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I want sobriety more than a drink. And I'm in a bar.

Old 06-04-2016, 10:59 AM
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I want sobriety more than a drink. And I'm in a bar.

Happy Sober Saturday!
I don't know about you all but I'm thrilled to wake up today without feeling like I've been punched in the face. I got my self up, had a healthy non hungover breakfast, spent an hour Journaling and writing out my goals and got to crossfit. Now I stopped at the corner pub on y way home.

GASP.

I was HUNGRY and wanted a salad and a Diet Coke. And to chat with my friends there

Crazy, you say. But think about it. Whether we are drinking water or vodka isn't there a reason we go to a corner pub? Part of it is to get out of the house, maybe see friends? And we we don't have to do that with a drink. Sure there's a ton of booze around me, but I'm more interested in my salad and my friends.

This is the first time a quit has not been about what I can't have, but what I can. It's about being able to be alone and read my journal at a bar with my coffee or soda. What else would I be doing? Searching for my lost lover n Facebook with my face buried in vodka dwelling n the past instead of the future.?

I can' let this quit turn me into a hermit. That's why it never worked before. I know this isn't the best for everyone, but for me, I need to continue the things I like, seeing friends, eating hahah, and sitting with my thoughts and my book while people are around me.

Anyway,it's time to write out next week's exercise and aa plan. Look forward, not back. It's a brand new day. Use it wisely.

😀😀😀😀
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:17 AM
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Originally Posted by snarky View Post
Crazy, you say. But think about it.
Three days sober? Yes.

And I have thought about. When I quit drinking I had to do more than put down the drink. I couldn't live my drinking life--bars, parties, alcohol centric activities--just without the alcohol. I had to make the changes that would support my recovery.

Can I go in a bar and not drink? Yes. But I have been in recovery almost 6 years. You have three days. You don't have to be a hermit your whole life, but you might think about removing yourself from temptation in the early weeks and months. You'll have plenty of time to prove your sobriety--when you have acquired some.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:18 AM
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You're writing from a bar?

Get the heck out of there.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:20 AM
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:25 AM
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You can meet friends for a salad and Diet Coke anywhere. A bar is the last place you or anyone in early sobriety needs to be. Sorry...not a good idea at all.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:26 AM
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Personally I won't do it. Im sober today because I nurture my sobriety not challenge it
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:27 AM
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Ok
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:29 AM
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Taking post down. I was looking forward to coming in today. Instead of being happy to see my friends who work here and writing in my new journal I feel like a bad kid now. I may as well go home and do my laundry or something.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:30 AM
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At 3 days the alcohol may not even be out of your system yet. A better place for you to go would be a meeting where you can talk to other people and make some sober friends. Sorry your balloon is being broken but if you really have a problem and you really want to change you have to change many things in your life and one of them is not hanging out where drinking takes place, at least not for quite awhile.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:32 AM
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I put my quit date as my first aa meeting. It's been several weeks, I felt going to aa meant it was real to me. I'm sorry. Mods, please close post
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:36 AM
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I just noticed the last line of your post mentions AA. Have you asked for your sponsors opinion on this subject?

Like they say, your best thinking has put you in the position you are in so it might be a good idea to follow the advice of others for awhile and see if that works out better for you.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:39 AM
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Often along with the drinking comes the lifestyle along with it. At 3 days it's normal to still feel attached to it. That being said, hang out in a barber shop long enough, eventually you'll get a haircut. A bar is not where you need to be. Take care, don't beat yourself up over it.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:40 AM
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Snarky I get where your coming from . I know a couple of alcoholic folk who can go to social functions anywhere but they are years down the sober road , Personally I cant do it in these early days so i'm going with the advise offered above and urge you to also .
Take care and enjoy your sober time
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:44 AM
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Just not sure but I have noticed these days
that none of my friends hang out in bars.

Maybe it's just me ?
MB
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:44 AM
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Point taken, we can stop the beating now. I'm trying to figure out how to cancel my subscription here.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:51 AM
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Do not cancel it!!!

That would be silly. I was one of the people that kept going to functions after quitting. I always had a plan and left early but I went did my thing and left. It's NOT easy and it puts it right in front of you so it's not recommended in early sobriety.

Every person is different and YOU write your story.

I always say that from these post you need to take what you like and ignore the rest.

PLEASE don't leave. This place is a precious resource.

Want to add that I don't hang in bars but I do go for special things. Just a clarification.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:52 AM
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Snarky, please consider that all posts here have been made out of genuine concern for your sobriety and well-being.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:55 AM
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You don't have to leave SR because you got some advice that doesn't jive with your idea of your sobriety. Like they say in the rooms, take what works, leave the rest. And please don't resent the advice that comes from people who have tread the journey you are now undertaking.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:58 AM
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I don't think anyone here meant to upset you, snarky.

I believe they were trying to pass along what they've learned in recovery.

Please reconsider closing your account. You can really benefit from all the combined knowledge here.
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Old 06-04-2016, 11:59 AM
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Thank you I'm about to go finish planning my week now. Thanks, for the support, much appreciated
I live with an alcoholic so it's sink or swim, ha. If I can't handle lunch alone in a bar or restaurant, how am I gonna handle it at home, ha! I hide my AA from my family. They wouldn't support it - so it's really a matter of - there is no choice... I have to deal and deal properly. Thanks all...
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