CaveGirl

At him, at myself, at the disease, at how my life has been upended... And I can't really focus on anything else.

Seems every time I think I am free yet another bill comes in or shoe drops.

Just needed to say that.

hopeful4

At some point, you will get tired of focusing on this all the time and will move forward. Addiction pi$$es me off, not doubts about that. However, once you realize it, you see it everywhere. Not one of us is alone, that is for sure.

Eventually you will focus on you, your life, your choices, and be at peace with them.

Many, many hugs!

StacyR

He is 32 days dry and I am 34 days guilty for being so angry....

AdelineRose

I find that when I start to get mad I do some breathing techniques, do some yoga, do the rosary, call a family member or friend not to talk about the issue but to just chit chat about them and any funny stories they might have, take a walk, do something physical so I have to focus on that, etc.

The more you refuse to let the anger in, the more you will notice that you are in control of your emotions. I am not saying you do not have a right to be mad, but at the same time is it worth it in the end? It isn't productive and it brings you down and in the end it is what it is unfortunately.

I am trying to live my life with the motto that I am in control of my reactions, of my feelings, and of my actions. I can cut people out, I can allow people in, and I can decide what my quality of life is.

I hope you feel better, sometimes a kickboxing class or getting a punching bag can really relieve a lot of that anger.

hopeful4

AR...a punching bag is a great idea. My daughter's and I have been thinking about that!

CaveGirl

I definitely do all those things (except the punching bag) but sometimes it sneaks in... And then I feel like the punching bag. It's not my nature to be angry... No need for that I'm a forgive and remember sort.

Just yet another bill arrived and annoyed me. (We are only apart six weeks so a few stragglers)

Thanks for the hugs... I don't like to talk about it too much and I find it really nice to just let it hang out here.

CaveGirl

Yep I hear you...

hopeful4

Everyone, and I mean everyone, needs a support system. A sounding board.

We are here for you!

dandylion

CaveGirl.....I think it is normal, at this point to be angry. Every emotion is real.....
and anger, well directed can be a great motivator.....it can, sometimes give the impetus to accomplish what you couldn't, otherwise....

Now, of course, we all have to manage our emotions so as to cause destruction........

It is good to recognize what we ARE feeling...because,to stuff them down is recipe for problems of all kinds, down the road.....

dandylion

CaveGirl

Yeah I know. I had a friend in town last week and she was impressed with how much I am moving forward. I'm surprised myself sometimes. I'm also surprised at how well I sleep.

Yesterday I got the most wonderful support out of the blue. A friend just told me I was amazing for buying my new house (10 minutes before I was freaking out) and then my dad called me to offer to fly across the country to help me move because Ex 'bailed on me'... My dad doesn't know all the specifics.... But boy did he hit the nail on the head. His alcohol and drug problem made him bail on me even before I dumped him...it was a great lightning bolt, he'll never know how right he is!

. I was feeling great... Then one more bill I'm going to have to cover showed up and I was annoyed again.

Liveitwell

I have learned that under all anger, at the core of it, is hurt and/or fear-mostly hurt. If you can deal with those underlying emotions and understand them and release then , you may find the anger will fade. Getting to the root of our emotions is key !

Btw-it's totally normal to be angry at this stuff/I don't know how you couldn't be !

Hugs and please come back to vent any time!