How do you stop the world when you want to get off?
Recognising my AV
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: South West of England
Posts: 218
How do you stop the world when you want to get off?
When you just want to stop being nice, when you want to curl into a ball and hide from the world, when you can't give any more, when you need some introverted "me" time, when the rest of the world can go and do one, and you don't drink anymore yet the rest of your world does, and you really want to join them.....just to switch off - for one night?
Recognising my AV
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: South West of England
Posts: 218
Originally Posted by sugarbear1 
I read, take a bubble bath, meditate, play an online game, do crosswords, take a walk, paint.....
Looking for an instant fix that ain't booze
Sorry, just finding it difficult at the moment
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
If one is alcoholic ?
Originally Posted by Hendrix
and you don't drink anymore yet the rest of your world does
True, many but, not all in the world do drink a little booze.
But, most don't drink like an alcoholic drinks.
It seems that once started I (we) never get enough.
Best to face the facts straight on.
If I (we) drink yet again it will only bring on more misery in time.
Takes some work but, boredom can be replaced with serenity.
MB
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: NC
Posts: 662
I journal or look back and read my entries from when I was still using but wanted nothing more than to stop but felt I couldn't or from the first couple days sober when I was sick as a dog wondering why I ever did this to myself. I also volunteer, come on here and read and post, meditate, yoga, exercise or at least take a walk to clear my head, I clean, take naps or go to bed early, watch movies, read self help books or just any book I am into, call a family member or sober friend that is willing to be there for me...basically ANYTHING but drink or use.
I know it can be really daunting, but first things first you have to conquer the thought process of "everyone else can have one but me.....wahhh poor me". That is one of the most self destructing and sabotaging thoughts for a newly sober alcoholic or addict. I know it is easier said than done, that it is the most natural thoughts for an addict or alcoholic..but that is where disaster starts to show it's head. Writing down where I want my life to be in a year and then writing where it would be in a year if I didn't stop using is a good motivator for me. I also wrote a pro and con list for using and keeping a detailed journal have helped me stop wishing I was one of the "normal" people that could just have one.
Have you considered counseling?
I know it can be really daunting, but first things first you have to conquer the thought process of "everyone else can have one but me.....wahhh poor me". That is one of the most self destructing and sabotaging thoughts for a newly sober alcoholic or addict. I know it is easier said than done, that it is the most natural thoughts for an addict or alcoholic..but that is where disaster starts to show it's head. Writing down where I want my life to be in a year and then writing where it would be in a year if I didn't stop using is a good motivator for me. I also wrote a pro and con list for using and keeping a detailed journal have helped me stop wishing I was one of the "normal" people that could just have one.
Have you considered counseling?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Reno, Nv
Posts: 411
As a fellow introvert, I relate 
. Exploring this site can be fascinating. I've found some older threads that have really blown my mind. Or try visiting a part of the forum you haven't seen before.
When you get tired of that, I second the idea of going to bed early, maybe after watching some silly, bad TV....something that makes you laugh. For me it's Family Guy, or South Park. Laughter is great medicine. Seems like every couple of months I do go through I period where I just need to withdraw for a bit and stay in bed for 12, or 16 hours....
. Exploring this site can be fascinating. I've found some older threads that have really blown my mind. Or try visiting a part of the forum you haven't seen before.When you get tired of that, I second the idea of going to bed early, maybe after watching some silly, bad TV....something that makes you laugh. For me it's Family Guy, or South Park. Laughter is great medicine. Seems like every couple of months I do go through I period where I just need to withdraw for a bit and stay in bed for 12, or 16 hours....
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Hendrix
When you just want to stop being nice, when you want to curl into a ball and hide from the world, when you can't give any more, when you need some introverted "me" time, when the rest of the world can go and do one, and you don't drink anymore yet the rest of your world does, and you really want to join them.....just to switch off - for one night?
One night?
You relapsed long to long ago. And not just for one night. So thinking you can "switch it off" for just one night is mostly fantasy. Why do you feel this way? Because the AV is relentless and it worked last time.
I like the advice to go to bed. Let the world spin while you sleep.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 1,486
I've let wanting to switch off for"just one night" cause me to go into full blown week or longer benders too many times,there isn't just one night for us,try getting a walk/jog in,daydream if you're at work,whatever you can do to make it to bedtime for some reason the next day is almost euphoric feeling for me
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Queensland, Australia
Posts: 139
Originally Posted by Hendrix
When you just want to stop being nice, when you want to curl into a ball and hide from the world, when you can't give any more, when you need some introverted "me" time, when the rest of the world can go and do one, and you don't drink anymore yet the rest of your world does, and you really want to join them.....just to switch off - for one night?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
I find a little prayer and meditation always helps.
I need to be mindful of how I'm feeling. Once i know what my problem is (fear, anger, anxiety, whatever) I can do a quick slow and easy breathing meditation, thinking "God in (breathe in). Feeling (whatever it is) out (breathe out)" at least four times. I then follow that with some quick prayers. The serenity prayer is always applicable, as is the Do It Anyway prayer. The resentment prayer is very powerful when I'm angry with someone. I always start my day with these prayers so doing them at lunchtime or whenever I need them is like restarting my day when the one I'm in is getting a bit too much.
Helping others is always a good distraction from the self-pity that Velcros us to our emotions rather than letting them go. Perhaps look on this forum for someone who needs support or encouragement and give them some. Gratitude lists are helpful as well for the same reason. Also, reaching out to a friend who has yiur best intrest at heart, even if only by sending a text or email, or giving someone a call. You reached out here, so thats good. We can't always shift the world, but we can shift our perspective, and often it can have a massive effect of our lives when we manage to do this.
Chances are, you're reading the replies thing "yeah, that won't work, don't like that one, I don't do that, etc. Etc." Just remember, there are no problems, just solutions we don't like. Most of the things that worked (eventually ) for me in recovery were things I mentally rejected for a long time before I deigned to give them a go (just to shut people up to be honest). It's like I had to make sure I was really, truly and properly in pain before I gave m yself a chance to get better lol.
Anyway. Hope you feel better soon.
I need to be mindful of how I'm feeling. Once i know what my problem is (fear, anger, anxiety, whatever) I can do a quick slow and easy breathing meditation, thinking "God in (breathe in). Feeling (whatever it is) out (breathe out)" at least four times. I then follow that with some quick prayers. The serenity prayer is always applicable, as is the Do It Anyway prayer. The resentment prayer is very powerful when I'm angry with someone. I always start my day with these prayers so doing them at lunchtime or whenever I need them is like restarting my day when the one I'm in is getting a bit too much.
Helping others is always a good distraction from the self-pity that Velcros us to our emotions rather than letting them go. Perhaps look on this forum for someone who needs support or encouragement and give them some. Gratitude lists are helpful as well for the same reason. Also, reaching out to a friend who has yiur best intrest at heart, even if only by sending a text or email, or giving someone a call. You reached out here, so thats good. We can't always shift the world, but we can shift our perspective, and often it can have a massive effect of our lives when we manage to do this.
Chances are, you're reading the replies thing "yeah, that won't work, don't like that one, I don't do that, etc. Etc." Just remember, there are no problems, just solutions we don't like. Most of the things that worked (eventually ) for me in recovery were things I mentally rejected for a long time before I deigned to give them a go (just to shut people up to be honest). It's like I had to make sure I was really, truly and properly in pain before I gave m yself a chance to get better lol.
Anyway. Hope you feel better soon.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Jax beach fl
Posts: 143
Originally Posted by Forester
I find playing role playing games on my Playstation or computer is a great way to escape when it's all too much. I'm no longer a lonely alcoholic suffering anxiety and depression, I'm a battlemage finishing quests to preserve the free world or a valkyrie out to kick some butt and become the most awesome warrior that ever existed. It's a form of escapism I guess, but it gets me through hard times, sober.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
That's a really good question. How do you stop the world?
I gave myself permission to not do things I didn't want to do like go out for social events. My bedroom and my bed became a safe place. I found I was okay during the days but when evening came I felt agitated and restless.
My life is much more quiet now that I don't drink. I'm not even that terribly social, which is fine.
I gave myself permission to not do things I didn't want to do like go out for social events. My bedroom and my bed became a safe place. I found I was okay during the days but when evening came I felt agitated and restless.
My life is much more quiet now that I don't drink. I'm not even that terribly social, which is fine.
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Hi, hendrix.
When I want to stop the world I imagine that it's not real. And it's not so far from being true -to much extent it is created to manipulate and influence me, to make me part of collective hamster wheel which is put into motion by lots of people, people just like myself. And it seems so unstoppable that gives delusion that if it stop the world will stop rotating too.
But it will not.
The world of delusion may crash though -the world where all kinds of addication are promoted and ranked up to the status of normality. And it's too painful to give an extra thought to it because there seems no way out of this.
But there is a way. To do exactly what you said in your post -create introverted me time, shut off all the noise, and finally get access to another world, the one which doesn't demand you to sell your self piece by piece as a payoff to fit in.
It feels scary at first -like skydiving. The heart beats, mouth is dry, and fear keeps you from making a jump into new reality. But once you make that step you think "wow, why I have been waiting so long?! So, that is the way the freedom feels ".
It isn't selfish to disconnect from the world. It a necessity to regain and maintain sanity and balance in life.
Best wishes to you)
When I want to stop the world I imagine that it's not real. And it's not so far from being true -to much extent it is created to manipulate and influence me, to make me part of collective hamster wheel which is put into motion by lots of people, people just like myself. And it seems so unstoppable that gives delusion that if it stop the world will stop rotating too.
But it will not.
The world of delusion may crash though -the world where all kinds of addication are promoted and ranked up to the status of normality. And it's too painful to give an extra thought to it because there seems no way out of this.
But there is a way. To do exactly what you said in your post -create introverted me time, shut off all the noise, and finally get access to another world, the one which doesn't demand you to sell your self piece by piece as a payoff to fit in.
It feels scary at first -like skydiving. The heart beats, mouth is dry, and fear keeps you from making a jump into new reality. But once you make that step you think "wow, why I have been waiting so long?! So, that is the way the freedom feels ".
It isn't selfish to disconnect from the world. It a necessity to regain and maintain sanity and balance in life.
Best wishes to you)
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