Hammers

Hi,

I am a 48 year old man living in Switzerland. I am
a citizen of the Republic of Ireland.

I have been alcohol dependant since my early
thirties. Until two years ago I could manage it.
Manage it as any alcoholic can. Last two years
it is out of control.

Since monday night, I have eaten nothing, drank
a litre of Jack Daniels, 18 cans of beer, three bottles
of red wine and a bottle of sparkling wine.

I am not in denial. I have a massive problem, and
I am fully aware of it.

I have to stop. I can't go to a doctor. In Switzerland
our health records are public information, not
private.

I really need help...

Thanks,
Nick.

Mags1

Hi Nick, welcome to SR.

darkstarpa

Hammers,

You have found a place to post and seek support.
I have recently been going through what I call step #1. seeking support and guidance.
My history is similar due to alcohol.

darkstarpa

PS. Eat some food!

Dee74

Hi Nick
welcome to SR

I don't know anything about Swiss records but I do know wikthdrawal can be tough sometimes.

I hope you'll reconsider if you feel unwell.

Forgive the bluntness, but I'd rather be on a medical record than a cemetery one.

D

Hammers

Thank you for your replies. I really can’t speak to a
doctor here. I may go back to Ireland to see one.

I understand the point of a record or cemetery,
I really do.

Unfortunatley, my medical records are available
to any employer who wishes to check.

Switzerland is a century behind the U.S. and most
EU countries in many respects.

And yes, I really need to eat…. It is so ****. I am a
qualified chef.

Chinese, Indian, Italian and French
cuisines, I can make any old ingredients taste nice
and I haven’t eaten for over 36 hours!! I have just
drank.. Do so most days off…

Can you see why I need help

I just need some help to stop.

darkstarpa

hammers,

I am going though what you are. Please continue to post on this portal.
Take it day by day, hopefully someone reads this post and can help you locally. You got to drink water and eat some food!

darkstar.

Dee74

I can see why - we've all been there and understand - s'cool

I had a bad at home detox, but don't worry noone here is going to force you to do anything you don't want to do.

Try and eat something. I used to eat tinned green beans or something, they go down easy.

Try and drink some water too - keep hydrated.

If you have any booze around get rid of it.

I spent a lot of time here on my first few days.
There's a lot of support.

Whatever it takes to keep you from going out and buying more booze.

It all starts with a day one

D

Hammers

Thanks, I have no booze left, just drank
the last of the red wine. I now have nothing
in the house.

I have two weeks holiday, and I have money,
quite a lot. I am well paid.

How do I stop myself from going out for more?

Hammers

I have to stop.

I want to stop today.

Dee74

I had to physically force myself to stay on this site...not only posting for myself but reading around and posting to others too.

In the end, i really wanted to stop. I had to make my decisions reflect that desire.

I'm not trying to downplay how hard it is, but there is support here, 24/7

why not check out the Class of August support thread - its for everyone quitting this month

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-1-a-4.html

D

Dame

I don't know your schedule or how traveling between Switzerland and Ireland works, but would two weeks give you enough time to get to Ireland, see a Dr. and get back? Is there a detox facility that could take you for that time? Just long enough to get you started?

I'm wondering if there are any 'alternative', 'unlisted' resources that won't betray your secret where you already are. At this point I would think serious action is necessary.

Don't give up. Make is a priority. Let your future start now.

Dee74

I think it's good to think about a recovery plan too - some sort of plan for the changes you'll make and how to handle cravings and situations

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

some good ideas about dealing with cravings here too:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

D

Hammers

Thank you. Thank you all. I have no booze
left and I am cooking something, and a big
pint (568 ml) cup of tea to go with it.

I am gonna sleep after. Then try to work out
how I am going to stop.

Thank you all for not judging me. I just need
help..

Thanks again..

fred59

good luck Hammers keep checking in here we will support you

Hammers

Thanks again for all the replies. I have read
a bit from the links and some from Google.

As I have to deal with this on my own, I need
a start point, and I think I will start with emptying
the room in my flat that I use as a dump. There must
be half a ton of empties. I wanted to put a picture of
it, but I don't have enough posts yet.

Berrybean

Why not get to some AA meetings, and get the help from people who have walked this path before you, and where your name will never come up on any register.

Anonyme Alkoholiker | Meetings › Bern

In the meantime, please remember that the main shared triggers for drinking using ' HALT '. This stands for Hunger-Anger-Lonely-Tired. In early sobriety we are so raw and reactive that any one of these can cause us trouble. So EAT. Lol. Sleep may be hard, but still try to rest, even if this is in the guise of snoozing in front of childhood favourite films or similar. If you find yourself getting angry, try to remember that generally, our own anger in itself is more of an enemy to us than the thing we are angry at. It gives us a false sense of strength (I believed that illusion for many many years, and it just kept me lonely and resentful, which in turn made me want to drink).

Recovering from alcohol has two parts. First, the alcoholic DRINKING, which can be dealt with through sobriety (keeping sober an hour or a day at a time - not punctuated by drinking by the way. Just one hour. Then the next. Then the next. But only thinking about getting through that amount of time while you're in it. Forever is too scary a concept at first). Then there is the alcoholic THINKING, which is more troublesome, drawn out and tricky. It causes us more pain than we ever expect it to. Dee has a great thread about making a plan, which is worth looking at when you're head is feeling clearer.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html

Keep reading and posting. We're here rooting for you, and remember what it is like to be in your position. For me that's just shy of 2 years and 5 month ago. Many others it's been a lot more, and others it's been less. But you can do this. If you want to recover more than you want to drink.

Dee74

We'll be here Hammer

D

Lightning Bug

Welcome! I hope you can find the strength and hope in recovery here with us.

thomas11

Hi Hammers, this thread really grabbed me. This may sound rough, but you sound very genuine in the fact that you want to stop. Considering the amounts you've consumed with no food, you should consider quitting while it is still a choice. That choice may be taken away from you (health or death) if you don't quit on your own. It's not easy, I will grant you that. But it can be done.

I'm sure it took some effort to learn how to cook all those cuisines, right? It's gonna take some effort to quit drinking. Wish you the best.