High alert - maybe too high
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Join Date: Jan 2012
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High alert - maybe too high
I am happy alone and am really fulfilled at the moment - let alone pretty protective of my time, and I've been dating a bit. I've ended things with a few guys - none of them were anything even remotely serious. I am having fun and excising "letting them go" when I get an inkling that they aren't right for me. It's been good practice and maybe I am getting too good at dumping and letting some good guys go - but oh well...I need the practice 
I am not super comfortable or confident in my decisions regarding new people in my life and based on gut feelings, but I'm getting there.
I've gone on 2 dates with a cute cowboy - completely opposite of me - I hate horses (it's ok, they hate me too) and I'm a metal / rock kid and like a total of 3 country songs (just because they are about fishing.)
Hes fun, sweet, chivalrous and kind. I got in his truck Friday and noticed a pile of crumpled cans under the back seat and immediately thought welp, Firebolt - you will pay for half of dinner, and then gracefully end the night with "I don't think we're it, but thank you."
That last line ran through my head all through a really fun dinner (where neither of us drank alcohol.)
Then we got back in the truck to leave and I scoped the cans again.
Arizona tea.
Haha
At least I am not ignoring red flags anymore....
But I don't know if busting out the magnifying glass and microscope looking for them is such a great thing either. There HAS to be a happy medium. I would love to think that if I end up at his house one day, I won't go searching through his fridge and freezer for evidence...
I am not super comfortable or confident in my decisions regarding new people in my life and based on gut feelings, but I'm getting there. I've gone on 2 dates with a cute cowboy - completely opposite of me - I hate horses (it's ok, they hate me too) and I'm a metal / rock kid and like a total of 3 country songs (just because they are about fishing.)
Hes fun, sweet, chivalrous and kind. I got in his truck Friday and noticed a pile of crumpled cans under the back seat and immediately thought welp, Firebolt - you will pay for half of dinner, and then gracefully end the night with "I don't think we're it, but thank you."
That last line ran through my head all through a really fun dinner (where neither of us drank alcohol.)
Then we got back in the truck to leave and I scoped the cans again.
Arizona tea.
Haha
At least I am not ignoring red flags anymore....
But I don't know if busting out the magnifying glass and microscope looking for them is such a great thing either. There HAS to be a happy medium. I would love to think that if I end up at his house one day, I won't go searching through his fridge and freezer for evidence...
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
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I think that's great awareness you have going on there, Fire Friend.
It takes a lot to be able to see yourself so clearly that you also see when you are overreacting. (I hope you actually LOL'd at yourself when it happened.)
That darn middle ground can be SO difficult to find/stay balanced on! It's more unrecognizable to me than the extremes of over & underreacting and I never want my past experiences to make me so jaded that I automatically assume the worst in every situation or draw negative energy into my life by expecting it/making room for it.
So, hmmmmm... a cowboy, eh???
It takes a lot to be able to see yourself so clearly that you also see when you are overreacting. (I hope you actually LOL'd at yourself when it happened.)
That darn middle ground can be SO difficult to find/stay balanced on! It's more unrecognizable to me than the extremes of over & underreacting and I never want my past experiences to make me so jaded that I automatically assume the worst in every situation or draw negative energy into my life by expecting it/making room for it.
So, hmmmmm... a cowboy, eh???
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Posts: 5,103
I won't go searching through his fridge and freezer for evidence...
I think its good you are working on finding that middle ground to stand on and get comfortable with but most importantly I see that letting go of what doesn’t feel right has become a good habit for you.
Have fun dating!!!!
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Join Date: Jan 2012
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It takes a lot to be able to see yourself so clearly that you also see when you are overreacting. (I hope you actually LOL'd at yourself when it happened.)
That darn middle ground can be SO difficult to find/stay balanced on! It's more unrecognizable to me than the extremes of over & underreacting and I never want my past experiences to make me so jaded that I automatically assume the worst in every situation or draw negative energy into my life by expecting it/making room for it.
That darn middle ground can be SO difficult to find/stay balanced on! It's more unrecognizable to me than the extremes of over & underreacting and I never want my past experiences to make me so jaded that I automatically assume the worst in every situation or draw negative energy into my life by expecting it/making room for it.
The middle ground is impossible for me it seems. I feel like i'm just always walking a fence line not knowing which site I *should* be on. Which side is *right*. ...and with zero understanding of why one is more right than the other. I don't want to be too judgey of others....then realizing i am being judgey of myself for being too judgey or not judgey enough. What a paradox. And I am at a loss of how "right for them" comes so naturally to healthy people!!
So, hmmmmm... a cowboy, eh???
Change is good
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FB, google it-I know you don't have a clue what in talking about
FB...though it's a little personally disquieting to me that he didn't clean that crap out of his back seat before picking you up
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fb, some time ago I read about how the autopilot on an airplane works. It locks onto a heading and then continually makes small corrections to stay on course. It is NOT static. It is NOT rigid and unchanging. It overshoots in one direction, then fixes that by overshooting in another direction. But all in all, the end result is that the plane gets to where it's going. I think you're just looking closely at your autopilot during one of its course corrections...
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Originally Posted by honeypig 
fb, some time ago I read about how the autopilot on an airplane works. It locks onto a heading and then continually makes small corrections to stay on course. It is NOT static. It is NOT rigid and unchanging. It overshoots in one direction, then fixes that by overshooting in another direction. But all in all, the end result is that the plane gets to where it's going. I think you're just looking closely at your autopilot during one of its course corrections...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
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fb, some time ago I read about how the autopilot on an airplane works. It locks onto a heading and then continually makes small corrections to stay on course. It is NOT static. It is NOT rigid and unchanging. It overshoots in one direction, then fixes that by overshooting in another direction. But all in all, the end result is that the plane gets to where it's going. I think you're just looking closely at your autopilot during one of its course corrections...
Thank you HP....and that makes 4 country songs I know.
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