MagillaGorilla

Sometimes I just want to be out of the house. My dad took me back in after I left detox 6 months ago and I have only had one relapse, 4 months ago. I have been going to AA meeting regularly but sometimes I dont want to go to a meeting. I just want to go rent a movie by myself, or get tobacco cans...ON MY OWN. Anyone else feel suffocated by their siblings who live far away, always judging you.

BorntoHula

Back when I didn't have my family's trust, ie after they had saved my you-know-what after a detox or rehab, I would often leave my wallet with them when I just wanted to go out for some fresh air, for the sake of giving them some peace of mind. No ID/money meant no alcohol.

Maybe next time if you want to buy something by yourself, tell them what you intend to buy, only take the amount of cash necessary and show them the change and receipt after. Trust has to be earned, no?

Maybe what you perceive as judgment is their worrying about you.

TryingSoHard

What Hula said. You have to earn back trust, and that takes time. To you, 4 months feels like a long time, and it is definitely time to be grateful for and proud of! But to your family 4 months is just a blip on the screen. It takes time for them to be able to see our changes and commitments.

I always logically understood this, but it still stung whenever my husband would make me promise I wasn't going to drink today before he left for work in the morning. Or when he'd come home in the middle of the afternoon to check up on me. Or when he'd want to see the receipt from Costco or the grocery store when I got home. It stung, but deep down I knew that he was doing these things because I had shown him, through my own choices and actions, that he had to if he wanted to have any faith in me whatsoever. I hated it, but I'm sure it was nothing compared to how he felt every time I promised him I wouldn't drink and then he came home to find me plastered (and swearing that I hadn't had anything to drink).

It just takes time. You can best show through your actions that you deserve that freedom and trust again. It will come.

Soberwolf

Great idea BH

thomas11

Its likely they are doing it out of care and concern, not punishment. It takes time to earn that trust back. I assume you are fairly young so 4 months probably seems like a long time, but it is not. Lastly, none of us are "cured". So cause for concern is legit.

Anna

I think we simply do have to regain the trust of family. However, be cautious that comments that are made are not upsetting you. If they are, it might be an idea to take a step back briefly, until you feel stronger.

Dee74

Have you talked to your family about this Magilla?

D