30 days today
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 73
30 days today
Day 30 of sobriety. Unfortunately, I am having a difficult moment. Actually, it has been a difficult 24 hours. I only say moment because I hope the obsession will stop asap. I'm out by the pool. Beautiful sunny day. Just can't stop thinking about alcohol, both the good times and the bad. I know how much better off I am now. But drinking was habitual for so much of my life that it seems weird without it. I want to just enjoy the silence but today I can't. My AV won't shut up and let me enjoy my Sunday. I am just going to post this now because every time I go to post something, I delete it instead.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hey Val
Congrats on 30 days. That is great.
I relate to how you feel. I was sitting outside in the yard, breeze, the sun, looking up at the trees. I didn't have a craving. I actually realized that if I had been drinking, I would probably be inside, holed up, being drunk. Maybe the first few drinks would have been in the sun...but the next few days (if I didn't manage to stop) would be hell, ending with detox. That's my reality. Sometimes it helps me to remember that. I know the longer I'm sober the more natural it becomes.
Hang in there.
Congrats on 30 days. That is great.
I relate to how you feel. I was sitting outside in the yard, breeze, the sun, looking up at the trees. I didn't have a craving. I actually realized that if I had been drinking, I would probably be inside, holed up, being drunk. Maybe the first few drinks would have been in the sun...but the next few days (if I didn't manage to stop) would be hell, ending with detox. That's my reality. Sometimes it helps me to remember that. I know the longer I'm sober the more natural it becomes.
Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 2,578
Hey ValThistle, congratulations on 30 days -- that's huge! And good for you for posting. It does get easier.
when my thoughts get stuck in a rut, I find it helps to change up my activity somehow. Posting is a good start. Also things like taking a walk, calling a sober friend, tackling a little project, helping a friend with a chore. You can get through this if you remember that those drinking thoughts are just thoughts, they will pass, and they can't "make" you drink.
when my thoughts get stuck in a rut, I find it helps to change up my activity somehow. Posting is a good start. Also things like taking a walk, calling a sober friend, tackling a little project, helping a friend with a chore. You can get through this if you remember that those drinking thoughts are just thoughts, they will pass, and they can't "make" you drink.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 486
30 days is HUGE, so congratulations. But I will let you in on a little-known secret: most of us still miss drinking at 30 days. But the romanticizing of drinking WILL abate, I promise. I am on day 118 and I can tell you that I went to a party last night and you could not have given me ANYTHING to take a drink.....do as other bright people have said above my post and play it through. Do you REALLY want to wake up tomorrow and start over at day 1. It is the WORST feeling EVER.
Stay strong and stay close. You are VERY smart and BRAVE for being able to post here, and that takes someone with internal insight.
Best,
Lee
Stay strong and stay close. You are VERY smart and BRAVE for being able to post here, and that takes someone with internal insight.
Best,
Lee
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Stl,mo
Posts: 115
Congratulations on day 30 that is wonderful. As others have said do something different to occupy ur mind. Get u a nice sparkling water and enjoy that u can actually enjoy the weather. I know when I was drinking I rarely went outside and when I did I didn't enjoy it or remember most of it. So sad. Stay strong!
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
ValThistle, congratulations on 30 days!
I get you, that pool time can be touchy.
I don't know if this helps but this is what I used to do. Instead of thinking of my AV as a sweet, nagging voice whispering in my ear and making me want to drink I gave it a different visual. I thought of it as a force that was trying to make me do something I really didn't want to do. In other words it was being really snarky and laughing that it was going to get me to do it. I visualized it as saying "You'll do it LadyBlue, I know you're weak, I'm stronger than you and watch, I can MAKE you do something you don't want to do". (insert evil laugh after the line)
Man did I have a fight with it then. I snarled back at it and told it to shut the h&% up and get away from me. I told it to stop interrupting my pool time. After a bit it realized it had been defeated and sulked off and I WON.
Sounds a little crazy I'm sure but hey, it worked for me.
I get you, that pool time can be touchy.
I don't know if this helps but this is what I used to do. Instead of thinking of my AV as a sweet, nagging voice whispering in my ear and making me want to drink I gave it a different visual. I thought of it as a force that was trying to make me do something I really didn't want to do. In other words it was being really snarky and laughing that it was going to get me to do it. I visualized it as saying "You'll do it LadyBlue, I know you're weak, I'm stronger than you and watch, I can MAKE you do something you don't want to do". (insert evil laugh after the line)
Man did I have a fight with it then. I snarled back at it and told it to shut the h&% up and get away from me. I told it to stop interrupting my pool time. After a bit it realized it had been defeated and sulked off and I WON.
Sounds a little crazy I'm sure but hey, it worked for me.
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: West Wales
Posts: 1,630
Congrats to 30 days Val. Please don't drink!
Today is my 31st day and I can tell you it feels great, I wouldn't want you to miss that feeling. I'm proud of my 31 days and I want you to be proud of 31 days tomorrow. PLEASE DON'T DRINK.
Sending you (((Val))) and strength, You can do this Val.
Today is my 31st day and I can tell you it feels great, I wouldn't want you to miss that feeling. I'm proud of my 31 days and I want you to be proud of 31 days tomorrow. PLEASE DON'T DRINK.
Sending you (((Val))) and strength, You can do this Val.
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