B
Woke to some great news this morning friends. My lil' sis gave birth to a beautiful baby girl after midnight! Junior will have a cousin close in age to hang with. We are going to drive down on Saturday to see them all.
I am simply beside myself with the joy of it!!!
B
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,184
In!
Great opening post as ever Ken - booze for us trades short term pleasure for long term misery
Congratulations on shotgun Soberwolf
It is coworker Dizzee's birthday today, she has already left for the pub. I will have to go myself later. Dizzee and her friends are convivial company which makes it harder to leave early
She is wearing a blue and white combo today that makes her look like Smurfette - i would not dare say that out loud Lol!
Great opening post as ever Ken - booze for us trades short term pleasure for long term misery
Congratulations on shotgun Soberwolf
It is coworker Dizzee's birthday today, she has already left for the pub. I will have to go myself later. Dizzee and her friends are convivial company which makes it harder to leave early
She is wearing a blue and white combo today that makes her look like Smurfette - i would not dare say that out loud Lol!
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