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Old 05-27-2016, 05:05 PM
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Alcoblog

Need to quit. Been a while since I felt this committed. Don't know how long it will last. I feel really discouraged right now but I think it would be helpful for me to log how I feel right now and for the next few days on this thread. Hope this isn't a waste of space. I haven't gone a day without booze for the last month and a half and my drinking has really escalated. I managed three weeks before that but feel that I was only really sober when I managed a year without booze 4 years ago. No more excuses now.

Right now I can really feel the anxiety setting in. I know it's withdrawals but I've never done relief drinking. From past experience it lasts about 3 days at its worse so at least I have the weekend to recover. Wish I hadn't drunk last night though. I feel so edgy and short right now. Doesn't help that I only got 3 hours sleep last night.
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Old 05-27-2016, 05:08 PM
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Pour out your heart here. It is a safe place to talk. We are here for you.
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Old 05-27-2016, 05:19 PM
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This can totally be your thread to chronicle your progress and thoughts while quitting drinking; the more you post, the more we'll read and encourage you. That's what this amazing site does best! Stick around...Arp
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Old 05-27-2016, 05:22 PM
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You will feel better tomorrow!

Drink lots of water and rest as much as possible.
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Old 05-27-2016, 05:23 PM
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Thanks. Yes back in 2013 I tried keeping a paper diary but I actually lost it after a month! Luckily I'd really written it anonymously! Of course I didn't stay dry much longer after I lost it.
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Old 05-27-2016, 05:34 PM
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I was in your situation this time last week. The anxiety is really tough to sit with. I was on a destructive bender and had to stop. Day 7 and the anxiety is almost cleared. Hang in there!
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Old 05-28-2016, 12:58 AM
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Hmm lasted whole but that's no surprise. It's now the time I'm most at risk of taking a swig. I can also feel my anxiety mounting. Hope I last.
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Old 05-28-2016, 01:28 AM
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What are you going to do different this time?

I reached the point of desperation brokenness when the drugs (of which alcohol was just one) stopped working. Sure, I still got loaded, but I still felt like me. I couldn't escape any longer, not enough.

I did not want to go to meetings (NA in my case, but the steps are the steps). But I was desperate, so I went every day. Sometimes twice a day.

I didn't want to stop using, but I did, and renewed my commitment every day. I called someone before I used. I stayed clean one day at a time.

I did not want to get a sponsor and work the steps, but once again I was desperate, and I started to meet some guys in the fellowship who clearly had what I wanted, they were comfortable in their own skin. However, they had been where I was. They let me know that NA (and AA) were 12 step programs, not going to meeting programs.

I have found that NA (and AA) work only if you actually do the work. Any other recovery programs will have the same caveat. None of them are magical.

We all understand how you feel. We've all been there. No one goes to SR or AA or NA because they feel great and their life is wonderful.

The real question is not how you feel, but what are you willing to do to recover?
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Old 05-28-2016, 04:08 AM
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Thanks. I think I'm over the worse of it for today and will not be swigging anything. At least till tomorrow. Then it'll be yet another day. The anxiety is still pretty bad but not through the roof. My muscles are starting to ache like crap though. Like I've run 10miles.
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Old 05-28-2016, 04:23 AM
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running is a fantastic sobriety tool

keep at it

don't drink

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Old 05-28-2016, 06:28 AM
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I made it! I think I'm safe. Just for today. Won't be drinking. 1st time in weeks! Now the hard slog starts.
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Old 05-28-2016, 06:31 AM
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Congratulations! Don't go it alone! Read around and post here all you want, and get to an AA meeting!
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Old 05-28-2016, 06:47 AM
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Congrats on making through the day. I think keeping a log/blog is a great idea. You can use it for real time support and also read back to remember why you quit in the first place.
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Old 05-28-2016, 08:31 AM
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Good news is you never have to feel this way again. Every part of our lives does get better each and every day we choose not to poison it with our addictions. I look forward to seeing this accountability thread grow on a daily basis. Wishing you the best today, priceyjunk!
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Old 05-28-2016, 01:55 PM
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Day 2 now. First time in a long time I'm living without a strong sense of guilt or shame. Anxiety isn't so bad now, more a vague worry I'll stuff it up again. But day 3 is usually when things get really bad again. Will just have to watch myself very carefully today. Wish me luck!
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Old 05-28-2016, 02:05 PM
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Grats on day 2
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Old 05-28-2016, 08:09 PM
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Still going strong. Not near my most vulnerable period yet. But life is sure throwing quite a few curve balls. Car's broken down, family are being difficult today. Also have have been forced to cancel one of my evenings next week that was meant to help me stay away from booze. Already o can feel myself planning for a relapse! But I have to hold on. The anxiety is also mounting now.
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Old 05-28-2016, 08:22 PM
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Originally Posted by priceyjunk View Post
Still going strong. Not near my most vulnerable period yet. But life is sure throwing quite a few curve balls. Car's broken down, family are being difficult today. Also have have been forced to cancel one of my evenings next week that was meant to help me stay away from booze. Already o can feel myself planning for a relapse! But I have to hold on. The anxiety is also mounting now.
I'm on day 1, and knowing that other people on here are going through the same sort of situation helps quite a bit. We can get through this Lets stay sober today!

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Old 05-28-2016, 09:13 PM
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Danger seems to have passed! Helped by a large dish of ice cream. Not planning a relapse now but still a few more hours to when I'm at my most vulnerable.
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Old 05-29-2016, 12:00 AM
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Flare up of temptation again. Anxiety less, so less to prevent me from thinking about the consequences of taking a drink. But of a struggle at the moment.

I have this problem where I associate certain foods with having a type of drink , especially foods I like. Like barbecue with a beer. So that's another trigger for me. Maybe I should just try to have a sandwich tonight. I don't tend to associate sandwiches with any type of drink. My family will think I'm crazy
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