sianlee

I first posted in early January 2016. I kicked my partner's butt to the kerb because I could no longer live with someone addicted to heroin.
I went no contact, changed my phone numbers and even my personal work phone number. I have not seen him or spoke to him - until I answered a knock at my door and there he stood .
Now, after 4 months of no contact, he knocked on my door and asked if he could 'borrow' £1,000. He said he was in trouble. (I did not let him in to my home) I laughed and told him to go away. He then asked for £10.00 - some drop from a £1,000 huh?
He has been dealing and said 'someone' had stolen his drugs! He was rattling and looked like a pile of chit.
I sent him on his way (with no money of course) but his unexpected, or should I say, 'expected' visit has knocked me sick.
I am doing really well and moving on with my life and this has floored me. I would never ever even contemplate going backwards. On and off I have had 13 years of hell thinking I could 'change' him.
I guess I'm just asking for a pick-me-up from you great guys. I am feeling down.

biminiblue

You did the right thing. Well done in protecting yourself. Keep up your guard.

My ex husband did that one time. The next time he did it I didn't open the door, and I told him from behind a locked door that I was calling the police. I couldn't be sure he left, so I did call the police.

atalose

They are so predictable aren’t they and always always about them!!! You dodged a bullet and good for you for being so strong and standing your ground.

AnvilheadII

just to be safe, double check the door and window locks. addicts can go to some pretty desperate measures.

as for you, you did so very well!!! that was pretty bold of him to ask for £1,000 !!! amazing how quickly he was willing to drop the amount!!! he'll need a whole lot of 10 pound notes, won't he!

i suspect the real story has a bit of a different nuance to it......he doesn't sound "sane" enough in his addiction to be dealing very much.....more like he'd be dead if "someone" had fronted him a £1,000 worth of dope!

hopeful4

Oh man. They turn up like a bad penny. Never fails.

I get it. You are plugging along, doing your own thing, then bam...there they are. Something similar happened to me yesterday in dealing with my XAH, he sent me a text that sent the wind from my sails. It's like getting kicked.

Just know you are not alone, we are here, understanding. You did the right thing and should be proud!

Many hugs!

Bekindalways

Irk Sianlee! This really illustrates the power of ""no contact". However they really can find you specially if they have managed to conjure up a strong delusion of the likelyhood of being lent 1000 pounds; it made me laugh too.

Kudos to you for your very healthy response in the situation. As you know, you will feel better shortly but man oh man it is a kick in the gut!

hopepraylove

You can take out a restraining order against him, if he shows up again, you can call the police and have him arrested. I know it sounds extreme, but unfortunately it's what my situation came down to. Happy to hear you're doing well, keep moving forward--don't look back. Hugs.

sianlee

I'm feeling a bit better today and thanks for the support everyone.
I thought I was doing well 4 months of no contact, because he has never been gone that long before.
He called again a second time which resulted in a phone call to the Police who are supporting me. The Police are well aware of what he's been up to and he is being watched. They couldn't tell me more because it would interfere with their investigation. I'll leave him in their hands.

Bekindalways

Glad you are feeling better Sianlee. It is really interesting the impact other people have on our moods and lives whether it is a brief encounter with your XABF or a bunch of electronic whackadoo strangers like us on a forum.

Hope you got your pick-me-up from us. Come back for more if needed!