Fabela

I have an appointment with my Dr tomorrow to discuss Antabuse. It sounds like a good idea, but I would love to hear from those of you who've tried it. The thing is that I worry about the side effects. I am extremely self destructive, I overeat, I drink, I cut myself to show others what a bad person I am. I've had a gastric bypass, and the doctors warned me about the dumping effect (if you eat too much you get really, really sick) and I used that to inflict pain on myself. I'm worried that I'll use the Antabuse the same way.

I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts on Antabuse.

Edit: I am on anti depressants, I am in therapy and I am getting help for those issues (it just doesn't work)

ZenLifter

Hi Fabela. All I can say about the Antabuse is it never worked for me.... cause I never took it. Sounds like you have some other underlying issues that need addressing though. (((Hugs)))

Anna

I have not tried it Fabela.

ScottFromWI

I've not tried it either, but I think you really need to listen to what your doctor and therapist have to say. You have underlying issues to work out that play into your drinking and other destructive behaviors, and if they feel antabuse could help solve them I would trust their judgement. Many psychological issues cannot be solved until we are sober for a while, so that may be part of the logic, but please ask them to be certain.

Mountainmanbob

The stuff seems to give many some good sober breathing room.
Mountainmanbob

sleepie

I took it and stayed sober for a month. I had no side effects.

You really cannot drink on it though, not a drop.

August252015

Last year I took it sporadically and even drank while on it. I didnt get sick except once. That experience w it was a waste.
I now take daily as prescribed and do not drink. It is just part of my routine, one more the to do for my recovery. So it is s good thing for me; am going to talk to my dr next wk ant stopping it at upcoming 4mo mark.
I have had no averse symptoms but it would be a waste of money and your drs help to misuse it.

zoomi

let's put it this way...you have to take it for it to work. I would pretend like I took it but I didn't.... it works for short term quiting

AnvilheadII

i hope you will be as honest with your dr tomorrow as you have been with us here. let him know your fears, your competing and compromising mental health issues so that you can begin to build a solid holistic plan that addresses EVERYTHING.

MariahGayle

If you question whether you might drink while taking Antabuse you probably should not take it. Drinking while taking Antabuse or not allowing enough time after you've quit taking it can be deadly!! Be honest with your Doc RE: destructive behavior. Hoping good things for you!

ChancesAh

I used it. I found it made me ridiculously tired during the day. I was on it for about 8 weeks. I was well aware of the side effects of drinking with it so I was too scared to drink. I honestly don't believe I would have made it without it.

Meraviglioso

I have taken it a couple of times and think it is a great drug to help people build up some sober time. I say that even though I suffered some side effects- being unusually tired during the day (even when taking it at night) and a metallic taste in my mouth. Again, though, i recommend it.
I like the way my doctors prescribed it to me, entrusting it to someone else who was in charge of watching me swallow it daily. This was to make sure I took it, one. And two, as a way of symbolically showing that I was not alone in the journey.

As for your worry that you might use antabuse and drink as a way of inflicting self harm, this needs to be discussed with your doctor. I have said before that I have very little understanding of self harm but from what I do understand this is very different. This isn't going to give you the "satisfaction" of making cuts and feeling a pinpointed pain. This isn't going to be like overeating until you must vomit to feel relief. Drinking on antabuse is a completely out of control experience. You will not be in control of conflicting pain on yourself- only drinking and then experiencing whatever hell it is that your body decides to do to deal with it. It will likely lead to a hospitalisation due to extreme vomiting, fever, feelings of having a heart attack or an actual heart attack.
My own real life experience is that I drank one glass of wine TEN FULL DAYS after my last dose and only barely prevented myself from collapsing in a restaurant. I had to leave and go outside where I played down on the ground, soaking wet, soaking my clothes, writhing in pain.
I am not a cutter of self harm in any way, but this felt much different that what I imagine the pain you feel feels like, this wasn't pain, it was one-step-away-from-death suffering.

While you have your meeting today do you think you could ask about a longer term inpatient treatment to address all of your destructive behaviours in a safe, round-the-clock environment?

Fabela

The appointment was a strange one. I have only met this doctor once before, just briefly on Monday. He had read all of my files, and this is the first time someone has taken a step back and viewed my history as a whole instead of focusing on the smaller parts. He was very clear on a couple of things: He didn't want to give me Antabuse, because in his opinion, I'm not an alcoholic. Yes, I abuse alcohol, but not in a way that needs to be treated with medication. He viewed the alcohol problem as a symptom, just like the over eating and the self harm. He also told me about a long term treatment for trauma patients, where I finally can start focusing on the root of my problems, the trauma itself. It's an inpatient treatment, and it lasts about ten weeks with weekly follow ups afterwards. The waiting lists are long, but I finally feel that I've been heard. This is what I have wanted for a long time.

So, even though I didn't get Antabuse, I have found a tiny glimmer of hope and I know that I don't need to drink today. I'm coming down with a cold, and the thought of a nice cup of tea and a good book while snuggling under my blanket is much better than the alternative.

Meraviglioso

Fabela, that sounds amazing! I cannot tell you how happy I am to read this. It really does sound like someone has seen you as a whole person and put in the effort to find a treatment plan that will help you heal as a person from the inside out instead of putting bandaids over the various symptoms.
Did the doctor give you an estimate for how long you have to wait?

Fabela

The website says up to 20 weeks, but I really don't know. The Dr. said that he would prepare a referral in cooperation with my therapist within next week, and then I might get an idea of how long this would take. I feel awful that I can't start work again in the fall, like I had planned, but then again, if I keep going like this, I won't be able to work at all. I have to invest this time in myself.

scintillady

I have found antabuse to be the only thing that keeps me sober after trying many other things. I have not had ANY side effects, but once I used an alcohol based toner on my face (didn't think about it) and it burned like crazy. I have had a couple relapses where I decided not to take it so I could drink on vacation, but that was a disaster and I learned my lesson and started taking it and continue to take it. It can be very dangerous if you drink on it so I no longer am even tempted. Now I take it every day and it has worked beautifully. I would not be sober today without it.