Why am I so needy????!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I think that's pretty common. Alcohol lowers inhibitions, big time, so often times buried feelings/emotions that are under check when sober, come screaming out when drunk. Of course they are always warped and misdirected but I believe that the core feeling is repressed in there somewhere. Oh the crazy things I do when drunk!
My guess is you need connection and nurturing, maybe don't know how to get it unless you're drunk. And then ya probably still don't get it because who wants to hang around a needy drunk? As Soberwolf said, the answer to that question can probably be answered while you're sober. Learning to connect in a healthy way, and asking for my needs to be met, is really tough for me. I relate.
My guess is you need connection and nurturing, maybe don't know how to get it unless you're drunk. And then ya probably still don't get it because who wants to hang around a needy drunk? As Soberwolf said, the answer to that question can probably be answered while you're sober. Learning to connect in a healthy way, and asking for my needs to be met, is really tough for me. I relate.
Totally common and a lot of people still seek tons of attention in sobriety as well. I see young women all dressed up in tight outfits just working the room at AA meetings. I think it boils down to how we feel about ourselves in the inside. The steps really helped me become comfortable with who I am....not constantly trying to seek validation from others.
my selfish, self centered nature is my main problem
I'm an extreme example of self will run riot
self - me me me
will - my thinking
run - moving quickly downhill
riot - out of control
just like my drinking was out of control ...
... my thinking always and only about myself is out of control
I'm an extreme example of self will run riot
self - me me me
will - my thinking
run - moving quickly downhill
riot - out of control
just like my drinking was out of control ...
... my thinking always and only about myself is out of control
I agree with Soberwolf on this one. Ask the same question as you strive to get sober. You will probably find you don't have the same problem the longer you stay sober.
I have definitely become more independent with sobriety.
I have definitely become more independent with sobriety.
I did a lot of drinking alone and when I was sufficiently intoxicated and feeling good, I would start texting or Facebooking people. I was certainly looking for attention. I would make up stories about things I was up to in life to cover up for the fact I was drunk, alone on my couch. I realize that this attention seeking behaviour is driven by the loneliness that many alcoholics deal with after pushing people away.
I still cringe at the many asinine drunken messages I have sent out in my desperate plea for attention.
I still cringe at the many asinine drunken messages I have sent out in my desperate plea for attention.
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