MidnightRider

Not feeling great. But optimistic never the less.

Greetings to the group.

I have been sober about 4 months out of the past 7 months.

Twice in past year I've been sober for nearly 60 days in a row .... But then I get to a point in sobriety that I think everything is cool and I can have a drink or 7. That goes fine for about 3-4 weeks until I start to feel that ugly and queezy feeling ...in my gut....... That's telling me that this is not how I want to live.

Today is Day 2 ..... Last drink was Sunday July 24 at 6pm.

I want to be sober. Clean, Happy, Live a Guilt Free life...... hold my head high and sober ;-). I don't want to be the guy that has to hide from people (because I'm drunk). I don't want my kids to see me this way. I want to have fun with my wife and not have her questioning me (since I hide my drinking). Mostly, I want to perform my day job with gusto... I want to write songs and sing strong and clear...

Thanks for listening.

TXStrong

Hey Midnight....You and I are both on day 2 with about the same time line....I woke up guilt free this morning based on my good decisions last night...We've got this! Your story sounds a lot like mine. I was deep into alcohol 2 years ago and just recently started dipping my toe in the water to test it out only to slip and fall. Not as bad as it was before but still not something I was comfortable with.

Here is to our next guilt free morning!!! Day 3 will be here before we know it!

KeyofC

Keep pushing, keep going, keep digging, keep working. You can do it. Since you've been here before and I mean struggling with sobriety...have you had a plan in place? If so, have you looked at it to see what you need to change where the other plan may have not worked so well?
Wishing you joy, please, and happiness

ExDrinkingCub

Hey we all have the same sobriety date! Same thing happened to me. I was doing well sober and figured I didn't need to be completely sober. All my other friends still drank. So could I right? And then one drink became 12 and it was a disaster for the next year or so. I woke up this morning and I don't have to hide who I am. I wasn't hungover. No regrets today or worries. Just me working to figure life out with a clear head. Let's all keep pushing forward together

soberclover

It is such a blessing each day to wake up guilt and anxiety free I really believe that this is one of the strongest motivations that keeps me continuing to make the daily decision to not drink!

MidnightRider

Thanks for the replies !

I'm feeling blah..... But I will take the blah feeling for now.

Not even thinking of drinking! Plus all the booze was thrown away down the drain yesterday!

Soberwolf

Welcome MidnightRider grats on day 2

Berrybean

Well done. We do need to accept some discomfort in those early days. Stay confident that it WILL pass.

Have you made a plan? http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html

ExDrinkingCub

Day two mostly done. Productive work day. But this ongoing saga with my landlord is stressing me out. The place is super clean (the best I could do being physically disabled). Today they were having the carpet cleaners come in which they said I had to (and will gladly pay for). I left a note saying "Thank You for hiring the carpet cleaners for me....please let me know if anything else needs attention and I will take care of it immediately" They just took the note, no response. So now my anxiety is skyhigh. Will I get evicted? Ugh at least my old response was to drink and we are NOT doing that.

ExDrinkingCub

Sorry meant to post that on my thread

Dee74

Welcome

D

MidnightRider

Day 6 and grateful.

I am writing this to tell myself all the positives of not drinking. So I can look back later if I start to get the itch again.

Body - after 5 days my stomach and lower body doesn't ache. Also I'm not running to the bathroom multi times in a row after eating. In addition, I am calmer now...I think it was mostly stress from worrying about drinking and being an alcoholic...

Sleep is better too... I am staying up later ( not passing out )... I am sleeping 5-6 hours in a row. Which is better than before.... When I'd wake up after 2-3 hours in middle of tonight ... Wide awake and terrified and guilty that I was drinking too much. Playing back the previous day... Wondering what in did or what I said to people. Stressed out about how much I drank.... ( did I really go thru nearly a 750ml of vodka in a day?)..

Now all that has subsided.

It is Saturday and the warm summer air is pleasantly inspiring... Time to do some yard work and sweat a bit.

I am going to work on one of my guitars that needs setting up. Which I couldn't do while drunk. Just didn't have the inclination, dexterity or mind to tinker.

Now I'm looking forward to it!

Hope ya'll have a great day ..
Rock on my friends.

Soberwolf

Congratulations on day 6 keep up the good work

Dee74

Congrats on day 6
D